


My Whole Life

by AttackoftheDarkCurses, thebuildingsnotonfire



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Author Drunk Writes, Ben and Rey are close in age, Ben’s an Idiot, Best Friends, Comedy, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Kiss, Flirting, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up Together, Happy Ending, Healthy Communication, Let’s See Who Breaks First, Mutual Pining, Probably Going to be Adorable, Rey Will Make Him Suffer, Reylo Baby, Sharing a Bed, Shower Sex, Smut, Spanking, Teasing, Tropes, Wedding Fluff, excessive use of alcohol, marriage pact
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-16
Updated: 2018-09-18
Packaged: 2019-06-28 02:24:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 46,451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15698199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AttackoftheDarkCurses/pseuds/AttackoftheDarkCurses, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebuildingsnotonfire/pseuds/thebuildingsnotonfire
Summary: “Oh, Ben, you didn’t. Tell me you didn’t.”“Does it help if I say I’m sorry?”Rey took a deep breath and exhaled through her nose, repeating the cycle a few times before she turned back to Ben and explained calmly, “My mother is under the impression that I’m bringing my fiance home.”“So…”“So,” she sighed, “if we don’t sort this out with your father before he tells anyone-”Ben interrupted, muttering, “Everyone’s going to think we’re getting married.”After a moment of silence, Rey groaned. “Well done, Ben. Well done.”





	1. Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Equilibrium is getting a bit dark, and while Onfire writes and edits, I need something fluffy, so I decided to combine and fill a bunch of prompts. Don't expect any major issues in this one - this is really just a dozen chapters of fluff, because that's what I need right now. (Thanks, Equilibrium, for ruining my heart). Onfire is beta'ing!
> 
> Oh, also, this is partially inspired by the song "Out of My Head" by Theory of a Deadman (that's also where the title came from).

It was a rainy day in Seattle when Ben Solo took one last look at his luggage, and frowned. He ran a hand through his long hair, and groaned in frustration. He was definitely forgetting something. A few minutes of rummaging through what he'd already packed -  _suit, ties, shoes, pajamas, toiletries..._ nope. Still couldn't put his finger on it.

Rather than drive himself insane trying to figure it out, he decided to check with Bazine - she was the one with the checklist, so maybe she'd be able to jog his memory. He shuffled out of the bedroom, down the staircase, and walked into the minimally-furnished living room where she was perched on a settee with black upholstery.

He froze in his place the minute he heard the conversation she was wrapped up in.

"I know,  _I know_  what I said honey, but his mom's a senator and you know...there's a ton of family money. Like,  _old_ money."

Ben's eyes narrowed.  _Honey?_  And...he hadn't mentioned anything about his family to his girlfriend - he  _never_  mentioned his family to anyone he dated-

"No honey, of  _course_  I don't love him, but think about it. He hasn't said a word about a prenup. I think I can lock this down before the end of the year."

Lock this down? Before the end of the year?  _What._

It was October, and Ben hadn't even considered proposing. Though, considering the other things he'd just overheard, that was probably for the best.

 _Wonderful_ , he thought sarcastically.

A familiar feeling of resentment welled in his chest, though unfortunately, it wasn't a surprise -  _this_ was exactly why he never talked about his family.

But for some reason, it wasn't particularly disappointing. His girlfriend was fun, and on the surface she seemed perfectly kind and pleasant to be around, but he'd been noticing more and more that she wasn't the type of person who was content to relax at home when she had the option of going out and spending a ton of his money. Not that there was anything wrong with shopping or going to expensive restaurants...it had just started to rub him the wrong way because it had started to seem more expected and less appreciated. Lately, it had started to seem like she was more interested in his wallet than in spending time with him.

Now he had confirmation that the voice in the back of his head telling him to end the relationship was spot-on.  _What had he been thinking,_  planning to take her home for Maz's wedding?

Ben cleared his throat, interrupting the incessant chatter about the lavish wedding she was apparently planning ( _yikes_ ), and watched calmly as she jerked her head back in surprise.

Marrying a woman who was apparently excited about a lack of prenup, and who was calling someone  _honey_ , while reassuring said person that  _no, of course she didn't love him?_

Yeah, no thanks.

Twenty minutes later, Ben was in a cab, hurtling through the rain and headed to the airport with one fewer travel companion than he'd originally planned for.

_Bullet. Dodged._

* * *

Rey Kanata focused on taking deep breaths as she sat in the passenger's seat of her friend's car. The small cardboard box on her lap held the meager possessions that had been decorating her desk, and five minutes into the drive she found herself crying over a small plastic bobble-head cat, a small leafy plant in a blue pot, and half a dozen framed pictures.

It was oddly cold for early Fall - even for Chicago - and she shivered as she curled up into her thin jacket, waiting for the heat in Rose's car to kick in.

"I can't  _believe_  Plutt fired you. You were easily one of the best employees," Rose argued, "I wish you'd have let me go in and yell at that asshole."

She drew her lips into a semblance of a smile and looked up at her friend. "It's okay," she sighed. "I needed to get out of there anyway. He's a terrible boss, and you always say it's a waste of my degree-"

"And I stand by that," Rose interrupted. "Graduating with a 4.0 from a mechanical engineering program and then taking an office job that barely requires the ability to read was one of the stupidest things you could have done."

"It paid the bills," Rey replied weakly.

The woman rolled her eyes and pulled up in front of the apartment Rey shared with her fiance, "Sure, it paid the bills, and that was a great reason to accept the job when you graduated, but  _Rey_ , it's been seven years. As much as I think Plutt is a douchebag for firing you, this was a blessing."

After a moment, Rey groaned and said, "I just wish it hadn't happened right before my flight. Now I get to explain this to mom  _in person_. She doesn't need this stress right before her wedding."

Rose parked in front of the brick-faced apartment building and sighed, taking a moment to mull over Rey's words.

"On the bright side, you basically have a week long vacation," Rose offered optimistically. That was the great thing about Rose - she could always put a positive spin on things. "Taking a week at home will help you put this out of your mind," she reasoned. "Worry about job searching when you get home.

"Yeah," she sighed, sinking further into the passenger's seat. "Yeah, Rose, you're right. I just need a break from all the stress."

"Absolutely," the woman grinned. "Now come on, Snap's probably waiting for you. You have a flight to catch and a wedding to attend."

Rey glanced down at her watch and nearly jumped out of her seat. "Yeah, shit, I've got to get going if I'm going to make the flight."

Rose nodded and followed her out of the car, taking the cardboard box of Rey's desk accessories while Rey unlocked the building door.

Two flights of hardwood stairs later, Rey realized she should have known better than to think her life could ever be stress-free.

Upon walking into her apartment, she was nearly blown back by the sight that greeted her.

"Who the  _hell_  are you?"

It was an unusually rude way to meet her new neighbor, but since that neighbor was currently in a surprisingly intimate position with Rey's fiance, it seemed reasonable.

It was a shame. When Rey and Snap had noticed the young woman moving into the building the previous week, she'd seemed perfectly nice, but given the current situation, Rey was no longer interested in making friends.

She exhaled sharply, then covered her eyes, hoping she might uncover them to find that the beautiful, perky redhead was just a figment of her imagination. But no, there she was. Sitting on Rey's fiance's lap. Naked.

 _Well._ That was certainly  _one_  way to welcome a new neighbor.

Rey quickly realized she'd have to stay calm enough to hold Rose back because, while tiny, the woman was a fucking attack dog when provoked, and apparently seeing first-hand evidence that her close friend was being cheated on was  _provoked_.

Of course, there were the cliche excuses:

"It was an accident!"  _...how do you accidentally fuck someone?_

I wasn't thinking straight!"  _...oh, you don't say?_

For half a second, Rey considered snapping back with the retorts her brain vomited, but the words felt unnecessary. There was no pull toward him. No instinct saying  _maybe we could work through this_. It seemed worthless to attempt.

She just felt cold. Bitter, even.

After apologies were said, excuses made, and all the dust settled, Rey was packed and ready to be anywhere but the cute one-bedroom apartment she was no longer planning to call home.

It had never really felt like home anyway, and she was starting to see why that was the case.

Rose, still fuming, helped her carry a couple bags out and, without asking if Rey needed a ride, loaded them into her own car.

Whatever chill there was in the air seemed to be gone, subsumed by the hot coal sending licks of flame through her chest. There weren't any more tears to spare - or maybe it just wasn't worth sparing them for the catastrophic mess she'd seen back in the apartment.

God, what did it say about her that she cried more about losing a crappy job than breaking up with her fiance?

Her and Rose got in the car, Rose slamming her own door hard enough that Rey guessed she was imagining doing that to Snap's face.

"It's okay, Rose, I can call a cab."

"Don't even think about it," the woman said, waving her off. "Trust me, if I don't spend the next half an hour driving you to the airport, I'm going to end up going back up there and beating the shit out of that idiot."

Rey managed a laugh. "If I didn't have a flight to catch, I think I'd help you. That sounds wonderful. Does it help to know that I threw the ring in his face?"

The woman frowned and thought it over before nodding. "A little." She looked up at Rey and said seriously, "Hey, are you going to be okay?"

"I'm less than two years from being thirty and in the span of four hours, I got fired from a dead-end job that could have been done by a well-trained dog,  _and_  I walked in on my fiance fucking my neighbor," Rey said dryly. "And, I'm about to go spend a week at home to be at my mother's wedding. Trust me, everything is  _just peachy_."

Rose snorted. "At least they serve alcohol on the plane."

"Oh, Rose," Rey sighed, "Sometimes I wonder if you can read my mind."

* * *

Ben's first flight from Seattle to Chicago went off without a hitch, but upon arriving at O'Hare he looked up at the outgoing flights board and groaned. The 5:30 PM flight from Chicago to Logan was delayed by two hours, and now he had time to kill. Ten seconds of consideration led to him settling down onto a stool at a dimly-lit airport bar filled with other mostly-pissed off travelers.

"Well,  _hello._  Mind if I sit next to you?" a purring voice asked.

He turned just far enough to see a woman with long, dark hair tucked over one shoulder. Just with a glance he noticed long legs that were only flattered by a black skirt and heels. Objectively, he would have said she was very attractive but after the day he'd had, he was hardly interested.

He lowered his head in a nod and looked beyond her, trying to see if there were any private booths available. "Uh sure, but-"

Time froze. Or maybe it rewound, because suddenly Ben was a teenager all over again.

At some point in the minute or so he'd been sitting at the bar, a few patrons had gotten up and left, leaving him with an unobstructed view of the woman four seats from him.

Part of him hoped it was her. Part of him hoped it wasn't. The last time he'd seen her…

Ben cringed at the memory. At nineteen he hadn't made the smartest choices (at least not when it came to her), and part of him knew, deep down, he'd probably broken her heart.

But  _oh_ , she looked like home. In fact, she might have been the only part of  _home_  he ever craved.

Her hair seemed like it was a little shorter than it'd been when he'd last seen her years earlier, but she still had it up in the three endearing buns she'd worn when they were children. She wore plain black leggings and a short-sleeved white tunic that showed off her tan skin, still just as sun-kissed and freckled as he remembered. A voice in the back of his mind insisted that he walk over and sweep her up into his arms  _immediately._

The lights of the bar were suddenly very bright. Very bright, and very hot.

The woman he'd been about to politely tell off huffed and walked away as he continued to stare. Finally, he stood and spoke up.

" _Rey?"_

Rey looked up from the drink she'd been nursing, saw him, and lit up. A huge, wonderfully familiar smile stretched across her face. "Ben?  _Seriously?_ Were you supposed to be on the 5:30 PM?"

_How did he deserve a smile like that?_

"Hey," he breathed, still not believing his luck. "Yeah, I am." The odds of running into her at an airport...he'd completely forgotten that she'd moved to Chicago after college. Logically, he knew they were headed to the same destination, but  _still_.

She hopped off her seat and slid her drink over next to his, still beaming as she moved to stand in front of him. "Me too. Wow, I haven't seen you in years."

"Ten, actually," he muttered, cursing himself as he reaching to tuck a loose strand back behind her ear. "It's been way too long, Rey. Come here," he said, pulling her into his arms. She sighed contentedly and rested against his chest.

Time travel may not have been invented yet, but magic may as well exist because feeling her head against his upper body, tucked in his arms? It was like the last ten years had never even happened.

"Sorry," she said after a moment, "I'm kind of drunk.  _Ish_."

She was smiling as she said that part, a brilliant curvature to her lips and a rosy bloom on her cheeks. She still had dimples when she laughed.

_Adorable._

Ben laughed, and scolded, "Drunk at an airport? What made you think that was a good idea?"

"Well, you see," Rey started, finally letting him go so she could sit down and take another drink, "I got fired today. And then I went home and found my fiance balls-deep in another woman."

He waited for the punchline. It was a weird joke, but…

"Wait, you're serious?" he asked, dumbfounded.

Rey nodded.

"Shit," Ben let out a low whistle. "Okay, I get it now. Next drink's on me."

The girl next to him smiled softly, and rested her head on his shoulder. It was as if nothing had changed between them. Maybe nothing had, but Ben had a feeling there was no way he could ever be so lucky.

Maybe this was the good fortune he'd been due, after the crap day he'd been having.

"Not to compare stories, but if it makes you feel any better, I just found out that my girlfriend of about a year was basically only interested in what I could offer her financially." He paused and tried not to let the revulsion and hurt show when he said the next part, "And, I'm pretty sure I was the  _other man_."

She grimaced over at him, shook her head, and clinked the glass she held against his. "You know, for being relatively normal people, we apparently have shit luck with relationships."

"We really do," he agreed. Ben glanced over at the woman his best friend had grown into, and couldn't help but grin. He took a long drink before muttering, "There's always that pact we have to fall back on."

Crap. He'd said that last part out loud.

Rey paused for a moment before throwing her head back in laughter. "Oh my God, that's right!"

"You forgot? I'm  _wounded_ , Kanata," he joked. "After all, I  _am_ almost thirty."

"You're ridiculous," she snorted. A moment later she'd finished off her drink and signaled for another.

Within ten minutes, she was fast asleep with her head on his shoulder, and Ben couldn't help but laugh. Rey never could handle her liquor.

* * *

He'd never been more thankful for Rey's small frame than when he was half-carrying her through the airport. Thankfully she was just awake enough to shove her passport and ticket into his hands, and miraculously they made it on the plane with time to spare, without anyone asking questions about why he was basically carrying a passed-out woman onto a plane.

The second Ben got her buckled into the seat next to him, she fell back to into a deep sleep, resting her head on his shoulder. He tried not to snort as he noticed her drool slightly onto his t-shirt. Suddenly the phone in his pocket began to vibrate and he yanked it out with plans to ignore the call (Bazine had called a dozen times already), but saw it was from his mother.

He picked it up and said quietly, "Hey mom, sorry, I'm on the plane now, I've got to shut my phone off in a few minutes."

"Hi Benny," Leia said warmly, "we heard you got delayed. We'll meet you at baggage so you don't need to take a cab."

Ben winced. With the delay, it would be the middle of the night by the time the plane landed. "It's okay," he assured her, "I can take a cab, or maybe the train. It'd probably be easier that way."

Though, now that he was going to need to get Rey home, that probably wasn't true.

"Don't be ridiculous," she scolded. "We're picking you up and that's final." Then she hesitated and said, "Benny, your father and I wanted to tell you something and we can't keep putting it off. I didn't want to tell you over the phone, but I want you to be prepared-"

"What is it?" he asked suspiciously. Leia Organa was  _not_  the sort of woman to be anything but upfront, and her hesitation was throwing him through a loop.

"It's about me," his father replied, having taken the phone from Leia. "I keep telling your mother not to make a big deal out of it, but it's my heart. Doctor's said I've got a couple years, max. If I'm lucky."

Something in Ben's chest squeezed. He hadn't been home since the last time he'd seen Rey, and now…

His dad seemed to notice that something was wrong, because suddenly his jester's voice was softer, gruffer, and maybe a little more purposefully unbothered. "Look, don't let it bother you, kid. Everyone's gotta go someday."

"Dad," he choked, "don't talk like that. There's got to be something the doctors can do."

Han just chuckled. "They already did it. Or, tried. It's a moot point now. I'm just glad I'm going to get to meet the woman who's gotten you to settle down."

Some stupid, poorly evolved part of Ben's brain decided to answer, "You've already met her Dad."

"Oh?" Han asked curiously.

Then Ben managed to somehow dig his hole even deeper.

"Yeah dad, it's, uh...it's Rey."

* * *

Twenty Years Earlier

Ben had just turned nine when  _she_  arrived.

His neighbor, Maz, came over for a visit, and he knew almost immediately that she either had very good news, or very bad news, because she'd made her famous chocolate chip cookies. Those were generally reserved for three, and only three, occasions: good report cards, birthdays (he'd already gotten his batch for the year), or...well, sometimes when his parents were fighting, he'd visit her and she'd bake them while she took his mind off things.

He'd been laying on his bed when his mother called for him to come down and greet Maz, and he turned the corner so quickly he nearly fell down the stairs. He stopped quickly, clinging to the railing before he could lose his balance.

And then Ben froze for an entirely different reason.

Maz was at the entry, smiling up the stairs at him with the plate of cookies in her hands, and peeking out from behind her…

The short, skinny little girl had a smudge of dirt across her cheek, and she looked completely uncomfortable. Ben understood that feeling well...the Organa-Solo home was far from  _homey_. It was more like a castle than anything.

He watched curiously as the girl stared firmly at the floor, only looking up when his mother walked over to her and said softly, "Hi sweetheart, I'm Leia. It's so nice to meet you."

Then she looked up at him and said, "Ben, come say hi."

It took him less than a minute to get down the stairs, and when he got there his mother nudged him toward the unhappy girl whose hair was pulled into three peculiar buns at the back of her head.

The night before, his mother had explained to him that Maz was adopting a child who was about a year younger than him, and she'd expressed her hope that they'd be friends. All Ben had thought was that Maz probably wouldn't have time to help him work on his calligraphy once she had her own kid.

But...he hadn't been expecting this girl.

He could be friends with this girl.

"I'm Ben," he said shyly, holding out his hand.

She looked down at his hand and then folded her arms across her chest before she returned what she'd been doing previously - glaring down at the floor.

_So much for being friendly._

Ben scowled and pulled his hand back just in time to hear her soft voice say one word:

"Rey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to come chat on Tumblr - and feel free to prompt us. Apparently we're incapable of oneshots.
> 
>  
> 
> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)  
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	2. Plotting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, that was a surprising reaction to the first chapter! I didn't expect so many people to love the tropiness (seriously, I'm not sure how to spell that), so here's chapter 2.

The depth of his mistake hit him about half an hour before they landed at Logan Airport.

Rey was going to  _murder_ him.

As if she could hear the screaming that had been happening inside his mind, Rey groaned and nuzzled against his chest before finally cracking open her eyes. She peered up at him and he bit back a laugh when he saw what a mess her buns had become.

"Hey Rey," Ben said softly, mindful of her possibly hangover. "We're going to land in a bit and," he paused, and swallowed hard, "I  _may_ have done something. Something you probably won't like."

He got chills as her eyes narrowed and she said slowly, punctuating each word in staccato, "What. Did. You.  _Do?_  I know that look. That's the same look you had when you broke my mom's antique cookie jar and blamed it on me." She pulled back until she was sitting properly in her seat, and tilted her head. "Spill, Solo.  _Now_."

Oh good, so she was still terrifying. Great.

How did she manage to be both adorable and terrifying?

Within minutes he'd told her about his father (news he regretted telling her, because he  _hated_  to be the reason for the sadness that suddenly filled her eyes), and he'd explained how Han was just happy to be meeting the woman Ben was bringing home.

She'd frowned at that. "I thought you two broke up. I'm guessing he didn't handle  _that_  news well."

"Well, we did break up," he said carefully. "Uh...so. Okay,  _this_  is where the fuck up comes in. I  _may_  have told dad that  _you_  were the woman I was bringing home."

Ben winced as the realization of the situation hit her.

"Oh, Ben," she breathed, "you  _didn't_. Tell me you didn't."

"Does it help if I say I'm sorry?"

Rey took a deep breath and exhaled through her nose, repeating the cycle a few times before she turned back to Ben and explained calmly, "Ben, my mother is under the impression that I'm bringing my fiance home."

"Oh  _shit_. So…"

"So," she sighed, "if we don't sort this out with your father before he tells anyone-"

Ben interrupted, muttering, "Everyone's going to think we're getting married."

After a moment of silence, Rey groaned. "Oh, well done, Ben. Well done."

He was kicking himself, mentally, and he wasn't going to tell Rey but there was  _no_  way Han hadn't at least told his mom, and once his mom knew  _everybody_  would know.

"I said I was sorry," he offered weakly. "What was I supposed to do? Apparently he's really sick and this is basically his dying wish."

Rey shook her head and signaled to the stewardess as she walked by. When the woman stopped, Rey slapped on a smile and said sweetly, "Hi, I'm going to need some vodka."

The woman paused, and said with a chipper tone, "We're landing soon, but I think I have time to bring some by. What would you like it with?"

"Oh, no," Rey corrected dryly. "You misunderstand. I just want vodka. As much as you can legally give me. That might be enough." Then she thought for a moment and grinned broadly at Ben - it was a devilish look that he recognized all too well, and she added, "My  _fiance_ will take care of the bill."

The stewardess blinked, but resumed her usual happy-expression and replied, "Okay, I'll be back in a minute."

 

* * *

Rey was  _fuming_.

She'd been bitching Ben out since finishing her second shot (she'd taken them straight, no chaser - it was just  _that sort of day_ ), and proceeded with her angry ranting as they walked through the airport.

"Two?" She snapped at nobody. "I can't believe they can only give you  _two_ shots on a plane, that's fucking ridiculous! Like, I'm sorry, but after  _this fucking day_ I think I'm entitled to more than two!""

She needed to be  _far_  more drunk than two shots of vodka would allow.

"You know, maybe we should calm down," Ben chuckled nervously. "The sooner we get to baggage, the sooner we can sort things out with my Dad. He probably hasn't even told anyone. I'm sure everything will be fine."

 _Fine_. He said that as though her entire life wasn't crumbling. As if her childhood best friend and all around could-have-been-the-love-of-her-life hadn't just managed to commit her to a fake marriage.

Also, it occurred to her that Ben was a terrible liar and it was clear he knew  _damn well_  it wasn't going to be that simple.

Long story short, Rey needed more vodka.

She stopped in the middle of the wide airport hallway and glared back at him, daring him to say another word. They were a minute from baggage claim, and, while probably absurd, her instinct was to literally stare him down as if she wasn't more than half a foot shorter than him.

Not that intimidating him would help anything, but Rey thought  _maybe_  it'd make her feel better.

"Look, Rey," he said quietly, "I promise, I'll explain everything to him and it'll be fine. You don't have anything to worry about."

 _Oh no, not a thing_. Just like she absolutely didn't have to worry about how her heart fluttered every time he smiled at her.

Goddammit. She hadn't heard so much as a peep from him in ten years and now  _this?_

The moron had just up and  _left_ for college on the other side of the country, not bothering to send more than a short message every once in a while (though at some point, that had stopped entirely), and now -  _now_  - her heart was all  _oh yes, this one, we like this one, don't you remember how great this one was?_   _Just look at his arms, don't you remember how much we liked those? How about the lips? Those were great!_

Rey simply wasn't drunk enough for this bullshit.

She sighed, realizing she was too emotionally exhausted to be angry, and finally muttered, "Fine. I'm sorry for getting so mad at you. I understand why you did it. I just...I wish you hadn't."

The tension in his shoulders visibly relaxed, and Rey felt guilt swell in her gut for getting so snippy with him. She really did understand why he'd do such a thing, and rather than apologize for her behavior, she took a step closer, and hugged him.

His hugs were still incredible.

Shit.

That was not good.

Ben's arms slowly came to tighten around her as she said quietly, "I'm really sorry about your dad."

"Yeah," he said, resting his chin on top of her head, "me too."

"Have you figured out how you're going to explain it to him?" Rey asked. She released him from the hug, and as they walked the last hundred or so feet to baggage claim, she added, "What are we going to do if he told your mom? Oh, imagine if we'd had to explain this to  _my-"_

They turned the corner to baggage claim, and the rest of Rey's words were drowned out by the noise of -  _oh God -_ all of their parents, there to greet them.

Rey watched in horror as the blood drained from Ben's face, and it was only then that she realized her soon-to-be father, affectionately nicknamed Chewie, had said, "Took you two long enough to make it official!"

Han was chuckling like the son of a bitch he was.

He'd told them.

Of  _course_  he'd told them.

She quickly turned her back to their parents to stare up at Ben as if he'd have some sort of answer to fix the mess he'd gotten them into, but instead he hesitated.

Rey could tell the moment he'd made a decision and she had a bad feeling she knew what it was. She got confirmation when he wrapped his arms around her waist, picked her up into what probably looked like a very sweet hug between a loving couple, and whispered in her ear (her heart absolutely did  _not_  pound when his lips briefly grazed her skin), "I'm so sorry, I will do anything to repay you if you play along."

_Play along?_

_Was he insane?_

When he put her down with a tentative kiss to her brow she nearly gut-punched him, but a voice in the back of her head had a different suggestion for how he could  _truly_ be made to suffer, and in a split-second, she decided that  _sure, no problem_ , she'd play along...but she was going to make her best friend's life a living hell while doing so.

It might be the only thing that would get her through the week with her sanity still intact.

* * *

Ben knew he was in deep shit the minute he saw the look on her face at baggage claim.

Somehow he only got more nervous as a sly grin formed on her lips just before she gave him a short nod, and turned back to their parents to confirm that they were,  _indeed,_  engaged. He noticed his mother shoot him a disapproving look the moment she noticed Rey's ringless hand.

 _Oh_ , what the hell had he gotten them into?

The forty minute drive from the airport was something he'd been dreading half the flight, and now that he and Rey were piled in a van with his parents, Maz, and Chewie (the groom, and long-time family friend), it was worse than he'd been expecting.

Ben had assumed it would be a ride fraught with never-ending questions about what he was doing with his life and why he hadn't been home in a decade, but now their conversation centered around the surprise engagement they apparently all knew would happen someday. Luckily, Rey had fallen asleep again, because he was pretty sure she would have been getting violent at that comment.

Sometime around the phrase "our grandchildren will be  _so_  beautiful," Ben became painfully aware that Rey was, in fact, not sleeping. He discovered that just as she started  _pinching_  him. Like she was a damn child who'd decided to take her frustration out on him, as if it was all his fault.

Except...well, it sort of was his fault, wasn't it?

It was a relief when they finally arrived home a few minutes later...at least until his mother piped up from the passenger's seat, commenting, "Benny, we made up your old room for you two."

"You could have stayed with us, but we would have had to share a bathroom since the one upstairs is being renovated," Maz explained. "Your mother and I figured you'd be more comfortable with a bit more space to yourselves."

"That's perfect," he replied, struggling (and failing) not to yelp as Rey presented him with a particularly vicious pinch to his abdomen. "Just let me wake Rey up."

The other passengers in the car all wore varying levels of knowing expressions, and Ben really could have just laughed hysterically at that point because, despite the fact that Rey's head was basically in his lap, whatever they thought was going on in the backseat was  _truly_  far from reality.

A minute later their parents had gotten out (probably incorrectly thinking they needed to give their children some privacy), and they were alone in the car. Ben scooted away from her hissing, "Would you  _quit it?_  That fucking hurts!"

"Chill," she muttered, "I barely pinched you, and you deserve so much worse. Did I hear correctly? Our children are going to be adorable, and we're staying in your old room?"

"I think the word they used was  _beautiful_ , actually."

Rey's head jerked up to glare at him. " _Really._ That's what you choose to focus on?"

"You're never going to forgive me for this, are you?" Ben groaned.

"Oh I totally am," she said flippantly. "Probably.  _Maybe?_ We'll see. I'm just a bit annoyed at the situation." She sighed, and explained, "I'm really glad Han's happy, and I  _did_  agree to play along, I just...I didn't really think about what playing along would involve. But I said I would, and at this point explaining it to them would probably be an even bigger headache."

He felt a rush of relief at the fact that she didn't hate him for everything, and said slowly, "Okay, so, maybe we should talk about this. If we're going to pretend to be engaged for a week, we should set some ground rules. Or...limits? I guess?"

She snorted. "Are you asking me what my safeword is?"

Ben blinked.

_Was she messing with him on purpose?_

Slowly glancing over at her, Ben felt his jaw drop. "I- no- why-" he stammered. "You  _know_  that's not what I meant. I just mean that I want to know what you're comfortable with."

Rey nodded, dropping her smirk. "Yeah, okay, that's smart. So," she thought for a moment, "it's got to be believable. But, that shouldn't be too hard, right? I mean, we were always close."

 _Very close_ , his mind amended.

"That's true," Ben said, his mouth suddenly going dry. "Staying in the same room should help. Though, I can take the floor, if you want."

She looked over at him with an eyebrow raised before saying, "Uh, I'm not sure if you recall, but we've shared a bed before. I really don't see why anyone needs to sleep on the floor."

Oh, he recalled. He'd spent a while recalling  _those_ experiences.

Often while in the shower.

Ben had to turn away, knowing for a fact that a blush was forming across his cheeks. "Fair enough," he said quietly. "So, what about other stuff? While we're around people?"

Rey tapped a finger against her lips, caught up in thought. "Honestly I think if you're really committed to pulling this off, we're just going to have to go for it. I don't think they'll buy it if we don't."

"Go for it?"

Ben almost didn't dare to ask what that meant.

"You know," she shrugged. "Hugging, kissing, pet names. All of that. It's just...we were always very close and affectionate. I'm not sure they'd buy it if we weren't affectionate now."

 _Kissing?_  He hadn't kissed her in ten years and just the  _thought_  of doing it again...

Dead. He was a dead man, and his cause of death was going to be Rey.

He swallowed hard, trying to focus on the other things she'd said. "Pet names?"

"Just use something generic," Rey suggested. "I don't know. Sweetheart? Honey? What's couple-y without being really obnoxious?"

After a moment, Ben shifted closer on the seat, until his thigh touched hers, and he turned toward her, cupping her cheek with one hand as he whispered, "What about  _darling?"_

 _Stop flirting with her, dumbass._ What the fuck was wrong with him?

"Yeah," she said thickly, "Yeah, that'll work." Then she cleared her throat and folded her arms over her chest.

Ben let his hand drop back to his lap, and he sighed. "You're going to completely fuck with me all week to get revenge, aren't you?"

"Ah," she smiled sweetly, " _darling,_ you know me so well."

* * *

Nineteen Years Earlier

A year into her new life with Maz, Rey still couldn't believe her luck. The woman was an absolute angel, insisting on tucking her in every night with a cup of mint tea (even though Rey insisted that nine was  _far_  too old to be getting tucked in), and  _oh_  she baked the most amazing cookies. Rey had never had a mother before - at least not one that chose to stick around - but she was pretty sure Maz was exactly what a mother was meant to be like.

It had taken a lot of getting used to - the idea that people actually  _cared_ about her. And it wasn't just Maz...Han and Leia, the couple next door, were wonderful too. They'd showed up that Christmas with armfuls of food and presents, and they'd made Rey's first real celebration something out of a happy holiday movie.

Leia had even gone shopping and to movies with Maz and Rey a few times, and Rey found herself thinking that, if she hadn't been completely attached to Maz, Leia would have absolutely been her next choice for  _mom_.

And Han? Well, he was the reason Rey discovered her love of cars. He ran a garage with another man (nicknamed Chewie), and sometimes Rey would stop there after school and spend hours obsessively listening to them as they taught her all about the inner workings of whatever they were fixing.

Their son, though?

_Eh._

There wasn't anything wrong with him, exactly. She just wasn't sure what his deal was. He was either shy or snobby, because he never really bothered to talk to her. His dark hair was long enough to hang in his face, and it was always messy, as if he'd just woken up.

Rey had never really noticed him hang out with friends, and their mothers must have had a problem with that, because they kept arranging  _playdates_. But all Ben ever did when she got there was stammer, turn red, and then bury his head in a book.

In short, he was kind of weird, and boring as hell to hang out with. After almost a year of living next door to each other, she wasn't entirely sure how to act around him, and they didn't even chat at school (though, that may have been due to him being a grade ahead of her).

Actually, they'd never so much as acknowledged each other at school until, one day, when Rey had claimed the swing that went higher than the others, a group of sixth graders started mocking him. Rey jumped off the swing the minute she heard someone taunt him about his ears, because despite how unusual her not-really-a-friend was, she kind of thought his ears were adorable. Not that she'd ever admit it.

So, she stomped up and punched the offending sixth grader in the face.

Their friendship started the moment she turned and saw the awed expression Ben wore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to come chat on Tumblr - and feel free to prompt us. Apparently we're incapable of oneshots.
> 
> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)  
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	3. Treehouse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning, at some point this fic is going to very much earn an E-rating. In the meantime, I'm just having fun. Enjoy!

There was something breathtaking about waking up in bed next to Rey. She was using him as a pillow, and his heart skipped a beat when he realized they'd slept wrapped around each other.

God he'd missed her.

He missed how warm and bubbly she was (when she wasn't busy scaring the shit out of him), and he missed that stunning smile, and-

Okay, he probably shouldn't have missed her snark, especially considering the hell she'd already started putting him through. The night before, when they'd finally stepped out of the car after declaring some sort of truce, she'd walked up to his parent's front door and looked back at him with a shit-eating grin, demanding sweetly that he carry her over the threshold.

So he did, and then carried her right up to his room while she giggled and demanded to be put down. Just like last time.

A restful night's sleep later, and Ben still couldn't figure out how he was going to survive the week and all the stuff it was dredging up. It had taken barely a minute in her presence at that airport bar for him to absolutely regret screwing up what they'd had. Or, rather, what they could have had if he hadn't let his advisor, Professor Snoke, convince him to  _let the past die_. What a load of shit that'd been.

Ben sighed and looked back down at where Rey was still resting her head on his chest, and felt joy bubble up in him for the first time in a long time. At some point in the night she'd pulled her hair out of the buns it was in, and Ben took the opportunity to run his hands through her hair while he stared down at the freckles that covered her bare shoulder.

A memory of kissing each of those freckles on a hot summer day popped into his head, and he smiled softly.

"Ben?" she murmured, finally stirring from her slumber.

He tightened the arm that was around her, and grinned, taking the opportunity to say, "Good morning  _darling_." Then he noticed the look on her face and decided to tease, "How did you sleep, my wonderful fiancee _?"_

Oh yeah, he wasn't making it to the end of the week without being murdered or maimed, but it would absolutely be worth it.

"I'll let you get away with that," Rey grumbled, "if, -  _and only if_  - you get me coffee."

Ben hummed. "Deal."

Once she finally followed him down to the kitchen, it took her a half-hour and two cups of coffee before she started acting like a normal, non-hungover human being. In the meanwhile, Ben took every opportunity he could to hold her close and nuzzle her hair. Something in him was saying  _this probably isn't a great idea_ , but the overwhelmingly loud voice he chose to listen to was busy purring contentedly.

Rey had taken a seat at the table that was in the sunny breakfast nook, just across from his parents, and gestured for him to scoot in next to her (which he did happily). After her first cup of coffee, she'd started returning each touch with the same level of affection he'd been showering her in. She at least  _acted_  content in his arms, and Ben desperately tried not to blush when she leaned over to press a good-morning kiss to his cheek. Then she'd let out a soft little sigh and rested her head on his shoulder.

His parents were straight-up  _beaming_.

It was too perfect, and he realized far too late that something was bound to go horribly wrong.

Ben had just put his arm around her and pulled her close, so she was nestled against his chest, when his mother spoke up.

"So we're hosting the family lunch around 3PM. Nothing too big, but the caterers will be here a couple hours earlier," she explained. "Most of the wedding guests aren't invited. We just wanted to host something since Maz doesn't want a big rehearsal dinner. It'll mostly be close family - Luke said he'd be running late, but he'll be here eventually. Your brother said Finn got called into work, so I'm not sure he'll be coming."

"Oh," Rey said, turning her face up toward Ben. His parents probably weren't as good at speaking  _Rey_ , so they probably didn't notice the mischievous look in her eyes as she crooned, "A family lunch? Won't that be nice, darling? Can we do something like that for  _our_  wedding? I don't want anything  _too_  big, but," she paused, and her voice increased in sappiness by a magnitude of ten, "Oh,  _Ben_ , I just can't wait to be your wife."

_If only._

What. Where the  _hell_  had that come from? He hadn't seen her in years and suddenly his brain was warming up to the idea of marriage? What the  _fuck?_

Ben shook the thought from his mind and took a deep breath as he finally realized what her plan was. She was going to lay it on thick and see which of them threw up the white flag first. It was a very  _Rey_  thing to do.

Leia's face lit up at the mention of their wedding, and Ben bit back a groan as she said, "Oh that's so sweet. Have you started planning yet? And have you set a date?"

"I hope so," Han huffed, shooting them a wink, "Can't even keep their damn hands off each other. It's like you're still a couple of teenagers. Better to have the wedding before giving us a couple grandkids, don't you think?"

Rey didn't miss a beat, turning back to look at his parents, and Ben nearly died as she said, "I keep saying that too. I'm not sure we're ready for kids, but your son needs some reminding. It's like he's never even heard of condoms! But that's okay - I think he just really likes the idea of being a daddy." Then she added, in an innocent tone that was anything but, "He even asked  _me_  to call him that! It's so cute."

Something in Ben's brain fried and then promptly decided she could call him whatever the hell she wanted, and he was  _this_ close to beating his head against a wall when  _that_  particular thought crossed his mind.

After a moment Leia choked and coughed into her coffee mug, sputtering as Han's eyes froze open, more than likely in horror. Ben smacked a hand to his face and moaned, knowing full well she was going to make him regret asking her to  _play along_. When he finally met her eyes she was grinning.

Rey knew  _exactly_  what she'd done.

Lunch was going to be a fucking nightmare.

* * *

The morning passed uneventfully after Rey decided to crawl back into bed for a few more hours of sleep. Though, of course, she hadn't missed the opportunity to suggestively ask him to join her. In front of his parents. While grabbing his ass.

She'd nearly cackled at the deer-in-the-headlights face he'd made.

Still, he was nice enough to wake her up about an hour before the family lunch was scheduled to start, and she hopped in the shower in the attached bathroom they were sharing.

Rey did her best not to think of the sort of activities she'd been taking part in the last time she'd been in that shower. That was probably the oddest part of the situation - it was like a weird, awkward trip down the memory lane of her own sexual awakening.

A trip she wouldn't mind taking again.

 _Ugh._ She needed to have a serious talk with whatever part of her was responsible for  _those_  thoughts.

Taking a deep breath, she decided to focus on the more serious part of the situation.  _Han_. The man really was something of a father to her, and for the first time since deciding to get revenge, she wondered if Ben really deserved what she had planned. If she had a father like Han, she probably would have done whatever she could to make him happy, and wasn't that all Ben was trying to do?

On one hand, Ben had done something truly stupid and kind of awful. On the other...Han was ill, and Ben was just blindly grasping at straws trying to find a way to make up for the decade of time he could have been spending with the man.

In a weird way, she understood completely, but in the end she decided to let Ben suffer, because  _yes_  he absolutely  _did_  deserve it. Plus, it would be an awful lot of fun, and she'd probably only keep it up for a few days. As annoyed as she was, it was nearly impossible to be cruel to the owner of those warm brown eyes.

_So, suffering it is. For now._

Rey smiled as she walked out of the bathroom in a towel and toward a very pissed-off-looking Ben, who was sitting on the bed with his legs stretched out in front of him, hands laced together behind his head.

She absolutely didn't take a moment to glance over his arms in his tight gray t-shirt.

"Rey, about this morning," he said carefully, interrupting what was bound to be some sort of naughty daydream involving said arms, "you realize we're specifically trying  _not_  to give my father a heart-attack, right? Don't you think  _maybe_  implying that I like being called  _daddy_ might just be a bit too much? Our parents don't exactly need to know that shit. Also, where the fuck did that even come from?"

She huffed."Uh,  _you_ were the one who got us into this mess, so don't blame me for having some fun with it."

He hesitated for a moment, seeming to mull over her words, before smirking "Okay, fine. You know what, Rey? Game on. If you can have fun, so can I. We'll see who gives up first."

It surprised her for a moment, but then the idea of some sort of game of chicken with Ben became far too delicious to pass up.

"Oh,  _Ben,_  I'm so glad to hear you say that," she said sweetly. She turned her back to him, walking toward the closet to pick out a dress, and then oh-so-casually let her towel drop to the floor. She felt a surge of pride at the strangled noise that came from the bed behind her.

"Are you seriously getting changed right now?" he stammered. "While I'm sitting here?"

"We're engaged, remember?" She chuckled. "Plus, you've seen me naked before, this can't be a huge shock. And...aren't  _you_  the one who just said  _game on?"_

"That's a bit unfair," he choked, "don't you think?"

"Unfair?" Rey laughed. "No, unfair is the fact that you still have abs. And amazing hair.  _And_ you've probably gotten even better in bed, so I hardly think  _this_ is unfair."

She turned and noticed his confused expression. His eyes trailed down to her bare chest before snapping back up to her face. "Are- Are you hitting on me?"

Yes.

_No?_

Shit.

"Gosh Ben," she said innocently, "I'm just  _playing along._  Wasn't that the deal? And you know, if you think it's unfair, you're welcome to level the playing field."

 _Please._ He'd been gorgeous once he'd grown into his lankiness when they were teenagers, and now she was nearly drooling at the thought of all the muscles she felt every time they kept touching each other. The idea of seeing those muscles minus the shirt was... _appealing_.

Rey watched, amused as Ben tried and failed to look anywhere but in her direction.

 _Good_ , so she wasn't the only one affected.

After a moment he gave up and cleared his throat. "I'm gonna get some wine," he muttered to himself. "Maybe a bottle. Probably a bottle."

She snorted as he walked out of the bedroom, "See you in a bit darling!"

Ben let out a few choice swears under his breath on his way out, and Rey nearly died laughing when she realized he'd left while holding one of the pillows in front of his waist.

Oh,  _yeah,_ this was going to be fun.

* * *

Ben was mess.

He'd nearly run down the stairs to get out of his old bedroom, ditched the pillow as soon as possible, and when he arrived in the parlor (who even had those?) his father had given him a knowing look - not that he had a  _clue_  what Ben was actually dealing with - and poured him a glass of whiskey from a glass decanter.

It was a serious step up from wine, and while he'd never been much for alcohol, Ben downed the whole glass in one go.

"Wow," Han huffed. "That bad?"

"You have no idea," Ben groaned.

The man snorted and let out a barking laugh. "She worth it?"

Ben considered it for a moment before helping himself to another pour. He smiled, and said, "Probably."

"What do you mean,  _probably?"_  an amused, familiar voice behind him asked. Ben turned to see Poe rolling his eyes, "Don't even try to claim you aren't completely head over heels. It's Rey, we're not a bunch of idiots."

_Don't blush. Don't blush. Don't bl- Fuck._

Thankfully just before his adopted brother could notice the redness spreading across Ben's face, he greeted him with a bear-hug, muttering, "You know, you could have told us."

"Sorry, man," Ben replied sheepishly, "It, uh...it was kind of a sudden thing."

"Yeah, I'll bet," Poe winked.

Ben was just about to frown at that when she walked into the room, and his throat went dry.

Rey was wearing a burgundy wrap dress that looked stunning against her skin, and showed off her small (but incredible) curves. She smiled broadly at him, lighting up the room as she asked, gesturing to her dress, "What do you think? Rose loaned it to me."

He didn't know who the hell Rose was but if he ever met her he was going to kiss the woman. Ben cleared his throat and said softly, "Beautiful."

A hesitant look crossed her face just before she floated over and settled against him, letting him wrap her in his arms. "Oh, are we having whiskey?"

"You want a glass?" Han grunted, muttering, "My damn kids are drinking all my whiskey, but I'll make an exception for you."

Rey nodded, and Poe asked quietly, "Uh, Rey, should you be drinking that?"

Ben stiffened behind her, but she just shrugged. "Yeah, why not? I'm more of a vodka person, but this is good stuff."

"But aren't you…?" Poe trailed off, seeming confused.

That was when Rey realized he was gestuing toward her stomach.

 _Oh._   _Oh no._

"I'm not pregnant," she said quickly. "Like, really,  _really_  not pregnant."

"Oh," Poe said with surprise. "We just figured-"

"We?" Rey interrupted, "Wait, does everyone think I'm pregnant?!"

"Well, kid, you two  _did_  kinda show up and shock the hell out of us with a surprise engagement," Han explained, "Though, Leia and I figured you weren't after the uh... _things_  you said at breakfast. But some people might think it's a shotgun wedding."

She finally looked up at Ben, who looked absolutely horrified.

"Uh, darling," she said cautiously, doing her best not to reach up and strangle him for bringing this on them, "can we talk privately for a minute?"

He swallowed hard and nodded, following her out into the hall, where she immediately shoved him into a bathroom and closed the door behind them.

The minute they got inside he leaned against a white marble counter and turned to her, saying, "Shit, Rey, I'm so sorry, I never meant-"

"Oh shut up," she interrupted, "I'm not blaming you. I know you never meant for any of them to think we're-  _well."_ Rey blanched, and then choked the word, " _Expecting._ If it's anyone's fault, I guess it's mine for even mentioning kids."

"Actually I think my mother mentioned them first," Ben said dryly. "She's been bugging me to settle down and have kids for over a year now."

Rey moaned. "And now she thinks you have. That's... _oh_  that's just great." She sighed, and said, "Okay, here's what we're going to do. We're going to go spend half-an-hour talking to everyone, and then we're each going to grab a bottle of something, ditch this nightmare, call a truce for the evening, and meet up at the old treehouse. Sound good?"

The treehouse was surprisingly sturdy, considering how haphazardly Han and Chewie had built it, and it sat  _just_  far enough away from the house so that nobody would think to look for them there. Rey had a feeling she'd need to escape to it more than once before the week was through.

"That-" he hesitated, "That sounds brilliant. Fucking  _brilliant_. Oh my  _God_ , marry me."

Rey glared up at him and hissed, "That's what got us in this mess to begin with!" She smacked his shoulder and muttered, "Damn moron."

* * *

After multiple deep breaths, and a bit of a pep talk, Ben followed her back out into the house, and they headed in the direction of the dining room, where everyone had started to gather. They hadn't so much as sat down when Leia came over with a cheerful expression and said to Rey, "Sweetheart, could you help your mother and I in the kitchen?"

Ben frowned, distinctly remembering a mention of caterers, but didn't think much of it as Rey squeezed his arm. It was entirely possible that his suddenly-blanking mind could have had something to do with the way her hips swayed as she walked toward the kitchen.

"You're staring," Poe laughed, elbowing his arm.

Yes, he absolutely  _had_  been staring.

"I'm allowed to stare," he muttered.

Ben glanced over at the man he (regrettably) hadn't seen in years. Poe had let his hair grow out a bit, but other than that, and maybe a few laugh lines, the man hadn't changed.

Poe just smirked, and said, "Sure,  _now_ , but you did a lot of staring back in high school, too."

He was about to roll his eyes and bite back, (because  _obviously_ he'd noticed early on that his best friend was beautiful - he wasn't  _blind_ ), but then Rey stormed out of the kitchen, wide-eyed, as though she'd just seen a ghost or something.

"Uh…" Ben paused. "I'm going to go see what's wrong with my fiancee."

Rey looked in his direction as he stood up, and they took a few steps toward each other when she leaned up to whisper in his ear, "Your mother just handed me a book of baby names. I'm pretty sure I just got ambushed and I  _may_  have jokingly told them you want a bunch of children and apparently they quite like that idea, so I tried saying a  _lot_ of other things that should have gotten them off our backs but when I left they were debating on which of them would be a stay-at-home-grandma, and Ben, I can handle messing with you but the whole  _baby_  thing is actually starting to freak me out, and-"

"Okay, okay, calm down," he said gently, resting his hands on his shoulders. He glared back in the direction of the kitchen and growled, "Fucking hell, I'm going to need to have a talk with her. For now…" he looked back at Rey and gave her a sympathetic smile. "Treehouse?"

Rey seemed to let out a sigh of relief, and nodded. "I'll get your father's good whiskey."

* * *

Eighteen Years Earlier

It had taken a punch for Ben to  _finally_  get up the nerve to talk to her, and once it happened, he spent as much time as possible in her presence. At some point, maybe a few months later, his mother had convinced his father and their friend, Chewie, to build a treehouse in their backyard. Despite the nervous expression Rey wore the first time she climbed up, they ended up spending time there almost every day, dragging up board games, books, and cookies Maz baked for them.

It took mere months for them to become inseparable, so later that year, when Ben got sick, so did she. They both ended up spending a week out of school with whatever miserable congestion-inducing illness that was going around, and Ben decided to ask his mother if they could stay home together.

That way, he reasoned, Maz wouldn't have to stay home from work (apparently she wasn't comfortable leaving a sick and grumpy ten-year-old Rey home alone), and Rey could stay at their house since Han had already declared he'd be staying home to make sure Ben didn't burn the place down.

In the end, Leia had given him a knowing smile, made a phone call, and he and Rey had gotten to spend the whole week home from school hanging out. She was definitely better at board games than Maz had been, and Ben thought,  _maybe_  he'd fallen in love the minute she suggested they watch the  _Indiana Jones_  movies without even knowing they were his favorites.

By the time they got to the  _Temple of Doom,_ she'd fallen asleep with her head on his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to come chat on Tumblr - and feel free to prompt us. Apparently we're incapable of oneshots.
> 
> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)  
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	4. Ring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not going to lie, I wrote 90% of this while drunk and did most of my editing while still drunk, so I'm really not promising this isn't awful. Here's to hoping semi-drunk me is a relatively good writer. ALSO, this got a bit more explicit than I intended.

Han wasn't picky about much. He'd watch pretty much anything on tv (though he had a soft spot for Westerns), he'd eat pretty much whatever you put in front of him, and he'd get along with most people, as long as those people weren't easily offended.

Liquor was an entirely different story. Han bought  _good_  liquor, and Ben knew in his gut that he'd quite possibly throw a fit when he realized his half-full glass decanter of very nicely aged whiskey had magically disappeared.

It wasn't the first time Ben and Rey had nicked some of his parent's alcohol and gotten drunk, but he had a feeling this time probably wouldn't end with quite as much nudity.

Or maybe it would.

_Chill_ , he had to tell himself. They'd been drinking for less than an hour, sitting next to each other on the floor of the old treehouse they'd played in as children. They took turns passing the decanter back and forth until drinking straight whiskey didn't seem so bad (which really, should have been the sign to stop), and he'd already had to give himself multiple talks on why pinning her down and making out with her was a Bad Idea (™).

Or... _was it?_

He was too drunk to know.

"So," Ben started, in a tone that absolutely  _didn't_  imply that he'd gotten completely sloshed, "you gonna tell me I'm right?"

Rey scrunched up her face and waved a hand in his direction, probably trying to smack him, but ended up missing and giggling instead. "You're not! Right?  _Right?_  'Bout what?"

Oh, she was fucking  _cute._ Her nose was wrinkled up, and her smile was wide and bright, and the lipstick she'd chosen would look incredible on his dick and-

Wait. Fuck, he needed to stop thinking things like that.

He ignored those thoughts and paused, forgetting what he was going to say. "Nevermind," he mumbled, "are you done messing around now?"

"Never," she snorted, letting out another barking laugh as she lost her balance and slid to the side until she was leaning against him.

"Come on Rey, we could be having  _so_  much more fun," he reasoned. Then he lowered his voice and said, "Remember what we did last time we were in here?"

"Ben!" She let out another giggle. "Are you  _really_ suggesting-"

"I  _might_  be," he interrupted shyly, taking another long drink from the decanter. "What would you think if I was?"

Rey looked up at him and he could almost feel blood rushing south as a devious smile formed across her face. She laid a hand on his chest and trailed it downward, until it was less than an inch from where he wanted it. She leaned in, bit her lip (oh, yeah, he was a goner), and whispered, "I think…"

_Pleasesayyespleasesayyesplease-_

"Yeah?" Ben asked, his mouth suddenly dry.

She smiled a bit and continued, "I think...that's a great idea."

Something in him cheered, and started listing all the surfaces in the house that they hadn't yet christened. They had at least the week, and-

He had to catch his breath as he asked, "Do you really?"

"I do," she grinned. "But. We're not going to."

His heart dropped. Disappointment had never been so beautifully cruel.

"But-"

"We're not going to," she amended, "until you beg."

And all of the sudden, his heart was pounding again, and he realized she wanted him just as much as he wanted her. She just had better control, apparently.

_Not for long_.

"What if I get you to beg first?" Ben murmured into her ear, just before sucking the lobe into his mouth. He bit lightly on it and felt a surge of pride at the breathy noise she made.

Then Rey shocked the hell out of him by climbing into his lap, straddling his hips. She swung her arms around his neck and nuzzled her nose against his as she whispered, "You  _know_  I'll outlast you. You can try, but I think we both know who'll give in first."

She was grinding down onto him, and the skirt of her dress had slid up as she'd straddled him, revealing her tanned legs, dotted with freckles he'd once licked, kissed, and bit. Given the way his body was reacting to the situation, it was entirely possible that she was right.

Ben was way too drunk to resist her much longer, and he just  _couldn't_  give her the satisfaction of being right, so he cleared his throat and gently pulled her off his lap. "You're wrong," he chuckled. "And we should probably get back inside before they send someone to look for us."

She looked a little disappointed, but that slowly morphed into amusement as she said, "You know they're going to think we were having sex, right?"

"Fuck."

* * *

Rey had absolutely been right, and she struggled not to blush at each pointed and knowing look they received from everyone at dinner. Well, actually, they'd completely missed dinner, but the guests had piled into the parlor and were listening to Han bitch about a missing decanter-

_Whoops._

_-_  so, naturally, they all stopped and stared as soon as Rey and Ben entered the room together.

Thankfully, Han let out another string of swears as he continued to search for his favorite whiskey, and that seemed to break the awkward tension. Rey specifically avoided the knowing look her mother and Leia were giving them (dear  _God_  those women seemed bound and determined to get a few grandchildren), and instead, turned her direction to the man standing next to Poe.

"I thought Leia said you couldn't make it!" she gushed, wrapping the man in a hug.

"Hey peanut," he laughed, "I got someone to cover my shift at the last minute." Finn pulled back a bit from the hug and raised an eyebrow at her, "So uh...Solo, huh? How much is he paying you to pretend you're marrying him?"

Rey's jaw dropped.

Once her and Ben had lost touch, she'd made an effort to be more social, and Finn had been the friendly guy on her dorm's floor who'd become a good friend within weeks. Despite never having classes together, they saw each other every day, and he was one of the very few people who'd heard the whole story about her relationship with Ben. Of course, it had been shared over a bottle of something or other, but it had been one hell of a bonding experience.

Rey had brought him home for Thanksgiving during their Sophomore year since he couldn't afford to travel home just for a few days, and the minute she'd introduced him to Poe, they'd hit it off, and they'd been together ever since.

"Why would you think I have to pay her?" Ben asked, his voice a mix of amusement and curiosity, with a hint of annoyance.

Finn gave him a look that screamed  _Really, dude_ , and said, "I think, if you were actually together, we would have heard something about it before now."

Before she could refute Finn's claims, Ben smirked, and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close to him. "You really think we aren't together?" he asked, his voice a bit taunting, "Want me to tell you about this thing she likes me to do with my tongue?"

Oh dear  _Lord_ , how much had he had to drink?

Rey's eyes shot open wide as she glanced up at him and hissed, "Ben! This  _really_  isn't the time!"

"Oh, I think it's the perfect time, darling," he grinned. Then he looked back at Finn with that stupid fucking smile and said, "Seriously, you wouldn't  _believe_  how her toes curl."

The worst part was, he wasn't even making any of it up. Rey groaned and said, "Could you  _please_  not share the details of our sex life - past  _or present_ \- with family members? I can't believe I even have to say that."

Ben turned to smile sweetly down at her. "Oh but darling, what was it you were telling my parents?" Ben asked innocently. "Something about calling me... _daddy?"_

Fuck, she  _knew_  she'd end up regretting that.

He was going to  _pay._

A coughing noise came from Finn and Poe's direction, and Rey heard one of them mutter a curse or two. "Okay," Finn sputtered, "I was just teasing, you  _really_  didn't have to go that far."

Rey let out a frustrated exhale and glanced around the room, relieved to notice that nobody else seemed to have overheard their conversation. That was something, at least.

" _Darling_ ," she said lovingly, "Remember this moment when I'm smothering you in your sleep."

His lips curled up into a smile as he murmured, "With your breasts or a pillow?"

It was then that Rey knew she'd lost that round, because she genuinely couldn't think of a comeback she'd dare to say in a room of her family members.

Poe let out a hacking noise, and finally choked out, "Christ, okay, I'm getting another drink."

"I think I'll join you," she said dryly.

As she walked off, she noticed Ben wink, and she had a bad feeling that he might be just as good at teasing as she was.

* * *

Light streamed in through open curtains, landing on Ben, and rousing him from a deep sleep. He spent a moment cringing over the memories he had from the evening before - unless he was mistaken, he'd said some relatively embarrassing things in front of Poe and his boyfriend, then processed to get even  _more_ drunk, and…

Oh no.

At some point he'd absolutely thrown a similarly drunk Rey over his shoulder and carried her to bed, where they'd proceeded to strip and... _fall asleep._  Well, the  _sleep_  part was probably for the best, but carrying her over his shoulder like a fucking caveman in front of their parents  _might_  not have been a great plan.

He hadn't planned to drink so much, but after Leia had pulled him aside and thrust a ring box in his hands, once again scolding him for the lack of ring on Rey's hand, he just couldn't help himself.

And now... _now_ , he was curled around Rey, spooning her while naked.

He huffed. If someone had told him a week ago that he'd end up in bed naked with the girl who was effectively his childhood-sweetheart, he would have laughed at them. And yet, here he was, trying to figure out how to use the situation to his advantage.

Ben shifted against her and noticed immediately that he was hard, and pressed firmly against her bare ass.

_Oh,_  she was naked too.

His heart started pounding, and he cautiously pressed his lips to her shoulder, kissing her there until she made a throaty moan, and rocked back against him.

Fuck, she was awake.

Ben kissed a line up her neck and whispered into her ear, reminding her of what she'd insisted on in the treehouse, "First one to beg loses."

There was no fucking way he was going to lose the stupid little game she'd suggested, and his confidence in his odds of winning surged as she let out a soft whimper. He tightened the arm that was around her waist, and she gasped as he started slowly grinding his hips against her ass.

"I don't beg," she said breathily, between gasps.

_We'll see_ , he thought.

"What a pity," he chuckled. "I was just remembering how good it used to feel...me buried so deep in your tight little pussy, pulsing while you clenched around me…" he licked up the side of her neck, and bit down just enough to earn a soft whine from her. "Just say the word, Rey," he murmured. "Say the word and I'll fuck you so hard into this mattress that the neighbors will hear the sounds you make."

" _Fuck_ ," Rey hissed, melting into him as his hand came up to massage her breast, softly pinching one of her nipples.

"Is that what you want, darling?" He asked, smirking against the back of her shoulder.

_Please say yes._

He felt Rey take a deep breath and then she slowly pulled away, and disentangled herself from him. Then she climbed out of bed and looked back at him with wild eyes, stammering, "You'll- you'll be the one who begs first."

That was funny, since she seemed to be the one who was all riled up.

Ben snorted. "I guess we'll see."

* * *

It had taken her a good hour's worth of talking herself down in the bathroom mirror before Rey managed to walk out, ready to face Ben (and his parents) again. It was possible that she'd gotten herself off in the shower thinking of his hands on her breasts and his whispering in her ear, but she'd sure as hell never admit that.

When she went back out into the bedroom, Ben was gone, so she shuffled down the stairs and headed for the back of the house, in the direction of the sunny breakfast nook that looked out over the backyard.

"Oh, honey, you're up!" Leia greeted. "Ben said to send you out into the backyard."

Rey's eyes narrowed. "Oh? Why?"

"I think he just wanted to have breakfast with you out there." She leaned in for a conspiratorial whisper and said, "He set up a nice little breakfast spread for you two out at the picnic table. Han and I are going to eat in here. Give you two a bit of privacy."

_Perfect. Just what they needed,_  she thought sarcastically.

"Okay," Rey paused, "That's...nice. I guess I'll go get some breakfast."

Leia smiled a broad, sunny smile, and immediately Rey knew the woman wasn't telling her everything. But after being bombarded with neverending baby-related questions, stories, and suggestions (" _Rey, if you want a boy,_ this  _is the position I'd suggest trying!"_  - she'd nearly died of embarrassment right then and there), she wasn't all that excited about spending a lot of extra time around the woman.

So, she nodded, and left through the kitchen's screen door, pulling her sweater more tightly around her as the Fall breeze hit. Ben looked up from the picnic table when he heard the door shut behind her, and waved her over with a gleefully evil look on his face.

_Oh no_ , what was he planning?

Rey walked over cautiously, and took a seat across from him, asking suspiciously, "What's going on?"

"My parents are watching though the window, so try not to freak out," he said, sounding a little too cheery for as hungover as he should have been. "You said you'd play along, and it's only for the rest of the week."

"Ben," she growled, "what did you do?"

"Oh, I haven't done it yet," he laughed.

Then she watched with growing horror as he stood up and pulled a small box from his pocket, walked around the table, and-

"Don't you  _dare,"_ she hissed through a tight smile. "Ben Solo, I swear to God if you-"

Ben smirked and got down on one knee.

"Dammit Ben! That's too far! I'm going to murder you and cut you up into so many pieces they'll have to put you back together like a fucking 3D puzzle."

"Oh, you say the sweetest things, darling," he said in a smarmy voice. "You might want to smile. My parents are probably watching us through the window. And hey, you've been torturing me so nicely, this is the  _least_  I can do."

Rey glowered down at him, and pasted on a faux grin. "If you put that fucking ring on my finger you aren't getting it back."

One of his eyebrows raised, and he said in an amused voice, "You promise?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh fuck off, I didn't mean it like that."

His shoulders shook with silent laughter, and he took her hand, slowly sliding the ring onto her finger. He paused for a few minutes, and let out a soft huff of air while considering her hand carefully. When he looked back up at her, he was wearing a surprisingly serious expression.

"It looks good on you," he said softly.

Was she still breathing? Rey wasn't entirely sure. All she could think of was his dark eyes, and the way he still held her hand, and the way she desperately wanted to kiss him again.

"I- uh," she cleared her throat. "Yeah. Well, a ring like this would look good on anyone."

"I didn't put it on just  _anyone_ ," he murmured, before standing back up. "Uh, yeah, they're definitely watching…" he said awkwardly, running a hand through his hair.

She stood up, and the words spilled from her lips before they had a chance to stop them.

"Then you should probably kiss me."

Ben's eyes flicked down to hers and for a second she wondered if she'd gone too far. But then... _oh_ , then his hand came up to tentatively cup her cheek, and he leaned down slowly, as if asking permission to continue.

Rey took in a quick breath as his thumb gently ran over her bottom lip, and before he had the chance to, she leaned up on her toes and pressed her lips to his. He seemed to hesitate for a moment, but then he groaned against her and she let her mouth open just enough for his tongue to slide against hers, and suddenly he took control, devouring her slowly and thoroughly, as if he desperately needed to memorize her lips and mouth.

They hadn't kissed in ten years, but in an instant, Rey was eighteen again, standing on her front porch, being kissed by the only person in the world who'd ever kissed her like this - like she was was the only woman he ever wanted to kiss. Almost…almost like he loved her.

Oh, how she wished that was true.

* * *

Seventeen Years Earlier

Rey knew something was off when Ben didn't show up to school one day, maybe a few weeks after her eleventh birthday. She knew he wasn't sick, because they'd just spent the evening before playing Scrabble in the treehouse and he'd seemed fine. He hadn't mentioned anything about a doctor's appointment, or dentist, or family visiting, or really anything that might have caused him to miss school, so she was kind of concerned.

Plus, school  _sucked_  without Ben. Sure, she had a few people in her own grade that she was friendly with, but for some reason a lot of them avoided Ben, and she just didn't  _get_  people who didn't think he was great. Because, well, Ben was the  _best_. He was the best friend she could have ever imagined - always there to play a game, watch a movie, or just sit and listen to her complain about whatever nightmarish day she'd had.

They'd realized pretty quickly that their bedroom windows faced each other, and after lots of insistence, Leia had bought them each a whiteboard and markers so they were able to leave messages up for each other. His messages were always short (mostly just limited to "Hi!" or "Movie?") and written in gorgeous handwriting, while hers were longer and realistically, a total mess compared to his.

That day, when she got home from school, she ran up to her room to see if he'd left her a message. In lovely calligraphy, she saw the word "treehouse".

Six minutes later, she Rey was climbing the ladder with a backpack filled with Maz's cookies, a jug of lemonade, and a few books she'd been meaning to loan him. She slung the backpack onto the floor and peeked her head into the small room.

"Ben?"

She heard sniffling coming from a corner, and she immediately scrambled over to him, sat down, and wrapped him in her arms. He held her tightly, burying his head into the nape of her neck.

"What's wrong?" she asked softly.

Ben sighed and pulled back a bit, saying, "It's silly."

"If you're upset, it's not silly."

He took a deep breath and explained that his parents were taking in a boy whose mother had worked for Leia. The boy's parents had died in a terrible car accident, and he didn't have any family who could take him in.

"His name is Poe," he said quietly.

Rey hesitated. Being adopted herself, she had a very different understanding of the situation, so she said carefully, "What's upsetting you about it?"

"What if…" Ben paused, and whispered, "What if he doesn't like me? Kids don't usually like me. What if he hates me and we don't get along? Or, what if my parents like him more? What if  _you_  like him more?"

Huh. That was not at  _all_  the reaction she'd expected. "Oh. Ben, that's…" she bit back a giggle, and said, "Ben, that's ridiculous. How could anyone not like you? And," she hugged him a bit tighter, "you're my best friend. Poe could be the coolest, smartest, most amazing guy  _ever_ , and you'll always be my best friend."

"Really?" he breathed.

She smiled softly. "Always. I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	5. Shower

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While fluffy, this chapter ended up with a bit more of a serious tone. At some point, the characters had to start addressing their feelings (at least to themselves). The next chapter will be a bit more funny.

_Breathe._  She just needed to breathe.

But really, how on  _earth_  could she be expected to after Ben  _fucking_ Solo had gotten down on one knee, put a gorgeous ring on her finger, and then looked at her like he'd suddenly decided it was the best decision he'd ever made?

 _Wow_ did she need to stop projecting.

Not five minutes after the kiss that had left her weak in the knees, she'd made an excuse to leave, and she'd nearly run to Finn and Poe's house. Luckily they were less than a mile away and she'd happened to have her sneakers on, so it had really just turned into a nice walk in the cold air.

It was exactly what she needed to clear her mind, and yet, it just left her more confused.

 _What was she doing?_  Was she  _really_  going to let Ben break her heart all over again?

 _One week_ , she reminded herself. Actually, it was less than that now. One week, and they'd go back to being on opposite sides of the country, and why the hell would she think, even for a second, that he'd stay in touch this time?

The confused ranting that was going on in her mind stopped the minute she saw the adorable little yellow cottage, its walkway littered with the orange and red leaves that made fall so beautiful. Lovely, well-trimmed bushes wrapped around the front of the house, and the property even had a white-picket fence.

It was as perfect and non-complicated as the relationship of the two men who lived inside, and Rey adored it, and them.

She paced in front of it for a moment before opening the gate and stalking up to the door, knocking before she could change her mind.

A minute or two, and a couple of extra knocks later, Poe swung open the door, smiling broadly when he saw her. "Hey, what's up?" he asked, clearly happy to see her. "Didn't bring the fiance?" he paused, and scrunched up his face, "Oh, wow, that's weird to say."

"You have no idea," Rey drawled. "Do you and Finn have a while to talk? I'm losing my mind here."

His forehead creased, concern seeping into his expression. "For you? Of course." Poe stood back, sweeping his arm into the room, gesturing for her to enter.

* * *

"So, wait," Finn interrupted, a good thirty minutes later. "You're telling me I was  _right?"_

Rey cringed a bit. She'd spent half the walk debating over whether or not to talk to someone about what had been going on, and now that she was... _feeling_  things, she needed to have some sense talked into her. So, she'd sat down on a cozy chair across from Finn and Poe in their bright, cheery living room. They'd obviously both noticed how freaked out she was (Finn had promptly handed her a mimosa,  _bless him_ ), and Rey had promptly spilled her guts.

"Well, yeah, but he's not paying me," she admitted. "And you guys  _can't_  tell anyone."

Poe snorted, "So what you're saying is, Finn was right, except you somehow got a  _worse_  deal than he'd expected?"

"I guess," she shrugged. Rey let out a groan, and buried her head in her hands. "You guys don't understand though, I thought I'd stopped feeling this stuff  _years_ ago, but  _god_ , suddenly he gets down on one knee and I feel like I'm falling apart all over again."

 _Falling in love_  was probably more like it, but Rey ignored that voice.

"He got down on one knee?" Poe asked curiously.

Rey nodded, explaining, "Yeah, that's actually what made me come here. This was such an impromptu thing that I never had a ring, and apparently Ben thought it would be appropriate to give me one, at least for the week." She held out her hand, displaying the sparkly diamond that was probably worth more than a few months' rent at - well, actually, it wasn't really her apartment anymore.

 _Shit_ , she still needed to figure that out. No way in hell was she going to live with Snap again.

"Holy crap," Poe breathed. "That's his grandma's ring."

Finn glanced over at him and frowned as Rey asked, "It is?"

"Yeah," Poe nodded. "Wow, I...okay, honestly I'm a bit surprised he did that. That, uhm...hm."

"Welcome to my hell," she finally said, throwing her head back to rest on the top of the chair she sat in. " She let out a bit of a whine and said, "Guys, what do I do?"

They were both quiet for a moment and when Rey finally lifted her head back up to look at them, it became clear that they were both hesitating to say something.

"What?"

Poe opened his mouth to respond, but closed it just as quickly, and looked away.

Rey's eyes narrowed. "What is it?"

"It's just…" Finn started, "Peanut, it's pretty obvious, isn't it?"

 _Yes,_ it was, but dear  _lord_  she couldn't say it.

"I'm not sure what you-"

"You love him," Poe interrupted. "And I'm guessing you're finally realizing you never stopped loving him, and all this pretending is just stirring all of that stuff up, and now you're a mess because you think this is all just a game for him. How close did I get?"

 _Spot on_.

Her mouth went dry, and she blinked for a few moments before muttering, "Pretty close."

Their expressions softened, and Finn reached out and took her hand. "You've gotta tell him, Peanut," he said carefully.

"I can't," she whispered. "Last time...Finn, you weren't there last time. When he left. I can't go through that again."

"I think you should tell him. I think you'll regret it if you don't," Poe added in. "I...okay, Rey, I really doubt this is just some sort of game for him."

Rey shook her head, and said in a more determined voice. "I can't. It's less than a week. I can pull it together. It's just a few more days."

Finn gave her a sympathetic look an said, "Yeah but Peanut, then you're going to be heartbroken."

She cleared her throat, and plastered on a smile, lying through her teeth, "I'll be fine."

* * *

Ben knew he'd crossed a line. Just seconds after their kiss, she'd turned white as a ghost and made up an excuse to leave, not really even stopping to tell him where she was going, or how long she'd be gone. Not that she was obligated to do so, but…

 _Shit,_ he'd really screwed up.

Just...his heart had started pounding the moment he'd gotten down on the ground and looked up at her, and it had felt so  _real_. He'd been so terrified when they were kids, but now?  _Now_  he wished he'd been asking for real.

Wow, when had that happened?

He knew he'd had feelings for Rey. Strong, intense feelings, and it's not like he hadn't considered marrying her before (after all, he'd been brave enough to suggest a marriage pact at one point), but for some reason it felt so overwhelming now, but, in a good way. Maybe it hadn't at nineteen because  _marriage_  had felt like such a far off event, but now…

He'd marry her tomorrow if she'd have him.

A plan hatched in his mind, and it hit Ben all at once. He had just over half a week. He'd use the time he had left to convince her, and with any luck, she'd still be wearing the ring when the week was over. Sure, there was the fact that they still lived in completely different parts of the country to consider but...but it was  _Rey._  She'd slipped away once, and there was no way he'd let it happen again.

Much to his dismay, she didn't arrive home until after 8PM, mentioning that she'd spent the day catching up with Finn. Of course, Ben had gotten roped into helping Han and Chewie set up a large white-curtained canopy tent for the wedding that was happening in the Solo-Organa's large backyard the next day. Just his luck, it had started raining not ten minutes later, and he'd grumbled and bitched his way through the day, counting the unknown amount of minutes until she came back.

When Rey finally arrived drenched from the downpour, he'd met her right at the entry, noticing right away that she looked exhausted. He'd kissed her forehead, and after a brief moment of hesitation, she melted into the hug he'd offered.

There was something incredible about having her in his arms, even if she was soaking wet from the rain.

"My parents went out for dinner," he said quietly, running his hand soothingly over her back, "Can I make you something?"

She sighed, and nuzzled into him, mumbling sleepily, "I already ate. Think I'm just going to take a shower and get some sleep."

"Okay," he nodded. Idiot that he was, he then decided to press his luck, and said with a slight smirk, "Want some company?"

She inhaled sharply, and looked up at him with an indefinable expression before returning his smirk, and calling his bluff. "Yeah, sure."

* * *

Rey's heart pounded all the way up the stairs. She started pulling off her knit sweater the moment the bedroom door closed behind them, and she almost jumped when a pair of strong hands replaced hers, gliding up as they gently removed her sweater and the tank-top she wore underneath.

He stood behind her, and the same hands wrapped around her waist, unbuttoning and unzipping her jeans as a painfully slow pace, carefully easing them down her body. His hands -  _fuck_  those were big hands - lightly grasped her shins, and slid up the front of her legs until they arrived at the plain black panties she'd thrown on that morning.

Had she known someone else would end up undressing her,  _maybe_  she would have gone with something else, but Ben didn't seem to mind, because he murmured in an appreciative voice against her shoulder, "Is this okay?" just as he ran his fingers along the upper edge of the underwear she wore.

"Yes," she gasped, wondering when her heartbeat had picked up to match the pitter-patter of the rain on the roof.

Ben chuckled, and whispered into her ear, "And are you going to beg?"

"Not a chance," she breathed.

Rey turned to face him, and swallowed hard when she saw the dark glimmer in his eyes. She caught her breath and lifted her hands to his shoulders, trailing them down to his waist. She returned the favor, and grasped the hem of his black, long-sleeved shirt, lifting it up. He ducked and let her pull it over his head, and Rey practically had to stop her mouth from watering as she saw his familiar sculpted shoulders and chest.

Ben watched her with hungry eyes as she bit her lip, and unhurriedly unbuttoned his pants, kneeling in front of him and she slid them off his legs.

A voice in the back of her head made a few lewd comments about the fact that she was on her knees in front of him, but she pushed them out of her mind.

"It's just a shower," she said cautiously. "Unless  _you_  ask for more."

Suddenly, she hated her competitive streak.

* * *

_Just a shower_.

As if.

But he just nodded, and grasped her waist, lifting her into his arms as he kicked his jeans off the rest of the way. She blinked, and hesitated for a moment before he put an arm under her, and helped her wrap her legs around his waist.

Ben had an ulterior motive now, and if he had it his way, it'd be far more than  _just a shower_.

So he wrapped his hand around the back of her head, pulling her to him so he could meet her in a slow, passionate kiss that hopefully said everything he needed to say. She gasped into his mouth as she folded her arms around his neck, drawing their bodies closer. Ben held her tightly in place, her undoubtedly wet center pressing against him.

After a moment he remembered they were supposed to be showering, and the idea of getting her even  _more_  wet was more than a little appealing, so he carefully walked them into the adjoining bathroom, only letting go with a single hand so he could start the shower.

When the water warmed up, he lowered Rey to her feet and silently asked permission to undress her the rest of the way. She flushed, and nodded, and as he leaned down to press another kiss to her lips, he unhooked her bra, slid each strap down inch by inch, and let it fall to the floor. He sucked her lower lip into his mouth and worked it gently with his teeth as he relieved himself of his own boxers, and let Rey wriggle out of the scrap of clothing she still had on.

Their kiss only ended when they both stood in front of each other, bare, chests heaving as they each stared.

Her skin was still covered in freckles, and her nipples were that gorgeous dusky pink (he'd never seen a color that could rival that), and-

"You're so beautiful," Ben blurted.

Rey blinked, and let out a soft giggle. "So, uh…" she turned even more red, "shower?"

He smiled and nodded.

Originally, Ben had assumed the shower might... _lead_   _somewhere_ , but once they got under the water, Rey gave him this  _look_  that just made him want to wrap her in a hug and keep her there. He wasn't sure what was on her mind, but it was clear that she needed comforting.

So that's what he did. He moved her under the water, helped wet her hair, and massaged shampoo into her scalp, just like he'd done so many years before. He soaped up a washcloth and slid it all over her body, trying to keep his mind from blanking every time he noticed how small she seemed in his hands.

She was  _perfect._

Rey sighed and relaxed into him, letting him rinse the shampoo from her hair, and turn her so he could carefully massage her back. A whimper rose in her throat as he reached a particularly bad knot near her shoulders, and he diligently worked it until it lessened, pressing a light kiss to the spot when he was done.

"Thank you," she said quietly.

He smiled against her skin and wrapped his arms around her waist in a hug, "Happy to do it. Rough day?"

"You could say that," she whispered.

Ben nuzzled his nose into the nape of her neck and asked, "Want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "Not really." She sighed and turned in his arms, pressing her chest to his, "What I really want is to get some sleep, and apparently I sleep best when you're my pillow."

He'd never get another restful night's sleep without her.

After a quick pause, Ben grinned, and said, "That sounds doable."

* * *

They'd stayed under the water in an embrace until it turned cold enough to make Rey gasp. She'd finally commented that it was probably time to get out, and she hadn't hesitated to grab the fluffy blue towel Ben held out to her.

Rey had dried off quickly, and had nearly started shaking from cold when she walked out of the steamy bathroom and into the bedroom, which suddenly felt like an icebox.

Thank goodness Ben was basically a furnace.

She shuffled over to her luggage and pulled on the single pair of cozy sweatpants she'd brought, along with her favorite sweater. It was dark navy, and had the name of a college she'd never visited on it, and it was  _far_  too big on her, but it was easily her favorite item of clothing.

"Is that mine?" Ben asked curiously.

"It used to be," she huffed. "I've had this for ten years, there's no way in hell you're getting it back now."

He chuckled, and said, "No, you can keep it, I just…" he hesitated, and said softly, "I didn't know you had it." He'd already laid down on his side of the bed, and pulled back some blankets, gesturing for her to join him. "C'mon, you look like you're about to freeze to death."

"I  _feel_ like I'm about to freeze to death," she muttered, climbing into bed next to him.

Ben welcomed her into his arms, and after a moment, she closed her eyes, rested her head on his chest, and listed to his heart beat as he carefully detangled her hair with his fingers.

"You're my best friend, you know," he whispered into the dark room.

And  _oh_ , that shouldn't have hurt, but it sent sharp barbs into her heart.

Because, Rey wanted so much more than that.

"Yeah," she choked. She cleared her throat and repeated, "Yeah, you're mine, too."

* * *

Sixteen Years Earlier

Ben's dad's old van (lovingly nicknamed "The Falcon" for whatever reason) screeched to a quick halt in front of the local movie theater - a little run-down building that only had six screens and half as many employees.

"I'll be back in a couple-a hours," Han said, giving the kids a quick wave as they stepped out of the van. "Got enough cash for popcorn?"

Poe smiled, saying, "Leia left us some!"

Han nodded once, and gave a final wave goodbye before driving off.

Poe turned to Ben and Rey, his smile growing more mischievous than Ben liked the look of. "So," he said, "I know we said we'd see  _Chamber of Secrets_ , but…"

Cold fall air whipped around them, and Ben noticed Rey shiver in a thin fleece pullover. His instinct was to hug her and help warm her up, but lately... _lately_  he'd felt a bit nervous about stuff like that.

"...personally," Poe continued, " _I_  think we should see  _The Ring_. I mean, we've all read the books, there's no  _way_  the movie will be as good, so why not see something else?"

Ben bristled at the thought. Horror movies weren't exactly his forte, and while he'd grown unexpectedly fond of his new adopted brother in the last year, the guy had a knack for getting the three of them into trouble.

"Poe, I don't think they'll even let us buy tickets for it," Rey piped in.

He sighed, relieved that Rey agreed.

Then she added, "It looks really cool, though." After sighing, she pointed to the poster, "It's PG-13. You guys could go, but I don't think they'll let me in."

"How about this," Poe suggested. "We buy tickets for Harry Potter, and sneak into the other theater."

Ben looked nervously at Rey, and saw her considering the idea.

 _Oh no_.

"That could work," she agreed.

Rey led the way into the ticket-line, but Poe caught Ben's shoulder and held him back for a minute, saying quietly, "Hey, trust me, you're gonna thank me for this." Then he winked, and followed Rey, leaving Ben wondering what the hell he'd meant.

Ben figured it out during the first anxiety-inducing scary scene, when Rey jumped and grabbed his hand.

He blinked, and turned to her, whispering, "Are you scared?"

"Yeah," she whispered back, "aren't you?"

A moment later, Ben glanced down at her hand, holding his tightly, illuminated ever so slightly by the light from the screen. Suddenly the movie wasn't nearly as scary as real life.

"Yeah," he said softly. "Terrified."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	6. Fireworks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh, two chapters in one day, apparently? Also, here's more drunk writing. Equilibrium is making for a rough week, so enjoy the fluff!

Ben found it impossible to leave the bed the next morning, and while he laid on his back, propped against a few plush pillows, he found himself staring down at the most beautiful woman he’d ever known.

While counting her freckles for the billionth time, he made two decisions.

One was insane and incredibly risky.

He was going to propose by the end of the week. For real.

Rey would probably laugh in his face, hand him the ring back, and curse at him a few times for being such an idiot when they were teenagers. He gave that outcome a ninty-five percent probability.

But that other five percent?

_ Well. _ That had Rey beaming with joy, nodding excitedly as they agreed that the ring would stay put. It had him marrying his best friend - the woman he’d apparently been in love with for most of his life. They’d buy a house (maybe nearby), settle down,  _ maybe _ consider fulfilling their parents’ wishes to be grandparents (though, that was a hard  _ maybe _ ), and Ben would never have to fall asleep without her again.

The other decision was a lot less nuts - he’d never leave her alone again. But, not in a stalker-ish way. If he could have gone back in time and scared the living crap out of younger-him before the idiot up and left, only to cut her out of his life entirely, that would have been his first option. 

Unfortunately, time travel hadn’t been invented yet, so Ben was stuck between wondering if he’d be wedding planning, or planning trips to visit her in Chicago.

One way or another, he’d do what he could to keep her in his life.

For now, though, he had to get up and dress for the wedding, no matter how much he wanted to be her pillow for a few more hours.

“Rey?” he said quietly, not wanting to scare her awake. “Darling?”

She groaned and cuddled closer, and a devious plan came to mind.

Rey was ticklish.

He gently slid his hands up under his own sweater that she’d apparently stolen at some point, and began tickling at the sides of her stomach. Within seconds her eyes had snapped open, and she started thrashing, letting out gasps and giggles that had him cackling. 

“Ben!” She wheezed, bursting out into another round of giggles, “Gonna- kill- you!”

“You can try, darling.”

She batted at him as he continued to tickle, and once she got a good swat in, he rolled over on top of her, straddling her hips while he grasped her wrists in his hands, pulling them over her head.

Ben noticed her breath catch in her throat as her chest heaved under his sweater, pupils dilated so wide her eyes looked black. She was flushed, and,  _ oh… _

It probably shouldn’t have taken him so long to realize that his actions essentially amounted to foreplay. He smirked at her reaction and leaned down over where she was pinned beneath him, capturing her lower lip with his teeth, and sucking it into his mouth.

Her breathing picked up and Ben used his free hand to slide the sweater she wore up her front until it was up around her chest, then grazed his hand over one of her breasts. Rey sucked in a breath as he circled his finger around her nipple and he bent down to lick a trail around the path his finger had traced.

Rey let out a moan, “Ben,  _ yes _ .”

“Should I keep going?” he whispered.

“Absolutely,” she breathed.

He smiled against her chest and said in a low voice, “Do you plan on begging me?”

_ That _ was when she let out soft whine. “ _ Ben _ , you can’t just tease me like this.”

“Oh, I can’t, can I?” he laughed, moving over to the breast he’d been neglecting, and started lathering and sucking at the dusky pink nipple that had hardened so nicely. He murmured against her, “Kinda seems like I can, Rey.”

“ _ Ben Solo _ , if you don’t-”

“Alright, alright,” he chuckled, pulling back. He cupped her face in his hand as he sat back, making sure to be mindful of his weight on her, and stared down into her eyes while he said in a husky voice, “Just know, I’ll have you by the end of the week, darling.”

“I’m sure,” she purred. “Just as soon as you get on your knees and ask nicely.”

He snorted. “Rey, if I’m on my knees I’ll be doing something other than talking.”

She blushed even further at that, and Ben couldn’t stop himself from grinning. A moment later, he sighed. “Unfortunately, I can’t stay in bed all day. I told dad I’d pick up our suits, and I think  _ you _ have to get to Maz’s.”

“Oh, right,” Rey groaned, “Maid-of-honor duties. Hopefully she’ll be so wrapped up in wedding stuff she’ll forget to ask me if I’ve gone off birth control yet. Would you believe her and your mother have asked me that half a dozen times already?”

Ben snickered. “Thankfully dad seems like he doesn’t want to hear anything else about potential future grandchildren.” He paused, and thought for a moment, “Uh, not to make things awkward, but just so I know, are you on-”

“Definitely,” she interrupted. “Have been since, uh,” she grinned, and turned her head to the side shyly. “Well, since we started…”

“Ah. Well, I bet Maz had some questions about that,” he laughed. 

Rey scrunched up her nose. “Actually I think she knew.”

_ Oh no. _

“No,” he whispered, “You’re  _ kidding _ , right? She  _ knew? _ You don’t think she told my parents, do you? I mean, I guess it doesn’t really matter  _ now _ , but do you really think she knew we were having sex?”

“She totally knew,” Rey cracked up, “Remember that time when we were in the treehouse and it was shaking so badly we got freaked out and moved things to my room? You must have left your boxers there or something, because when she did the laundry she handed them to me and she said ‘Give these back to Solo and remind him I used to change his diapers.’”

Ben smacked a hand to his face and groaned. “Oh my God. That’s so awkward.”

“Well, now she thinks we’re getting married,” Rey shrugged. “I’m not sure it matters now.”

He looked down at her and smiled for a moment, then leaned back down and planted a soft, chaste kiss to her lips. “Alright, darling, I should go.”

Rey nodded, and watched as Ben reluctantly climbed off her. He walked over to the dresser, where he’d stacked his clothing, and pulled on a pair of jeans. A minute later he turned and said, “Oh, I forgot, I’ll actually see you before the wedding.”

She propped herself up on her elbows after pulling the sweater back down a bit, and tilted her head questioningly.

“Since you and Maz are the only women in the wedding party, and Maz decided to do her hair herself, she asked if I’d braid yours.”

Rey blinked. They’d been kids when she’d convinced him to let her teach him how to braid. Maz was awful at it, thought she tried, and Leia was always so busy. She hadn’t bothered asking Han, and it had only taken about a minute of convincing before Ben had finally caved. After a while, he’d become surprisingly good at it, his nimble fingers able to weave her hair in ways she hadn’t thought of.

He frowned at her hesitation. “Is that okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” she said quickly, “I’m just surprised you still know how.”

“Well, it has been over ten years,” he paused, and admitted shyly, “I’ve only ever braided your hair, so hopefully it comes out okay.”

She smiled broadly, “I’m sure it’ll be great.”

* * *

Less than an hour later, Ben returned to the house with the suits and made his way past a bunch of hired workers who were busy setting up in the kitchen. The plan was to host the wedding and reception in the backyard so the caterers could have the house to work out of, and with any luck, the weather would allow for the outdoor wedding. If they had to move it inside, things were going to get cramped. No matter how large the house was, Maz and Leia had invited so many mutual friends, the near-castle would be bursting from its seams.

He made his way up the back staircase and knocked on his parent’s bedroom door, waiting for his father to open up. Rey and his mother had likely already gone to Maz’s to get ready, and he was left to have awkward alone time with Han and Chewie.

Ben knocked again, saying, “Guys, I’ve got the suits!”

After a minute, Chewie opened the door. The man’s bushy beard had, for once (and likely upon Maz’s insistence), been neatly trimmed, and his eyes shone as the ridiculously tall man smiled down at Ben. “Benny!” he greeted, “Good to see you, kid!”

To Ben’s complete non-surprise, the man wrapped him in a bone-crushing hug as he managed to grunt out the words, “Hey, Uncle Chewie.”

“Probably should back off the _ Uncle, _ ” the man barked in amusement, “Now that you’re marrying my girl. Probably outta start callin’ me  _ dad _ .”

“Hey, that’s my name,” Han griped from inside the room. “Ben, stop messing around in the hall and get in here.”

Chewie laughed and let Ben pass by him into the room. He hadn’t seen his parent’s bedroom in years, but it hadn’t changed a bit. The room itself probably would have seemed massive if it hadn’t been so filled. Family pictures lined every wall, and opposite the California-King four-poster bed was a sitting area - nearly a mini-living room. In one corner, his mother had set up a small office, and the floor was covered with intricate oriental rugs, giving the room a bit of a cozy feel.

“C’mon over here kid,” Han ordered, shoving a glass of amber liquid into his hands. 

_ Guess we’re starting early. _

“Are we toasting?” Ben asked, glancing over at Chewie.

Han snorted, “No, kid, we’re drinking. Every man’s gotta’ drink on his wedding day. It’s the best way to get through it. You’ll figure it out soon.”

Chewie just let out another chuckle and grabbed his suit, leaving the room to change, and Han’s face turned serious as he grabbed Ben’s shoulder.

“Look, kid,” he said in a gravely tone, “I’m not good at the serious stuff, but somebody’s gotta say it. I know we don’t always see eyes to eye, but,” he paused, and swallowed another gulp of whatever they were drinking, “but kid, I’m proud of you, okay? I know you’ve loved that girl for a long time, and I know you fucked it up there for a bit, but I’m proud that you worked it out.”

Ben’s throat went dry, and he listened in silence as his father continued.

“Rey- well, that girl’s been like a daughter to me. You know that. Started working at the garage as a kid - Chewie and I taught her how to drive for chrissakes. You and Poe are my boys, but Rey…” he smiled softly, “Rey’s my girl. And now she’ll be my kid for real, and,” he sniffed, and his voice got gruff again, “Well, hell, I can die happy. I just hope I make it to see your wedding.”

He truly thought he couldn’t have dug the hole any deeper, but somehow, Ben found a way.

“Yeah, dad,” Ben choked, once he’d collected herself, “You will. We’re not putting it off. Don’t worry. I think we’re looking at this winter.”

* * *

Rey was on her fifth drink when Ben finally showed up.

She was becoming a total lush, and it was entirely thanks to the Solo-Organas. First, Ben had the utter  _ nerve _ to decide they should  _ pretend _ that everything she’d ever wanted had suddenly become fact, and then, her apparent future-mother-in-law ( _ whoa _ ) had started in on the idea of grandchildren.

Did Rey know what the optimal time in her cycle was for getting pregnant?

Well, she did now.

Did Rey know that stress could lower her chances?

Nope, but if so, talking to Leia could have been a new form of birth control.

Long story short, Maz had noticed Rey’s internal panic rather quickly, and the angel had shoved a bottle of champagne into her hands. She’d probably intended for Rey to mix it with the orange juice she’d left out on the counter, but  _ fuck that _ .

Rey had ignored the juice completely and decided to drink straight from the bottle. Leia, lovely woman that she was, had continued prattling along about  _ all the babies _ Rey would carry for Ben-

_ Dear God, send help. _

-and she didn’t seem to notice that her future daughter-in-law was getting shitfaced off expensive champagne.

Ben noticed though, and he nearly laughed his ass off when he arrived.

“Shit,” he laughed, “I think our parents are going to make us into alcoholics.”

“Too late,” Rey groaned, taking another long swig from the bottle.

He’d arrived about an hour after she’d put her dress on. Thankfully she’d had the sense to do that  _ before _ starting in on the champagne, and she’d been thrilled to find that her mother hadn’t chosen to put her in the typical nightmarish dress many women pick for the members of their wedding parties.

Instead, it was a simple rosy pink, strapless, with a sweetheart neckline. Maz had even found one with  _ pockets _ , and Rey was in heaven when she found out.

“You look beautiful,” he whispered into her hair.

Leia and Maz were getting ready in Maz’s bedroom, and Rey had ditched them (with her bottle), closing herself in her old bedroom, which Maz hadn’t really changed. A full-sized bed sat in one corner, and most of the rest of the room was filled with bookcases.

Rey sat at her old desk and let her head fall back so she could look up at Ben. “Are you gonna’ braid my hair now?” she asked, in a voice she hoped sounded more sober than she was.

Ben snorted and placed a kiss at her hairline. “I will if you stay still.”

“Mmm. Yes, please,” she sighed, “I love your fingers.  _ Such  _ good fingers.”

“Oh wow,” Ben laughed, “you’re  _ so _ drunk. Go ahead Rey, tell me more about my fingers.”

“I’m not drunk,” she corrected him, just before hiccuping. Rey frowned, and took another drink. “Okay, maybe a bit.” 

“A  _ little _ bit?” 

Rey smirked, then moaned as she felt his fingers brush through her hair, and begin to section it into pieces for whatever braid he was planning.

“Go ahead and tell me more about my fingers, darling,” he said, thoroughly amused. 

She hummed, and said, “It’s not just your fingers. Your hands are fucking  _ huge. _ And  _ oh _ , Ben, it feels so good when you run them all over me. I’m not even sure I can take more than two of your fingers, but I wouldn’t mind trying.”

“Fuck,” he muttered, “Okay, maybe we’ll get you champagne more often.” Ben cleared his throat and said, “You know, we can do whatever you want.”

“Oh, and I’d let you do whatever you want,” she grinned. “I just want to hear you beg first.”

“I-” Ben took a deep breath and shook his head, “I’m not going to lie, that’s a distinct possibility at this point.”

“Remember last time we were in here?” she asked suggestively, “I came on your tongue so hard I thought I was going to black out. That’s what I want, Ben. Don’t you want your mouth on me?  _ Such _ a pity we don’t have time for that now.”

Ben sighed. “Okay, Rey, give me the champagne,” he insisted, finally finishing the simple crown braid he’d put in. “I think I need a fucking drink.”

* * *

Luck must have been on their side, because Rey managed to sober up  _ just _ enough to properly walk her mother down the aisle and behave herself for the ceremony, which was short and sweet, if not slightly amusing due to the extreme height difference between the bride and groom.

The weather had panned out well, and not five minutes after food had been served, Ben shoved a plate of food in Rey’s direction.

“I got all your favorites,” he said, gesturing to the plate, “So  _ please _ eat something so you sober up more.”

Rey’s eyes narrowed. “I thought you liked it when I drink.”

“I like how honest you are,” he admitted. Then he got closer and whispered, “But you can’t consent when you’re drunk, and I have plans for you later.”

_ That _ had gotten her attention pretty quickly, and she started downing water like she was about to take a trip through a desert.

The other thing that had gotten her attention was the gorgeous, tall brunette who had walked up to Ben, placing a hand on his arm as she gave him  _ come-hither _ eyes.

Well, that was fucking  _ not  _ happening.

Ten seconds later Rey was standing next to him, smiling sweetly as she said, “Hey, darling, don’t you owe me a dance?”

He turned to face her, looking surprisingly relieved and nodded, not even bothering to introduce her to the woman who was still trying to touch him. “I think I do, Rey. Let’s go.” He gave the woman a quick apology before following Rey out onto the small dance floor.

Ben wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a close embrace as they swayed to the last thirty seconds or so of whatever song was playing. “Thanks for that,” he said quietly, “Apparently she works for my mother and she couldn’t take a hint.”

“Oh, well,” Rey shrugged, “as your fiance, I’m happy to fend off women on your behalf.”

He smiled at that, and pulled her closer for a kiss. After all, everyone around them thought they were getting married...best to keep up appearances, he reasoned.

When Ben pulled away the music had changed, and after a moment he murmured, “They’re playing our song.”

Rey blinked, and asked curiously, “We have a song?”

“Sort of,” he hummed. “It’s what was playing the first time we danced together. I kind of think of it as our song.”

She smiled softly. “Oh.”

After a spin or two, he pulled her closer, whispering in her ear, “You know, you’ve been teasing me all day.”

Rey chuckled, and nuzzled her nose against his jaw. “So? What are you going to do about it.”

“What do you  _ want _ me to do about it?” he asked, voice low and suggestive.

“Well…” she reached up a bit and kissed a line down his neck, “there’s not much a good spanking can’t fix.”

Ben pulled back, his confident demeanor gone and substituted for his adorable, flustered one. “Are- are you just fucking with me? Because it’s really hard to tell sometimes.”

A predatory grin grew across her lips as she said sweetly, “Throwing up the white flag so soon?”

He let out a frustrated exhale, and breathed, “Absolutely  _ not. _ ”

“Good,” Rey smirked, knowing he more than likely wouldn’t call her bluff. “You’ve got such nice, big hands. Just one covers so much of me, and-”

“That’s really how you want to play this?” he interrupted, his eyes wide. He glanced around at the other guests, trying to make sure they hadn't been overheard.

“Gosh, Ben,” she asked, keeping her tone innocent, “You’re welcome to give up now. I think we both know you won’t follow through with it.”

His eyes grew dark, and a voice in her head warned her that she  _ might _ be a bit too overconfident. Warmth pooled low in her belly when he murmured, “Meet me upstairs in ten minutes and I’ll be happy to prove you wrong.”

* * *

Fifteen Years Earlier

“Leia, did’ya pack the marshmallows?”

Rey watched the woman roll her eyes. “Of  _ course _ I packed them, you idiot,” she answered playfully. “Did you really think I’d forget them?”

Han just grumbled in response, and while Rey normally would have giggled, she only managed a half-hearted smile. She’d just turned thirteen, and the Solo-Organas had invited her and Maz to spend a week with them at their family’s summer home on a nearby lake.

It would have been a dream come true, if Rey hadn’t just been hit with the news of her birth parents. She’d asked Maz a while before her birthday to help find out about them - not because she wasn’t happy where she was - Rey simply wanted to know where she’d come from. So, with Leia’s help, they’d dug up old records, gone through old files, and finally, sat Rey down to tell her the truth.

She’d been given up by people who just didn’t want her. They’d tried to sell her for drug money, and when that didn’t work, they’d left her in a basket outside a gas station.

Maz hadn’t wanted to tell her, but Rey had demanded the truth, and eventually, she’d gotten it.

It was a hell of a way to put a damper on her summer.

Rey had known for a few weeks by the time they went to the lakehouse, and she hadn’t yet mentioned it to Ben. But he knew her moods well, and he was immensely concerned about her, so that night, when the fireworks over the lake started, she’d worked up the nerve to cry into his shoulder and tell him the truth. His grip on her hand and her waist had tightened as she cried that they’d abandoned her like she was nothing. 

Maybe they were right, she reasoned.

Ben had just let her cry, and then when she had no more tears left, he’d said, “You’re wrong, Rey.” He’d shaken his head, and added with a whisper, “I think you’re everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	7. Beg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of the scenes in this sort-of fills a prompt given to me by my wonderful friend [ Dryless ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dryless/pseuds/dryless), who was kind enough to invite Onfire and I to join The Writing Den <3
> 
> Also, I'll preface this by saying this chapter is like, 90% smut and I'm not convinced I'm great at writing smut, so...

Rey wasn't entirely sure what she'd been thinking when she'd suggested  _spanking_. She sure as hell hadn't expected Ben to do anything more than blush and admit he wasn't up to the challenge.

_Oh_  how wrong she'd been.

It wasn't even something she'd done before - in general, she wasn't really much of a kinky person. In fact, the kinkiest things she'd done had probably been with Ben, and even then, they'd been relatively vanilla.

_Incredible,_  but vanilla.

But some combination of the tiny bit of alcohol still running through her veins, seeing him in a suit, and feeling his hands around her…

Well, she was absolutely curious to see if he'd follow through with her suggestion.

Rey watched the clock on her phone, glancing at it every thirty seconds. Ben had already managed to sneak out, and she'd planned to follow him a minute later, but his Uncle Luke had caught her and was going on about some farm he'd settled into, and if he talked any more about milking cows, she'd half-wonder if he had some sort of lactation kink.

Miraculously, there was a break in the conversation  _just_  long enough for her to slip out, claiming she wanted to get a sweater from her room (despite the surprisingly warm weather they'd had for the day). Her heart pounded as she took each step up the staircase leading to where Ben likely was, and when she finally arrived at their bedroom door, she paused to catch her breath.

They'd had sex before (and Rey had a very good idea that's definitely where this was heading). It wasn't anything to panic about.

At least, that's what she tried telling herself.

Somehow it was different now, though. Before, she'd been young and she hadn't felt heartbreak before, and she'd been so comfortable and at ease in his arms that even the first time hadn't been nerve-wracking.

But now…

He'd broken her heart before, whether he knew it or not, and if she wasn't careful he'd probably do it again. Rey swallowed hard, and promised herself... _no strings_. If she did this (and every part of her was screaming to just  _go through that damn door_ ), she couldn't let her feelings come out to play.

One more deep breath, and she opened the door to see Ben sitting on the edge of the bed they'd shared, smirking. His tie was gone, and the first few buttons of his shirt had been undone, and the cuffs of his sleeves were rolled up, leaving his forearms bare.

It was a fucking  _good_  look on him.

_It's just a game_ , she reminded herself, metaphorically giving her heart the finger as it picked up its pace.

It was a game, and it was one she was about to win.

Rey smiled sweetly at him, and carefully slipped the silver flats off her feet, then padded over barefoot to stand between his legs. The low height of the bed left his eyes nearly even with her chest. His eyes flicked down as she grasped the bottom of the skirt, pulling it up, but of course, since things just  _couldn't be that simple_ , the damn dress got stuck around her upper body, and he snorted, just before reaching up to help her finish removing it.

"So, uh," he paused, "you  _actually_  want me to spank you?"

Her dress landed somewhere in the corner of the room - exactly where, Rey couldn't be bothered to check, and Ben's eyes darkened as they roved over what she'd been left in.

Maz had made a brilliant choice with the dress. Not only had the color complimented Rey's skin tone, but it had pockets (automatically making it a favorite), and it had enough subtle padding and support to make a bra completely unnecessary.

Taking it off had left Rey wearing nothing but black lace panties - a choice she'd made while drunk and remembering Ben's hands fondly.

Drunk-Rey made  _excellent_  decisions, she decided.

"Well, actually I want to see if you have the balls to do it," she teased.

She noticed with a bit of evil glee that Ben's eyes had landed on her chest, and he'd swallowed hard. Another few minutes, and she was pretty sure she'd be claiming a victory.

And  _oh_ , what a victory it'd be.

Ignoring the scared voice in her head screaming  _what the hell are you doing?_ , Rey took a step closer and climbed into his lap. He let out a groan and caught her around the waist, moving back a bit on the bed to make more room for her knees. Once his thighs were no longer hanging off the bed, she grinned, knowing the  _perfect_ way to truly call his bluff.

Ben Solo was fucking  _great_  at sex, but he got flustered easily, and she had a feeling her plan would undo him completely. So, she smirked, and moved to lay across his lap, ass up, with her front on the bed next to him.

"Holy shit, Rey," she heard him whisper.

She was  _so_  close to cackling. Ben didn't stand a chance.

"So, are we just going to stay like this," she asked teasingly, "or do you plan on-"

Without warning, a firm hand slapped down on her ass, and she let out a surprised yelp.

" _Fuck_ ," she gasped.

That...she had  _not_ expected that.

"What is it, darling?" he leaned down and whispered into her ear, "Didn't think I'd do it?"

"Actually, no," she huffed, entirely focused on the hand that was massaging her ass.

"Well," Ben laughed, "turns out, playing along sounded kinda fun. Do you want me to keep going?" he asked, his voice low. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Without taking the time to actually think it through, she breathed, "If you want, and no, you didn't. You can go harder, if you want."

His hand stilled then, and left her skin, and she thought  _maybe_ she'd gone too far. But then he asked, "How many do you deserve,  _darling_?"

_Wow_ this was a lot more of a turn on than she'd expected. She heard her own shaky voice suggest, "Three?"

"Three? No, Rey, I don't think so." After a moment he chuckled darkly and said, "Because of you, my parents have gotten the impression that I've got a daddy kink and they're picking out names for our future children. Oh, and apparently you've told them we plan to have quite a few.  _Thanks for that_ , by the way." He paused, and finally said, "So, if we're doing this, you're getting five, minimum. But personally," his hand gently stroked over her bare thigh, and -  _oh_ \- he ran a single finger over her lace-covered center, "Well, personally, I was thinking ten."

"Compromise on six?" she asked hopefully.

Ben thought about it for a moment, and made a disapproving noise. "Six. But only if you stop commenting on our sex life in front of my parents."

She let out a snort, and was about to nod when she felt her whole body stiffen in response to another loud  _crack_  against her backside. Rey let out a quiet whine just as Ben rubbed against her skin and said, in a low and silky voice, "Shouldn't you be counting?"

"Sorry," she gulped, still completely surprised by the turn their little game had taken. She sure as hell hadn't expected him to participate, and this wasn't even something she would normally be into, but  _wow_  was it working.

"You've been such a tease," he scolded playfully, and Rey had to shove a hand over her mouth to keep from crying out as his hand came down against her other cheek, stinging  _just_  the right way.

"Three," she murmured, wriggling in search of some sort of friction as he squeezed the spot he'd just reddened.

He'd barely let the word slip from her mouth before bringing his hand down again, and she felt her eyes water, a tidal wave of arousal mixed with pain washing over her.

Rey took a deep breath, and breathed out the word, "Four."

After his hum of approval, Rey realized she was rocking her hips back against his hand. With a moment's pause, he pushed the lace she wore far enough to the side to slowly trail a finger down her folds, gently slipping it in.

"You're soaked," he groaned. "Fuck, Rey, you're so wet. Oh, darling," he sighed, "you've always been  _so_  wet for me. What do you think, Rey, will you still tease me if I get you off?"

"No," she whispered, and she nearly cried when he removed his finger and surprised her with another spank, this one a bit softer than the previous ones, and she mewled, "Five," just as she arched her back, desperately trying to grind against him.

"Good," he crooned. "Do you need me to touch you?"

" _Yes._ "

Two fingers pushed into her almost immediately, and she worked her hips back against hand as he purred, "Don't forget, Rey. You've still got one left."

Another minute later, and his fingers disappeared, leaving her empty, and she dropped her forehead to rest on the bed underneath her, letting out a frustrated sigh.

Ben let out a deep, rumbling chuckle as his hand came down for the last time, and Rey could have sworn she felt her arousal spike at the sound it made.

"That's six," she said in a husky voice, "now are you going to get me off, or not?"

"Darling, I think we discussed this. If you want to come you'll have to ask nicely."

"Ben," she breathed, still determined not to beg, "Didn't you feel how tight I was around your fingers? Just imagine how I'd feel around your-"

His hands went still on her once more, and in an instant, he'd grasped her hips, and tossed her onto the bed, knocking the air out of her lungs. He rolled her over so she laid on her back, her hair splayed out on the comforter. Kicking off his shoes, he got on the bed and crawled over her, placing a knee on either side of her hips.

Rey took a breath to calm herself and ordered, "Tell me. Tell me you want me, and tell me the truth - tell me what you'd rather do instead of playing these silly little games. Say the words, and we can stop torturing each other."

Ben groaned, and lowered his head to mouth at her throat, finally murmuring against her skin, "I want you. I want to touch you, and I want to make you come so hard you scream my name."

"Yes," she sighed, feeling his plush lips work down toward her chest, "Whatever you want, Ben - no strings, I promise."

In an instant his lips froze, halfway through planting a kiss just over her heart. She felt warm breath leave his lips as he hesitated, and then finally nodded, continuing his assault on her skin.

Rey gasped as she felt him wrap his lips around one of her nipples, and she moaned, "Please, kiss me."

Not a second later, he'd raised his head to meet her eyes, and he said in a surprisingly gentle tone, "Is this what you want, Rey? Are you sure?"

It was a bit of an odd question, she thought. It seemed rather obvious to her, considering how she'd stripped herself and laid herself over his lap, that she, in fact,  _wanted_  this. Desperately so. Rey nodded vigorously, and felt a surge of joy as he met her lips, plunging his tongue in to lap against hers. He kissed her as though they'd never get a chance to kiss again.

That hadn't changed, apparently.

_Oh_ , how did this man kiss her like that and only think of her as his best friend? That was some fucking cruel sort of torture, but Rey's mind was wiped of her concerns as he reached up to cup her face, managing to kiss her even more deeply, his open mouth sliding against hers in a feverish, frantic caress.

He only pulled away to take the last bit of lace off her, and the moment she was bare, Rey wrapped her legs around him, finally realizing he was still fully dressed. She stretched her arms up and tugged on his collar, grumbling, " _Off_. Why are you still wearing clothes?"

"Alright, alright," he murmured, smiling.

He backed away and got off the bed, stripping gracefully as she lifted herself up on her elbows to watch the view.

Thank  _God_  he'd been the one to break first, because she'd been about to do it herself, and she was reminded of why that was the case as soon as his shirt was off, and her eyes were free to roam over the planes of his chest, firm stomach, and broad shoulders.

He huffed slightly at her staring, and finally freed himself of the suit's pants, and his boxers. Rey's eyes went directly to his hardened length, and she swallowed hard.

Between his length and girth, part of her wondered how on  _earth_  she'd ever lost her virginity to the guy without an excessive amount of discomfort.

_Right._ His tongue. That's how.

Rey blushed at the memory, and moaned audibly as she watched him kneel at her feet, as if able to read her mind. Ben pulled gently at her legs, sliding her toward him until his face was  _right_  where she wanted it, and he lifted her legs over his shoulders.

He trailed a burning line of kisses up the inside of her thigh, and whispered, "Is this okay?"

"Yes," she sighed contently, "of  _course_  it's okay."

Ben hummed and reached up, splaying a hand on her abdomen, holding her in place as his mouth zeroed in on her center. He planted a slow, sweet kiss there, licking at her lightly before pulling away to say, "You taste better than I remember."

She sucked in a breath as he flattened his tongue against her core and gently slid it up until he came to the sensitive nub that made her keen. He wrapped his lips around her clit, and  _sucked_. Feeling her limbs turn to jelly, Rey relaxed on the bed, focused solely on the sounds of his tongue lapping away at her, slowly building tension in the pit of her stomach.

As soon as Rey felt his nose nudge against her clit, she knew that time hadn't managed to sweeten her memories - it really was as exquisite as she remembered. And why wouldn't it have been? Ben had learned to do this on  _her_ , so naturally he'd ended up figuring out exactly what he needed to do to make her squirm.

One of his hands left her thigh, and she felt a finger enter her gently, sliding in with ease due to how well he'd prepared her. A second followed once he'd remembered how wet she was, and the moment he crooked his fingers inside her, Rey knew she was going to see stars.

Her hand flew down and buried itself in his thick mane - it was longer than it'd been the last time they did this - and Rey's mouth opened in a silent cry as he worked his mouth against her clit while massaging the sensitive spot inside her. Pressure built steadily, and she was less and less aware of the sounds escaping her mouth until finally -  _finally_  - something snapped, and she heard herself sob his name over and over.

Ben worked her down from her high slowly, and pulled away, letting out a puff of breath. "I really missed doing that," he admitted.

Warm. Everything was warm, and tingly, like that wonderful feeling Rey usually felt after a glass of nice wine.

A happy, content noise escaped her throat, and she propped herself up on her elbows to give him a lazy smile. Ben's gaze met her eyes as he planted a kiss to the inside of her knee.

"Good?" he asked, carefully lifting her legs off his shoulders. He stood up and stared at her at her.

Rey nearly laughed at that question. It was a  _very_ stupid question.

"Yeah," she whispered. " _Very_  good. But…" she made meaningful eye contact with his desperately hard length, and said quietly, "There's something else I'd like now."

He grinned, and nodded, pressing a knee into the mattress so he could climb over her. After a moment of glancing down at her, he seemed to make a decision, and he planted his knees on either side of her again, gently wrapping his arms around her upper body. Then he flipped them, and Rey found herself sitting on his lap, while he laid on his back, staring up at her in awe.

"I know I've said it before," he said softly, "but you're really beautiful."

It seemed silly to blush considered everything they'd done, but Rey did anyway. "So are you," she replied, tracing her hand over his chest, admiring the marks on his alabaster skin.

Ben sat up, catching her with an arm around her hips, and pressed their chests together, meeting her lips in a sweet kiss, and Rey's heart warmed as he nuzzled his nose against hers, and held her tightly. They stayed like that, his legs stretched out and hers wrapped around his waist while she sat in his lap, just kissing for what felt like hours. At some point her lips had started to feel swollen and almost as plush as his as he sucked on her bottom lip, carefully nipping at it every once in a while.

An eternity later, he moved her just enough to grasp the hardness that had been resting between them, and nudged it against her entrance, earning a small gasp from Rey. Her head dropped to rest on his shoulder and she nodded against him, inhaling sharply as he then entered her all at once.

Ben stilled as soon as he was fully seated inside her, and he pulled back, lifting her chin with his hand so he could meet her eyes. When she saw his, she noticed they'd gone very wide, and he breathed, "Do you have  _any_  idea how good you feel?"

Smiling shyly, Rey settled into his arms, and rolled her hips against his, crooning as his length dragged against  _just_  the right spots.

" _Fuck_ , Rey," he hissed, leaning down a bit so he could snuggle against her neck, " _Oh_ , that feels incredible.  _You_  feel incredible."

Leveraging her hands on his shoulders, she lifted off him slightly and pushed back down, then repeated the movement until she started moaning.

By then, Ben had grasped around her abdomen, helping her ride him slowly until she'd started breathing heavily. "Ben," she whimpered, "Ben, I'm  _so_  close."

He pulled her tightly to him then, using an arm planted behind him for balance as he thrusted up into her, picking up the pace until she started tightening around him, making incomprehensible noises against his mouth. Rey let out a soft noise with each thrust as he repeatedly buried himself as deep as he could go, and finally, she shattered around him, taking him over the abyss with her.

Their movements stopped a few moments later, and she broke their kiss to let out a stuttering breath against his skin. Foreheads still touching, Rey's hazel eyes lifted to his brown as she whispered, " _Wow."_

"I know," he murmured.

Rey blinked, noticing her eyes had started watering, and said with a breathy chuckle, "So, I think you lost."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Ben said, smiling broadly. He kissed the tip of her nose and said, "I think we both just won."

 

* * *

Fourteen Years Earlier

A month or two into Ben's sophomore year in high school, Rey started dating a guy in her class.

Ben hated him.

Part of him wondered if he'd missed his chance to tell her how he felt, but he was comforted by the fact that she hadn't started abandoning their friendship to date. As it was, she'd only gone out on two dates with the smarmy, sniveling red-head-

Okay, so actually Hux was kind of nice, but Ben had started hating him the moment he saw Rey holding his hand.

It took all his willpower to  _calm the fuck down_  and trust that she was happy, and that lasted for a whole month, at which point he came home after spending a few hours in the library after school, one dreary Friday in November, and noticed Rey had left him a message in her window.

_Come over?_

He frowned. She'd been hanging out with Hux after school, and he hadn't thought she'd be home already, but he just shrugged and threw on a dark gray sweater before making his way over to Maz's. The woman let him in wearing a bit of a worried expression, and that's when a heavy weight settled in his stomach.

Ben took the stairs up to her room two at a time, and knocked at her door until he heard a soft, "Come in."

Rey was sitting on her bed, wearing a plain long-sleeved maroon shirt with their school's math team motto, and her hair was still in the braid he'd done for her before school. The look on her face was a wash of confusion.

"Hey," he said quietly, approaching her carefully, "what's up?"

"It's stupid," she muttered, biting down on her lip while she glanced away from him, out the window. "He- he tried to kiss me."

Ben did  _not_  want to hear that. He would make up an excuse and get back to his room  _immediately_ , maybe punch a wall on the way, and-

"I didn't let him, and then he got kinda mad and I broke up with him," Rey continued. "I don't know  _why_  I didn't notice it, but I guess…" she shrugged, and sighed, "I didn't want my first kiss to be with someone I just met, like a month ago." She looked back at Ben and groaned, rolling her eyes, "I  _told_ you it was stupid."

"Oh. No," he shook his head, "that's not stupid."

Ben was actually fairly surprised they hadn't kissed -  _that_  had been a thought that'd been torturing him for a month - but he tried to hide that as he sat down on Rey's bed next to her.

"I'm sorry he got mad," Ben added.

Rey shrugged again. "I'm not. I'm not really sure I liked him much to begin with." She paused and word vomit left her mouth in a rush, "I'm not even sure why I went out with him, but he seemed nice, and he's the only guy who's ever  _asked_ , but every time he held my hand I just cringed, and I don't know, maybe it's silly, but I just thought my first kiss would be with someone who was my best friend, and-

"I thought I your best friend," Ben interrupted blankly.

Her hazel eyes raised nervously to meet his shocked stare, and she blushed as she said, "Uh, yeah. You are."

Ben swallowed hard.  _Did she mean-?_

"I haven't kissed anyone either," he admitted.

She inched closer, and Ben could have sworn his heart was about to beat out of his chest.

"That's okay," Rey smiled. "No pressure, you don't have to. I just thought that since we're friends, it might be-"

"It's a really good idea," he blurted.

Well, the  _just friends_  part wasn't, but he could tell her that later.

Her smile lit up the room, and he took a deep breath, then cupped her cheek in his hand and leaned in, letting his eyes flutter shut as he tentatively pressed his lips to hers.

It was perfect, they'd decided afterward, and they'd both thought the same about the kiss that followed immediately after, and the next dozen or more after that.

At some point Rey had declared, just before tackling him in another kiss that left him dizzy, that one of the benefits of being best friends was that they could practice with each other. Ben decided he was more than happy with that arrangement.

He could admit to being in love with her later, he reasoned - once he'd worked up the nerve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	8. Timing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Onfire managed to make this even more adorable and sappy. I think you'll all like this chapter.

He was in danger of falling. Falling into a dream and not waking up.

Something in Ben's chest purred as Rey rested her head against his shoulder, catching her breath. She was...she was more than he could have ever hoped for, and not for the first time in the few days he'd been home, he found himself wondering what deity had decided to grace his life with such a blessing as her once again. Maybe Bacchus was involved. At the rate he and Rey were going they were probably going to need a wine cellar wherever they ended up.

And there he went making plans again. Decade old plans were resurfacing with surprising clarity as the days had passed.

He tightened his arms around her back, keeping her wrapped around him as he clung to her, and his heart warmed as he felt her sigh against his skin. Her breaths were like soft kisses along his flesh and he wondered if it was possible to just stay there forever.

But that would be too much like tying her down, and after her comment earlier...

Ben looked outside his window at the gorgeous day, and wondered when it was along this trip back home - a trip he thought he'd do alone - he'd found himself with too much good fortune he was afraid it was an illusion.

_No strings._

It took about two seconds for his inner voice to come up with a suitably appropriate response.

Yeah,  _no._  Fuck that noise.

He needed to tell her. Like, ten years ago.

"Hey Rey," he said softly, hoping he wasn't about to mess everything up all over again.

Rey stirred against him, splaying her brown locks over his shoulder, and he shivered, as goose tendrils of cold and hot fell down his back.

She made a soft, vulnerable sound, the noise tweaking every cell in his body and he couldn't help but marvel at how a girl so small could break him so easily. And why he'd left such a profound and entrancing danger in the first place.

He swallowed hard, and repeated, in a terrified whisper, "Rey...about what you said…"

_Come on Ben, where's that famous Solo courage?_

Probably dead in a ditch from all the alcohol consumption.

Diagnosis: Fucked for this girl.

But it seemed Ben had learned something in the ten years since the worst mistake he'd ever made, because the next words out of his mouth happened to be, "Did you mean it?"

He felt her nails dig in a little to his back, and he hoped whatever happened next didn't end with his heart in the shredder. She'd gone not stiff exactly, but her mellowness from before was replaced with an awareness that would have normally turned him on a ridiculous amount.

Ah shit, it was. Rey was totally going to notice and  _shit_  that would just make things even more awkward.

"When you said-" he swallowed and said the dreaded words, " _No strings_. Did you mean that?"

 _Please say no_ , he desperately wanted to beg, but because Ben still had some dignity (and because it probably wouldn't have made his chances any better), he didn't.

Panic. Pure, acidic panic bubbled in his throat as he heard the sharp inhale and the whisper of some words he couldn't catch.

_He shouldn't have asked._

"Isn't that what you want?" she finally said in a quiet, suddenly scratchy voice.

Alright, it wasn't an outright rejection. It wasn't good, but they'd also avoided a worst-case scenario of potentially nuclear proportions.

"Uh…" Ben felt his chest heave against hers as the panic continued to spread. He cleared his throat, and said, "Rey, I think we need to make sure we're on the same page here."

His tight grip around her body meant he could feel the shuddering breath she took in. It also meant his hips responded to her motion like a well-tuned piano, as she seemed to unconsciously adjust in place in his lap.

She still hadn't pulled away, which is why he was a little surprised (and more than a little flustered), when she said in small husky voice, "You first?"

In retrospect, starting this conversation when he was  _still inside her_  was not his smartest move. Christ, her voice alone could make him weak-kneed and now...well, he'd had dreams. And daydreams. And fucking full-out imaginary cinematic re-enactments about this exact position and everything involving her, her voice, and the spirit inside her.

"No, you," he ended up chuckling, a little nervously, trying to let out some of the tension that was building in his bones.

After what felt like an eternity, she pulled back just far enough to stare up at him with the eyes that had stuck with him for as long as he could remember what  _home_  and  _autumn_  looked like. Rey propped her arms on his shoulders, tucking them behind his head, and whispered, "On three?"

He remembered a night full of stars and the brightest shine he'd ever seen.

 _She had to know._ He made a split-second decision, knowing deep in his gut that, no matter how the words were received, they needed saying. Whether or not she felt the same way, she deserved to hear the truth.

She breathed out and Ben fell in love all over again when he saw her smile nervously, just before he jumped the gun. Before she even had a chance to start counting.

"I want strings," Ben blurted out, "I want strings, Rey. Ropes, chains, even-" he paused and felt his blush turn luminescent, before saying shyly, "Okay, I didn't mean for it to come out like that, but you know what I mean. I just-" he looked her in the eyes and breathed the easiest words to ever leave his mouth. "I love you. I love you so much Rey. I- I always have. I never stopped."

Her eyes had gone wide, her mouth dropped, and her breath hitched and nevermind all the little things the rest of her body was doing. He didn't know what a confessional felt like, but if he could be subject to the sight of her for the rest of his life, Ben would become a pious man.

A dozen heartbeats later, Rey was still staring up at him in shock.

"Your turn," he said with a hint of nervous laughter. "Strings, or no strings, Rey?"

He watched her blink and lick her lips before murmuring, "I- I love you too."

She leaned in close and pulled his head down. He had to stop himself from seizing her lips because those were the most beautiful words he'd ever heard, and he had to stop himself because there was no way he was this lucky.

Rey seemed to realize that, and the smile she sent him, fragile and radiant, scattered his thoughts to the wind. "I love you too," she repeated.

He watched her utter every syllable, and he burned the sight into his brain, like a blind man who could finally see the sky.

All at once, warm, comforting relief flooded his body, and suddenly the odds he'd given himself earlier seemed laughably incorrect. Ben felt his jaw drop as he uttered strained words in disbelief, "You do?"

"Yeah, Ben," she nodded, a small smile growing across her face, "Of course I do, and uh, actually, I think, maybe we should-"

A loud knock on the door jerked away whatever words she'd been about to say, and Ben was half tempted to just yell at the likely-lost wedding guest to  _get the fuck away_  so he could finish his conversation with the love of his life in peace, but  _then_  the intruder spoke.

"Uh,  _kids_ ," his uncle grumbled through the door, "y'know, sneaking off during a wedding is a lot more subtle if one of you isn't in the wedding party. You've got the photographer looking everywhere for you - she wants some pictures of Maz and Rey."

Rey groaned, then let out a soft chuckle as she kissed his shoulder, and Ben couldn't help but grin.

"Sorry Uncle Luke," Ben finally replied, suddenly very relieved to notice he hadn't managed to put any visible marks on her, "We'll be down in a bit." Then he muttered to Rey, "Sorry, he has the fucking  _worst_  timing sometimes."

When he looked down at the woman in his arms, she'd turned bright red, and said shyly, "Maybe we should talk more about this later?"

All Ben could do was smile, pull her closer, and meet her lips in a tender kiss.

When they broke off the kiss, she gave him a wicked grin and did  _this thing_  with her hips that suddenly made Ben want to spear his uncle for interrupting them.

"You have," she murmured, before lifting herself almost entirely off of him and pushing back down, making him groan, "some pretty piss-poor timing yourself."

Ben was about to say something, maybe to the nature of his defense, but then she sent him a smoke-eyed stare that killed his protestations before they were even born.

Rey murmured, "Think they'd notice if we took an extra twenty minutes?"

"I'm willing to find out," he smirked

* * *

Ben was staring. He knew. He just didn't care.

And really, how could he not? Rey was easily the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen and knowing how she felt... _okay_ , so, he never  _ever_  would have used the word "beaming" to describe himself, but after the last hour or so, it was the most accurate word his mostly-fried brain could come up with.

After they'd (reluctantly) gotten off the bed, he'd helped her back into her dress (actually using the zipper this time), and he'd rolled his eyes as she giggled, watching him try and flatten out the wrinkles that had formed in his suit when he'd haphazardly tossed it on the bedroom floor.

They'd been met with minimal awkwardness when they returned to the tent, and found with relief, that the reception was still in full swing, though that probably had something to do with the caterers opening another few cases of wine.

He'd grabbed a glass for himself while Rey had been whisked away for a few family pictures, and that's how he ended up staring stupidly at the woman he was definitely going to marry.

_Holy shit._

He was going to marry Rey.

Somehow that particular realization hadn't already hit him, and when it did, he felt a surge of happiness rush through his veins. How on  _earth_  had he lucked into-

"Benny, there you are!"

Leia bustled over in his direction, and when she finally arrived in front of him, all he could do was breathe, "Mom, I'm going to marry her."

She tilted her head. "Well, yes, Ben," she snorted, "that  _does_  tend to happen once you give a woman an engagement ring."

For some reason her words snapped him from his reverie and he blushed. "Right. Yeah, sorry, sometimes it's just hard to believe, I guess."

Her expression softened at that, and she said, "That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about - you and Rey."

"Oh, mom," he groaned, "Not more grandkid talk, please, I'm pretty sure you've done enough damage to our livers with that in the last few-"

"Hush," Leia scolded, "I've just been teasing Rey. I know you aren't thinking about kids yet, but it's so easy to turn that girl red." Ben gaped at her casual admission, but she ignored him and continued, "No, what I wanted to talk to you about has more to do with your immediate plans. I-," she paused, "I know it's unlikely, but I was wondering if you'd considered moving back to the area."

Ben blinked. "Oh. That's- that's not what I thought you'd say."

"Anyway, your father's ill - you know that," she continued, "and Chewie needs help at the garage. I know Rey mentioned something about losing her job in Chicago, and I wasn't sure where you two were planning to live once you got married, but you can always come work at Rebel Industries, you  _know_  I'd love to see you take it over someday."

He...he hadn't actually considered where they'd live.  _How_  had he not considered that?

Oh, right. He was too distracted staring.

"That's actually not a bad idea, mom," he admitted, surprising himself. "Let me talk to Rey about it?"

The woman seemed pleasantly surprised by his response, and nodded.

"Just, on one condition," he added. "Would you  _please_  stop hounding Rey about grandkids?"

"Will you think about giving me one?" she countered.

Ben rolled his eyes and sighed. "I guess I could take it into consideration, but ultimately it's up to her, so don't press your luck."

Leia grinned after a moment. "Good boy."

* * *

Thirteen Years Earlier

At best, Rey was fairly confused about her friendship with Ben. She'd  _thought_  he'd take the hint after they'd kissed. Maybe not after the first one, but  _c'mon_ , by the tenth one he  _had_  to have figured it out, right? He wasn't a total idiot.

Though...actually Rey was starting to wonder, because it had been something like nine months and the guy  _still_  hadn't brought it up. He didn't actually think it was normal for best friends to make out during study breaks, or ditch lunch to find a quiet part of the library where nobody would catch them, right?

She'd even tried mentioned it once in a while, which led to a lot of blushing and even more kissing, but for some reason, they never really managed to actually discuss what was going on.

Honestly, it was starting to worry her. Did he just want to be friends? Because  _she_  sure didn't, and she was beginning to think she'd need to make that very, very clear.

In fact, after he'd gone home the night they'd first kissed, seeming giddy after they'd spent so long laying on her bed and exploring each other's mouths, she'd sat down at her desk with a massive smile on her face. Some voice in her head had whispered something about how she'd caught feelings.

Oh, she'd caught them alright. She'd caught them and spiraled into them, throwing herself headlong into what she quickly came to recognize was...well, love,  _probably._

By the time Rey's freshman year was over, she'd decided - if he didn't ask her out or tell her he liked her, or  _something_  by her fifteenth birthday (which, at this rate, was less than a month off), she'd just have to do it herself.

After all, there was nothing wrong with a girl asking a guy out. There were no rules saying it had to be the other way around, and if there were, Rey thought that was pretty idiotic.

She never got the chance, though.

A couple weeks before her birthday, on a Saturday evening just before dusk, he drove up in front of Maz's in a car Han was letting him drive. He'd been giving her rides to school for a couple of months since he'd gotten his license, and when he parked in front of Maz's and honked the horn playfully, she threw on a light sweater over her shorts and dashed out to hop in, only giving her mother a quick wave and a "Gonna hang out with Ben, be back soon!"

Of course, Maz had chuckled and given her a knowing look, but Rey tried not to think about that too hard.

She'd only turned red as the woman yelled back at her, "Don't let that boy get too handsy!"

_Dear Lord._

Rey wasn't clear on their plans for the evening, but as it turned out, Ben had packed them a picnic (thought, realistically,  _Leia_  had probably packed them a picnic) with a blanket, and while picking at containers full of fruit, cheese, meats, and crackers, they'd ended up laying side by side in a fairly empty park, staring up at the stars that had just started to show.

"You're quiet," he commented, grabbing another strawberry from the container she was holding. "What's up?"

She hesitated, and took the coward's way out, turning her head on the blanket to glance over at him. "Just happy, I guess."

"Nah," he disagreed, "There's something else. I know you Kanata. There's something on your mind."

Rather than audibly gulping because  _shit_  she was not ready to tell him - she was supposed to have another couple of weeks, according to her plan - she ignored the butterflies in her stomach and shrugged, her shoulder rubbing against his, "Really, it's nothing."

Ben huffed. "Rey, I know when you're lying. C'mon, spill."

Her heart was pounding into her throat as she whispered, "What about you? What's on your mind?"

"Deflecting, huh?" he teased. He rolled over on his side to face her, propping his head up on an elbow so he could look down at her. "Make you a deal - we'll each think of something to say, and at the count of three, we'll just say it."

Rey took a deep breath and let it out slowly, closing her eyes, as she nodded. "Okay, deal. But lay back down."

Maybe what she had to say would be easier if he wasn't looking at her, and  _holy crap_  did she need to figure out a way to shut down the butterflies that were causing a racket in her stomach.

Ben's eyes narrowed for a moment, and he frowned, but laid back down, scooting next to her so their sides were touching. Her breath caught in her throat when he found her hand and laced his fingers into hers.

Then he whispered, "One...Two…"

Before he could get out "three", answers burst from both of their mouths.

" _I'm in love with you."_

" _I think I love you."_

A second of processing later, Rey's eyes shot wide, and she scrambled to sit up, gasping, "Wait,  _what?"_

Ben wore a similar expression, and once he sat up, a wide grin that sent a tingly feeling down her spine formed across his face. "You do?" he asked curiously, "Since when?"

"Uh, it's been a while," she admitted.

Well before Rey thought to ask him the same question, he'd reached over, pulled her to him, and caught her lips in a slow caress of a kiss that ended up leaving her breathless.

A few moments later, her eyes were still closed, but he'd pulled away just far enough to catch his breath, and she felt shivers as his warm breath landed on her lips.

Then he murmured against her skin, "Want to go make out in my car?"

Her eyes opened then, and she raised an eyebrow just before breaking out into giggles. Despite the giggling, she nodded, and then sighed at the realization that a huge weight was no longer resting on her chest.

"I love you," she whispered, testing the words on her lips.

Ben's smile brightened even further, as he said softly, "I love you too, Rey."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	9. Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, but onfire and I are pretty busy working on Equilibrium's CH 37!
> 
> The smut's for my wonderful friend Dryless ;) You're lovely, and I'm always happy to fill prompts from you!

The wedding celebrations had broken up not long after they'd returned to the party, and after saying their goodbyes to the happy couple who were headed off to the Organa-Solo's lakehouse for a few weeks, Rey half-dragged Ben back to their room.

Once the door was shut behind them, he spun her around, took her by the waist and pressed her gently against the door, kissing her silly until Ben could barely remember his own name. Coincidentally, all he could think of was hers.

"Ben," she breathed, "Join me in the shower?"

She asked this with a hurricane smile and a promise full of  _something._  There wasn't enough self-control in the world that could make him say  _no_  to that. No one in their right mind would ever want to.

He nodded vigorously, his hands finding the zipper to her dress. It fell with a soft, swishing  _whoosh_  to the floor, and as she scrabbled at his jacket cuffs, it too, joined the dress. Rey unbuttoned his shirt and pressed her hands against his suddenly bare, vast chest, and with one arm solidly around her waist while the other held her head to his, he started walking backward, in the direction of the bathroom.

During the trip, they managed to strip each other entirely, only pausing to meet in burning kisses that threatened to scorch their surroundings with their intensity. A flip of a switch, and only the lights over the vanity mirror and sink turned on, leaving most of the room dimly lit.

Ben stopped when he caught a glimpse of her. Swollen pink lips, and slightly reddened cheeks. Wide, gorgeous hazel eyes looking up at him in wonder and lust. Hair braided and circled around her in a crown, with wisps falling around her face in a few places. He delighted in the sight of those out-of-place strands, feeling a pulsing thrill in the knowledge that he was the one to set them out of place. The rest of her stood shorter than he and yet he could feel the timeless urge to bring her close and never let her leave his arms again.

_Stunning._

"What are you staring at?" she asked, giggling softly as his expression, which was undoubtedly one of awe. Christ, just her laugh was intoxicating. Dangerous and wilful and so many things that he could drink in eternally without drowning.

"You," he whispered, finally.

Her expression slipped into something softer, and her head dropped a bit as she let herself lean forward against his chest.

"You know, I had this plan for hot shower sex, and you're ruining it with all your sappiness," she teased playfully, smirking at his reaction to the mention of  _shower sex_.

Ben reached around her immediately and turned the water on just before picking her up. She shrieked and there wasn't a word for the kind of fireworks show going in on his chest when he heard that. He climbed into the shower with her with as much grace as he could manage, eager to bring her invitation to life. He dropped her carefully on her feet under the spray of the water, but kept his arms around her.

"Ben!" she squealed, just before breaking into more laughter, "I was just kidding! Have you forgotten what happened last time we tried this?"

Oh, he hadn't. They'd made a good attempt, but he'd had bruises for days, and they'd both admitted (after falling on their asses) that their injuries could have been  _far_  more embarrassing. But a decade later, Ben was considerably more confident in his ability to survive shower sex without breaking something.

"Nope. You said it, now it's happening," he joked. Then he smiled down at her and winked. "Trust me?"

Ben could see her considering it as water rained down on her, slowly dampening her hair. His mouth watered as he watched it land on her shoulders, and run down over the soft curve of her breasts. When she gulped nervously but nodded, he grinned and tightened his arms around her, then lifted her off the shower floor as if she was weightless.

Rey seemed surprised by his choice of position, but quickly wrapped her legs around his waist, letting out a quiet whimper as his length bumped against her center. Ben nuzzled his nose against hers and smiled as their lips pressed together, his heart soaring as he felt her hum contentedly. The water made a theater show of her face, dancing this way and that as he leaned in and tried to pass on ten years worth of love to her in the span of seconds.

They continued kissing slowly, just as they'd done so many times, so many years earlier. Ben turned to press her against the shower wall, and felt her shiver as her back met the cold tiles. Whether from the cold, or their activities, her nipples hardened and dragged against his chest as she braced her arms around his shoulders. He ducked his head to lick across her nipple, then sucked it into her mouth as he listened to her moan.

"As incredible as that feels," she gasped, her head resting back against the tiling, "I'm pretty sure I've been ready for over an hour. I think you underestimate how good you look in a suit."

Ben chuckled against her breast and raised his head to grab her lower lip between his teeth. When he pulled back, he reached between them and slid a finger into her with ease. "Oh,  _Rey,_ " he groaned, "Yeah, you're already wet."

She scrunched up her nose and seemed to let out a low whinged pitch that did wonderful things to his imagination before asking, "So why are you taking your time?"

"Impatient, huh?"

Rey rolled her eyes and said, "If you aren't in me in the next ten seconds, I  _swear-"_

Her words were interrupted by her own moan as he pushed into her, bottoming out in one, swift move. Ben's head fell to her shoulder and he bit at her hungrily before murmuring, "Can- can I…"

"Yes," she breathed, "Please. Just…" she let out a light laugh, and said, "Just don't drop me, okay?"

Rey's lips formed into a round shape as he pulled almost all the way out of her, only to drive back in, setting a punishing rhythm as he held her with one arm, and braced another arm against the shower wall. Her hips met his eagerly and with unprecedented delight. Her breaths left gooseflesh rising on his skin with every thrust and if he wasn't careful there was a chance she might bruise with how tightly he held her.

There was goodness in the world and in that moment, Ben had all he could ever want right in his arms.

Water rained over them, and the only other noises were soft pants coming from Rey, and the sound of skin hitting skin, over and over. Ben attacked her mouth in a ferocious kiss, sliding his lips over hers as his tongue pushed into her at the same pace his hips had set against hers.

Her arm tightened around his shoulders, and the other reached up to run fingers through his wet hair, pulling gently as he thrust against her at break-neck speed. The arduous heat between them, once so suffocating as to be mind-numbing, only served to push him to go harder with every passing second. He was in danger of losing his mind the longer they stayed like that, keeping that pace, and he reveled in it, and in her.

He pulled back to catch his breath, and rested his forehead against hers, "Fuck, Rey, I'm not going to last much longer like this."

"Don't worry, I-" she moaned just as his fingers found her clit and circled around it, " _Oh_ , I'm close, please don't- don't stop."

Water from the shower head poured down his back, and Ben's teeth nipped at her neck. He sucked over each spot he bit, leaving marks in his wake, trailing from the soft spot behind her ear, down to her chest. His hips sped up and then stuttered for a moment as he felt her start clenching around his dick. Her pants shortened and her eyes closed as she leaned her head back against the wall.

Moments later he felt her flutter and pulse around him, just as Rey let out a high-pitched whine. He let himself get lost in her pleasure, feeling her tighten as he held her to him. He groaned as he spilled in her, chasing right behind her high.

For the second time that week, they stayed under the water until it rain cold.

* * *

"Hey, Ben," she said quietly, breaking the comfortable silence that had settled over the dark room. "Can I ask you something?"

After their shower, they'd realized how late it was and they'd decided to climb into bed. Rey had curled up next to him, and rested her head on his chest before finally asking him. Whatever question she had in store, she seemed nervous to ask it.

"Anything," he whispered, promising her the moon if she requested it of him.

"Why'd you end things? Last time?"

 _Anything but that_.

It shouldn't have been possible to feel cold. Not with her head on his chest, in a spot that felt more right than any truth.

Bad decisions were a dime a dozen sometimes, but that one had been a multi-trillion dollar fuckup. "I- Yeah. Yeah, that- that is something we should talk about."

Ben felt her nod against his chest and he wondered if she could hear the heavy staccato beat his heart had picked up as soon as she asked the question. "Just, Rey...before we talk about that, you know I'll never leave again, right? That-" he choked, "That was the biggest mistake of my life." Rey's arm tightened around him reassuringly, as he said, "I'm not sure I'll ever forgive myself for missing out on ten years with you."

"You won't miss anymore," she said softly. "That's what matters."

"How can you just forgive me like that?" he breathed.

"I'm not sure," she admitted, "I don't think forgiveness is like a switch though."

He piqued an eyebrow but couldn't meet her eyes as he asked, "What do you mean?"

She shook her head, seemed to think better of it, and planted a single chilling kiss along his pectoral. "It's...it's like filling a pail of water. Sometimes, there were days where I couldn't even stand to hear your name. I'd take all those old shirts you'd given me and hide them in a corner of my closet and hope I could forget." There was a pause that Ben recognized as her steeling herself to admit to something very personal. "Other times...other times, I'd open up that box and think about everything you meant to me. At a certain point, years and years ago, I stopped being angry and started missing you full-time."

The room went silent except for the sound of their breathing.

"It was so stupid," he said quietly. "You remember the big argument we had over colleges, right?"

He felt Rey nod again, and continued speaking about his greatest shame, "I was just so worried that, if you picked a college by me instead of accepting the offer you got from Harvard, you'd end up regretting it and you'd resent me-"

"What's that got to do with why we broke up?" she interrupted, looking up at him. "I took your advice - I didn't  _want_  to be on different sides of the country, but we could have handled the long distance, you know."

She was stronger than he. So much stronger and yet she was the one who ended up paying for  _his_  poor decision.

"I couldn't," he admitted. He remembered the mental fog he'd retreated into back then and shuddered at the fragmented nightmare. "Rey, it...it was painful. I'd already dealt with being away from you my whole freshman year, and the idea of doing it for another three years  _killed_ me."

There'd been times he'd considered quitting and moving back home just to be with her again, but that would have chained her to him in a way that wouldn't have been healthy or fair to her.

"I just- I didn't know how to handle it, so I spent all my time buried in schoolwork, and when I took that internship under Snoke he demanded all my time and it was easier to just give it to him."

The man had been an ailing, decrepit old revenant - one of those individuals perpetually tied up in academia, draining the souls and spirits of students dry for his own purposes until discarding them for his next favorite toy. Ben had almost needed therapy and worked himself to severe malnutrition under his care, but working under the man had done what Ben had intended, which was kill his free time and his free mind, such that he couldn't remember Rey.

Except for those nights when he'd catch a hint of hazel on some students face, a hint that wasn't exactly Rey's, but close enough to shock his system into remembering everything he'd never really forgotten.

"Ben, for  _months_  all I got was a handful of messages and calls, and then it just stopped, and I didn't even know if we were over-"

Her voice was breaking, and Ben didn't flinch away this time, even if his chest felt like someone was slowly scooping his insides out with a rusty knife. He held her close and wished the same thing he'd wished for so many times - that he could take her pain away. Especially the pain that had been caused by him.

"I know. I  _know_ , Rey, and like I said, it was the biggest mistake of my life. It was selfish, and cruel, but every time I had to say goodbye to you it felt like my heart was breaking, and…" he took a deep breath, and said, "and it was somehow easier to just...not say goodbye again."

Easier and cowardly. Ben wasn't like a lot of his family members, and while he was normally okay with that, he couldn't help but wish he'd been stronger.

He kept going, because there was no place to go but forward - not with her in his arms and the past behind them. "Working with Snoke, it was easy to stay busy. That's why I stopped coming home, and I kept telling myself I'd come back to you, but three months became six, and six became a year, and a year became two and then three, and at some point I'd convinced myself you'd be too mad to want to see me, or hear from me."

Silence settled between them again for a few minutes, until he felt Rey's lips press against his chest.

"You'll never do that to me again, will you?" she asked in a small, vulnerable voice.

Ben swallowed hard and rolled over toward her, burying his face in her shoulder as he wrapped around her. "No, Rey," he sighed. "No. Never. I don't want to ever go another day without you."

"Good," she whispered. "Then it's mutual."

He smiled in the dark and kissed her skin before saying, "Y'know, Rey, while we're talking about serious stuff...my mother mentioned something to me this afternoon, and I think we should talk about it."

Rey pulled back gently, just far enough to prop herself up on her elbow, and she looked at him curiously. After a minute she winced. "Wait, tell me it's not about grandkids. Give it a year,  _maybe_ , but right now-"

"It's not about kids," he chuckled, "well, actually that came up, but that's not what I meant." He paused, and worked his lips together before blurting, "She asked if we wanted to move back here. I guess...I guess they need a permanent employee to help manage the garage since my father's not able to do much there now, and she offered me a job with Rebel Industries and-"

"Yes," Rey said suddenly.

Ben looked up at her like a deer in the headlights. "What?...really? I- I thought it'd take more convincing than that. I mean, Rey, this is a lot of change all at once, I don't expect you to just be okay with it all."

She snorted and grinned broadly as she said, "Ben, a week ago I was in a relationship with a guy I'm not sure I ever really even liked very much, and my job was... _well_ , let's say it wasn't going anywhere. Sure, it's a massive change to now suddenly be with the guy I've loved since I was a kid, being offered the only job I've ever enjoyed, but…" she shrugged, and her smile got even bigger as she sniffled, "But you don't question it when you win the lottery, right? You just celebrate and accept the positive change in your life. Why would I do anything else?"

His mouth fell open, and after a moment Ben shook his head slowly. "You're incredible, you know that? You'd really just be willing to leave everything behind in Chicago and move here?"

"What's left for me there, Ben? This is my home - I always wanted to come back to it eventually anyway," she admitted. "But, I don't work there anymore, and my name wasn't even on the lease at my last place. I'd love to move back-" she hesitated, and her eyes flashed up to meet his as she said quietly, "I'd love to live back here...with you."

"And this isn't happening too fast for you?" he asked, a bit afraid to hear the answer.

Rey reached up to run a hand through his hair as she said, "Not at all. If anything, it's all happening kinda later than I'd expected."

"I guess we  _do_  have a lot of lost time to make up for," he said, a bit sadly.

She smirked. "I know exactly how we can get started."

His eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head as he asked, "Oh?"

Rey scooted a bit closer and threw a leg over his hip as she whispered in his ear, "Think you can go for another round?"

Ben groaned.

This woman - this beautiful, amazing woman - was going to be the death of him.

* * *

Twelve Years Earlier

Dating Rey was as natural as breathing.

After a few months, Ben had started to realize that nothing had really changed between them. They still studied together, hung out at school together, spent basically as much time as possible together...nothing had changed, really.

Except now, he could hold her hand without worrying that she might not want him to. Now, he could lift her face up to his and kiss her without wondering if she minded, and without worrying if anyone was around to see them. Possibly the biggest difference, though, was that she kept him up at night - sometimes he'd catch himself lying in bed, wondering how he could have gotten so lucky.

Their parents hadn't been surprised. Not one bit.

Of course, Ben hadn't  _exactly_  planned on them finding out by catching them making out on his bed, but considering the somewhat-compromising position they'd been caught in, Han and Leia had been shockingly calm. Maz had just rolled her eyes when she found out, and muttered something about  _we're not idiots, y'know._

They'd been dating for almost a year when the subject of prom came up. As a Junior, Ben could attend and bring a guest, and he felt giddy at the chance to go with Rey. Sure, they'd gone on plenty of dates, but for some reason, knowing he didn't have to worry about having someone to go with was just... _wonderful._

At least, it was until she tearfully explained that Maz's somewhat-estranged sister had died, and though she'd never met the woman, she'd promised Maz she'd keep her company on the way to the funeral, which was being held in upstate New York. Long story short, Rey explained sadly, they'd be gone from Friday afternoon until sometime Sunday, and she'd miss Saturday evening's prom.

Ben understood. He really, really did. When she told him, he'd kissed away her tears, and hugged her tightly, promising that they'd have more opportunities in the future. Because, the thing was, he was confident that was the truth. There was no doubt in his mind that they'd be together a year from then, and they'd have another chance. So he didn't buy tickets, and instead, talked Poe out of trying to stay home to keep him company (the guy was more than likely going to end up being Prom King, and who was Ben to stand in the way of that absurdity?).

That was how Ben found himself in old sweatpants and a t-shirt, watching Indiana Jones on a Saturday night. Even his parents had gone out for the night.

He was moping. Definitely moping.

Ben sighed, and slouched down further into the couch, and half-watched the movie until he fell asleep.

At which point, he was promptly woken up by the doorbell.

Who the fuck rang a doorbell past 9PM?

He grumbled, half-yelling-half-muttering at the person who was obnoxious enough to ring the bell. It was probably Poe, having forgotten his key, and Ben had half a mind to let the guy suffer out on the front porch for a while.

But then he caught a glimpse of a light pink floaty knee-length dress, wrapped around a tan-skinned, freckle-covered girl through the glass in the front door, and his heart rate doubled. He stopped muttering  _immediately_ and swung the door open, asking in a confused (but happy) voice, " _Rey?"_

Her hair hung in soft curls that went to her bare shoulders, and she gave him a quick look over before grinning. "We got home a bit early. Maz wasn't happy with the hotel, and the weather was  _terrible_ , and she decided we should just drive back-"

Rey didn't get the chance to fully explain, because he'd caught her by the waist and pulled her inside, slotting his lips over hers while she gasped in surprise against him. After a moment she let out a soft giggle, and pulled away, blushing.

"Uh, hi," she said shyly.

He grinned. "Hi." Then he thought for a moment and said, "So, uh.  _Crap._  I never bought tickets since I didn't think you'd be here, and-"

"Oh, we're not going to prom," Rey snorted. "I have something else in mind."

Ben paused to take a deep, calming breath. Yeah, the house was empty, but  _surely_  he was misinterpreting...he really  _hoped_  he wasn't, but there was no way she was ready-

She grabbed his hand and said, "Follow me."

He gulped, and let her pull him through the house. Unexpectedly, they went right past the stairs, and ended up in a sitting room, which was only lit by the dim glow of a lamp by the corner. Rey walked over to his parent's sound system, and removed a disc from the small purse she'd brought, then popped it in the CD-player.

A song he recognized started playing, and she turned back to flash him a smile, and held out her hand. "Dance with me?"

He- he was in a t-shirt and sweatpants, and this gorgeous angel of a girl was in a strapless light-pink dress and she looked like a dream, and  _oh what the hell was she doing dating him?_

Rey seemed to sense his hesitation, and she said quietly, "C'mon, Ben, this is way better than prom. We can dance for a bit, then I can steal some of your pajamas, and we can spend the rest of the night eating ice cream and watching movies."

She was right. That sounded infinitely better than prom.

So Ben took her hand, and held her close while they swayed to the music.


	10. Dress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: There's sex in the flashback, and Rey's 17. It's not super descriptive and I didn't want to tag this as underage because there's nothing illegal about the situation since there's a very small age difference. I just wanted to warn anyone who may be uncomfortable with the idea.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy the fluff!
> 
> PS: Special thanks to the lovely, talented [ stories_in_my_head ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stories_in_my_head/pseuds/stories_in_my_head), who helped make the Leia scene even more cringey. If you haven't read her fic "Sense and Insensibility" you absolutely should. Actually, just go read all her stuff.

Rey propped herself up on her elbows and glanced down at the empty spot next to her. Sometime around 8 AM, Ben had kissed her awake, reluctantly explaining that he'd told Leia he'd go into Rebel Industries to meet with one of her higher-ups. It seemed Leia had been dead serious about offering him a job, and Rey had watched with hope welling in her chest as Ben grabbed his laptop and typed out a letter of resignation for his miserable job.

It was really happening.

_Holy shit._

He'd paused for a moment just after typing out the email to his boss, then looked over at her and smiled softly, just before hitting send.

Rey had nearly tackled him after that, in a joyful, playful, giggling kiss - the type she hadn't given him since they were teens.

"It's really happening," she'd whispered against his shoulder.

Ben had hugged her tighter, and said, "Yeah, it really is."

He'd left for Rebel Industries not long after, promising to be home for lunch, and Rey had fallen back to sleep for another hour.

Eventually, she pulled herself out of bed and trodded down to the kitchen, where she found Leia leaning against a counter with a mug of coffee, sipping it while in deep thought. When she heard Rey she perked up, and gestured to the fresh pot that sat waiting.

While Rey poured herself a mug, Leia spoke up.

"Sweetheart, I have to tell you, it's so wonderful to see you and Ben together again. Yesterday, after you two came back," Leia paused, and grinned slyly, "Don't think I didn't notice you leave, by the way. Anyway, once you came back I caught him staring at you while you were having pictures taken, and  _oh_  it was just the sweetest thing. He looked like someone had hit him over the head, and he just said,  _Mom, I'm gonna marry her,_  and-

The woman's words were cut short as Rey nearly dropped her mug. "He said that?" she whispered, eyes wide.

They...they hadn't exactly discussed that part, had they? Were they engaged for real now? Not that Rey had any problem with that. She'd just sort of missed the memo, apparently.

Leia furrowed her brows. "Well,  _yes_ , aren't you engaged?"

_Maybe?_

Rey took a deep breath, saying, "Yes, yeah, of course, I just-" she sighed. "I guess it's just nice to hear."

Leia smiled, and said, "Well, Ben said you didn't have plans for the day, so I was hoping you could humor me on something."

"Sure," Rey shrugged. Leia had managed to make it this far without mentioning grandchildren, so maybe there was hope for her yet. "What'd you have in mind?"

"Well, my good friend - do you remember Amilyn?" Leia waited for Rey's nod, and continued, "She retired from a high-stress job and now she runs this cute little wedding dress shop in town. Would you want to go? Obviously you'd probably want to wait for Maz to get back before buying, one, but Han mentioned that Ben said you're thinking of getting married this winter, so it might be nice to get an idea of what style you might want."

Rey's heart nearly stopped.  _This winter?_

"Oh, he told Han?" she asked breathily. "Can I ask - when did he mention that?"

Leia frowned, thinking it over. "Well, sometime before the wedding."

 _Before the wedding_...back when there were no strings.

"Han said he sounded so happy," Leia sighed.

He'd known, even then. _Oh._

Something squeezed around Rey's heart, and she had to take a moment to wipe the corners of her eyes. After a moment, she cleared her throat and said softly, "Yeah, Leia, let's look at some dresses."

* * *

Amilyn's shop was  _beautiful_ , but not nearly as lovely as the dress she'd thrust into Rey's arms. Oddly enough, even though she'd been engaged...oh, gosh, less than a week earlier, she'd never actually done any wedding planning. She'd never considered what sort of wedding dress she'd want, and when she'd told the violet-haired woman that, Amilyn had tutted, taken one look at her, and pulled a dress out for her to try on.

After a considerable amount of help getting the back done-up, she'd stepped out into the shop's showroom and waited nervously for the women's opinions.

Amilyn had simply nodded approvingly, but Leia?  _Oh_ , Leia had started to tear up.

"Come see it in the mirrors," Amilyn suggested, guiding Rey toward the mirrors that were set up by the shop's front windows. "What do you think?"

Before Rey could give her opinion, a mop of dark hair had caught her attention through the window, and for some reason, she turned.

That was when she saw Ben.

He was standing outside the shop, eyes wide, while his lips curled into a soft smile. He stared at her for a moment before slowly glancing toward the shop's door. As if in a trance, he took a few steps toward it and let himself in, walking over to Rey.

"Hey," he breathed. His eyes traveled down over the dress Amilyn had put her in, and his expression turned to one of awe.

Much to Rey's surprise, the woman had picked a shorter dress that fell to her knees, and it had a 1950's vintage feel with a full tulle skirt and a bodice covered in lace.

"Benny, you weren't supposed to meet us here until noon," Leia scolded. "It's back luck to see the dress before the wedding, you know!"

Ben managed a faint laugh and nodded, "Sorry, the meeting went really well, and it ended early, so I wanted to come see what you were up to. I didn't realize you'd decided to look at dresses."

"It's like your prom dress," Ben added. "Just...white."

"And with lace," Rey mentioned. Then she paused, and smiled. "You remember the dress I wore to our not-prom?"

"Of course I do," he smiled. "You should get it. If you like it."

Rey blinked, and noticed with relief that Leia and Amilyn had, at some point, walked over to another rack of dresses, likely in an attempt to give them some privacy. "So, uh...your mother said something about us having a winter wedding?"

"Oh." Ben's jaw dropped. "Right.  _Shit_. I forgot I told dad that." He worried his bottom lip between his teeth and said, "I'm sorry, I'll talk to him, I-"

Rey hadn't been entirely sure how she felt about it until she'd seen the look on his face through the dress-shop's window. Maybe she should have been freaking out a bit, but she just... _wasn't_. If anything, it felt like she'd been waiting her whole life to end up with Ben Solo.

It just made sense.

"Don't," she interrupted. His eyes flashed up to hers, as she repeated softly, "Don't. Winter sounds good."

* * *

Rey paced back and forth across the bedroom floor as she waited for Rose to pick up the phone. She'd been a terrible friend to Rose the past few days, replying to concerned texts with one or two word answers - not explaining what was  _actually_ going on, and now it was time to remedy the situation.

She wasn't entirely sure how Rose would react, especially since Rey couldn't remember ever mentioning Ben to her. Telling Finn had been one thing...he'd been there when she'd been just barely getting past the worst of it, and she'd still felt raw enough to spill the story over a bottle, but she'd met Rose somewhere around the 5 year post-Ben mark, and she'd been more guarded at that point.

Suddenly the ringing stopped, and a kind, friendly voice answered, "I was  _wondering_  when you'd call! What, didya finally sober up from the plane?" she asked, giggling. "What's it been, five days?"

"Has it really only been five days?" Rey breathed. "Wow. Huh."

The woman on the other end of the phone hesitated. "You sound weird. What's up?"

_May as well dive in and tell her._

"I'm getting married."

There was a moment of silence before Rose said, "Oh, honey, no. Remember? Snap cheated on you. You  _can't_ get back together, Rey, you deserve so much better, and-"

"No, not Snap," she interrupted. "Uh...Ben, actually."

Rey waited for the woman to ask  _Rey, who's Ben, and have you lost your mind_ , but instead, Rose's voice filled with quiet anger. "Wait," she said slowly, " _Ben Solo?_  LIke, your adorable childhood best friend, first everything, guy you probably compare all other guys to, broke your heart when he moved across the country and never came home,  _Ben?"_

Her throat went dry. "Uh...I told you about that?"

"You were super drunk," Rose admitted. "And holy  _shit_  Rey, what the hell's going on?!"

"I love him," she whispered. "It's kind of a long story, but-"

"Rey," her friend said dryly, "this is totally insane. I think I need to hear the full story."

* * *

Eleven Years Earlier

Rey had  _finally_  finished her Junior year when Han offered her a summer job at his garage, and in an attempt to forget that her boyfriend would be leaving for college on the other side of the country in fewer than three months, she threw herself into the work.

She  _loved_  it, and what she loved even more was the fact that Ben was always there right at the end of her shift to take her home, wait around while she showered and changed, and then he'd take her on a date. Half their "dates" involved fooling around in the treehouse, or at the nearby lake, but Rey couldn't have cared less where they were. Ben could take her on a date at the garage for all she cared, though she expected Han may have had an opinion or two about that.

Ben was due to show up around 3PM, so when Leia arrived just before 2:50PM and waved her over to the car, Rey was a bit surprised. She frowned for a split-second before greeting the woman warmly, and was again surprised when Leia said, "Hop in, dear. I asked Ben to get a few things from the store and he'll be a little while. I was hoping I could take you home so we could have a little talk."

 _That_  idea made Rey nervous.

She'd been avoiding Leia for a solid week, since the woman had come home  _considerably_  earlier than her and Ben had expected, and  _oh,_  Rey had nearly died of embarrassment. It wasn't every day your boyfriend's mom, who'd known you since you were eight, caught you on your knees in front of her son, in her own living room. Rey turned red and groaned at the thought as she reluctantly climbed into Leia's car.

"Oh, relax," the woman laughed, apparently able to read minds, "You have nothing to be embarrassed about, but I  _do_ think we should talk. I know you've been avoiding me and I wanted to make sure you know I'm not mad or…" she shrugged, "or anything, really. Relax, dear. Let's get home, have some cookies and lemonade, and talk, okay?"

Rey bit her lip before glancing over at the woman, and finally sighed, then buckled herself in.

This was  _truly_  not how she'd expected her afternoon to go.

Within twenty minutes, she was sitting on the Solo-Organa's back porch with a glass of chilled homemade lemonade and some of her mother's own cookies. Leia sat across from her, and gave her a warm and understanding smile.

"Rey, you know you're like a daughter to me, right?"

 _That_  got her attention. Somehow, after almost a decade, she still couldn't believe these kind, wonderful people cared enough about her to just...welcome her into their homes. What had she ever done to deserve so much love? The least she could to was return it, and allow Leia this conversation, no matter how awkward it felt.

So she smiled softly, and nodded.

"Can I ask you a few questions?" Leia asked hesitantly. "You don't have to answer, but I haven't talked to Maz about things because I... _well_ , I wanted you to know you could talk to me, and have our conversations remain between us."

Rey's tension relaxed a bit, and she said, "Thanks. And, uh…" she took a deep breath, "sure. You can ask me things."

Leia smiled at her, and took a sip of lemonade before her face scrunched up ever-so-slightly as she asked, "Are you having sex?"

A red-hot flush bloomed across Rey's cheeks the moment the words slipped from the woman's mouth, and she instantly looked down at the table. "No," she said quietly.

Truth be told, Rey  _had_  planned to bring it up to Ben soon. Actually, part of her was wondering why he'd never really suggested it before. They'd certainly gotten close, but...

Leia seemed to exhale a sigh of relief. "That's good - not that you shouldn't, but I was hoping I'd get to talk to you first. I don't know if you  _plan_  to have sex any time soon, but...do you have condoms? Do you know how to use them properly? They still teach that in school, right?" She frowned just as Rey started slowly dying inside, and glanced back toward the door toward the kitchen, "I might have a banana-"

"I  _really_ hope you don't," Rey muttered.

"Well," Leia smirked, " _bananas_  come in many different shapes and sizes, so it can be tricky to know how to properly put condoms on, and I'm thinking I could demonstrate-"

"Oh, God, no," Rey finally blurted out. "I know about condoms, please don't demonstrate."

Leia chuckled, "Well I hope you do because if Ben is anything like his father-"

"I beg you not to finish that sentence," Rey said quickly.

But Leia ignored her and kept going anyway, "Han  _said_  it was all set but, well, Ben was born nine months later, so," the woman shrugged. "Always good to have a backup method. Are you planning to start birth control at some point? Not that you should use it as a reason to not use condoms,  _of course_ , but, well, I did always think it was better without...though, condoms  _are_ the best way to protect from disease, not that that's a major concern for either of you considering-"

Rey moaned, and let her head fall down onto the table in front of her. "Leia," she whined, "if I promise to remain a virgin for the rest of my life, will you stop talking?"

The woman let out a low chuckle. "I  _highly_  doubt you'd pull off celibacy. Do you have any idea how many times Han or I have almost walked in on you two?"

"Please don't tell me," Rey groaned. "Just, box my ears or something, okay?"

Leia laughed, and scolded, "Oh, stop being silly. There's nothing to be embarrassed about. Sex is natural, and fun," she laughed again when Rey let out another soft whine, "And you and Ben have been together for a long time. You certainly shouldn't feel pressured to, but if you wanted to, there's nothing wrong-"

Suddenly the door into the house opened behind them, and Rey jerked back to see-

Ben. It was Ben.

 _Oh God,_ hopefully he hadn't heard any of that.

Rey couldn't tell if the blood had drained from her face or rushed to it, but when she turned back to Leia, the woman was just smiling sweetly as if she hadn't just caused Rey enough stress to start going gray decades too early. "Benny, did you get what I put on the list?"

Ben blinked, and Rey noticed a bit of a blush on his cheeks. "Uh...yeah."

"Good," she nodded, glancing back to Rey, "Thanks for the talk, dear." She grinned, and sipped at her lemonade, "Just remember, I'm always here if you need anything."

Jumping up from her chair in a rush, Rey said a quick, " _Thanks,_ " and rushed back into the house, dragging Ben behind her by his hand. She ignored his semi-amused protests and didn't say a word until they were in his room with the door closed.

"Sorry," she said quickly, "I just- your mom. That was weird. Very weird."

Ben groaned, "Oh, no, she got to you, too? She sat me down for a  _talk_  this morning." His face paled as he said in a horrified whisper, "I never want to have a talk like that again." His grip tightened around the brown paper bag he held, and its crinkling seemed to remind him of its contents, "Oh right. She actually sent me to buy condoms, by the way."

"Well, she tried to demonstrate their usage for me," Rey said dryly. "I think you got the better end of that deal."

"I don't think you'd be saying that if you'd been there for  _my_  talk," he muttered. "You know, she kept saying I better be  _reciprocating_. How was I supposed to respond to that? Either I lie and say  _please stop talking, I'd never do that_ and let her scold me, or I end up admitting to her that it's like, my favorite thing ever and that's just  _not_  something you tell your mom, but-"

Suddenly giggles burst from Rey's lips. Seeing him so flustered was somehow calming, and, if she was honest, completely hilarious. He rolled his eyes at her and shook his head, grinning. Then he said in a shy, low voice, "Well, as long as you know where I stand on this stuff, I guess we're okay."

"And where do you stand?" Rey asked quietly, biting her lip.

Realistically, she knew it was probably a ridiculously stupid question, especially considering the fact that he was eighteen, obviously very attracted to her, and  _very_  interested in putting his hands or mouth all over her whenever he got the chance, but it was still something she felt the need to ask.

He looked at her curiously, as if he was surprised she didn't already know. "Well, I want to, obviously, if you want to. I love you," he shrugged, "and you're my best friend, and we have that silly pact to be each other's first  _everything,_ and-"

Before he finished his sentence, she'd lifted herself up on her toes, and caught his lips in a kiss.

"I want to, too," she murmured against his lips.

Ben pulled back for a moment, and a wide smile broke out across his face. "Really?"

"Yeah," she nodded, "Just...maybe not while your mom's home, okay?"

* * *

It was less than a week later, while Ben's house was empty, when they stumbled out of their clothes and she let Ben pick her up and carry her off to his room. He lowered her gently onto his bed, and covered her body in kisses, and for a little while, it was hilariously awkward as he managed to find several new ticklish spots on her with his soft lips.

It seemed his goal was to kiss every one of her freckles, and while impatient, she couldn't bring herself to rush the process.

Not long after, it evolved into something more serious as he held her close, and kissed her deeply, both of them murmuring  _I love you_ 's as her discomfort at the new sensation slowly became pleasure. At some point, Rey looked up at him, admiring his sculpted chest and shoulders, and his dark hair hanging down around them like a curtain, and she happened to catch a glimpse of his gorgeous dark eyes, staring down into hers.

That was when she'd decided she'd found her new favorite activity to partake in with her best friend.

When they did it again a bit later, after a lot of cuddling, he sat up and took her in his lap, and Rey moved her hips while he worked his fingers against the bundle of nerves they'd paid attention to on plenty of occasions before. Ben ended up spending the whole time kissing her so the neighbors wouldn't hear the sort of lewd noises that would have otherwise escaped her mouth.

Later that afternoon, while they were curled up in his bed, resting in each other's arms, Ben whispered, "Hey, Rey, you know how much I love you, right?"

She smiled, and nodded against his chest.

"I'm just really nervous about leaving for college," he admitted. "You'd been right here my whole life and…" he took in a deep breath, "I'm nervous. About us. About not having you next door."

"I know," she said softly. "I am too, but we'll be fine, I promise."

Ben looked down at her and smiled. "Want to make a pact?"

"You know," she mused, "the last time I made a pact with you I ended up losing my virginity. Like, a couple hours ago. What do you want from me now?"

His cheeks turned as red as Maz's roses, and he let out a bashful laugh. "Uh, right...well, I'm just...I'm worried about this, okay? About college, and us being apart for so long. So, how about this. If we aren't married by the time we turn thirty-"

" _Ben Solo_ ," she interrupted in mock surprise (despite the fact that she was actually quite surprised), "Are you trying to rope me into a  _marriage pact?"_  Rey threw her head back against a pillow in laughter and said, "You're ridiculous. Of course you're going to be married before then."

When she noticed the smile on his face fade, she snorted and said, "Idiot. I meant to me. You really think I'd let you end up with anyone else?"

"Oh," he exhaled softly, and Rey could have sworn she heard his heart pound twice as fast, "So, then, you agree to the pact?"

She pretended to think about it for approximately thirty seconds before rolling her eyes.

"Sure," she giggled. "If for some stupid reason, we haven't married each other by the time we turn thirty, I'll marry you, but I absolutely  _refuse_  to have a big wedding, and you have to promise to take me somewhere nice for the honeymoon. And uh…" she smirked, "You'll have to do that thing with your tongue. A lot."

Something about the brilliant smile on his face made her heart beat a bit faster, and he said, "Sounds perfect."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	11. Three Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay - we've been focused on Equilibrium's chapter 38!
> 
> You may notice the chapter count's gone up - Chapter 12 will be an Epilogue, and it will _not_ have a flashback because I'm simply not interested in writing any sort of breakup angst in a happy fluff fic. The past is in the past, and Rey and Ben are considerably more interested in their future. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"He did  _what?"_

Rey quickly pulled the phone away from her ear as her friend practically screamed into the receiver on the other end of the line. Ben had left early with Leia to take care of some paperwork at Rebel Inc. and this (sadly) left Rey alone at the house that morning.

Suddenly, she was starting to regret her decision to call Rose.

"Well, it's definitely not a problem  _anymore._ " Rey winced, "But he kinda, sorta told his parents  _I_  was the woman he was bringing home, and since my parents thought I was bringing home my fiance-"

Rose couldn't seem to decide between being scandalized or laughing as she then said, "Oh my  _God_ , let me guess, they assumed you guys were engaged?!"

"Yep."

"And, you didn't think to correct them?" Rose asked, her unbidden snickers coming through loud and clear, "That's fucking ridiculous. It's like the plot of some stupid rom-com."

"I know," Rey groaned. It  _really_  did. "And what's worse, I agreed to play along."

"No!" Rose gasped, but Rey could hear her breathless disbelieving laughter seep through.

"Yes!" Rey said, "So, we started sharing a bed again and acting all couple-y, and everyone kept acting like they weren't surprised at all and and and-" Rey took a deep breath before continuing, "And it brought back  _so_  many feelings, Rose. Things I'd tried  _so_  hard to forget, but...when I saw him at that airport it was like it all came back to me. Like we were back at prom and he-  _Ugh."_  
  
Rey flopped onto the bed and turned her face into the pillow and let out a frustrated, yet absolutely happy mewl.

She turned her head back to the phone, and to her wonderfully patient, (and very giggly friend), "And then Ben and I got caught in this weird flirty game where we tried to mess with each other to see who would embarrass first-"

"Oh," Rose snorted, "I would have  _loved_  to be a fly on the wall for that."

Rey bit her lip and snickered, "I may have implied that he had a daddy kink. In front of his parents."

The line went silent for a moment, and Rey frowned. "Rose? You still there?"

"Yeah," her friend said quickly, "Sorry, I'm just- you're  _killing me_  over here. Rey, this is…" she laughed again, "this is  _priceless_. So uh, who won that game?"

"I think I did?" Rey shrugged. "I'm not really sure actually, but it led to a lot of sex, so…"

Rose snorted, "Of  _course_  it did. So, when did the whole  _we're getting married for real_  thing happen? And, seriously, I can't believe this," she cracked up, "I leave you to yourself for  _one week_  and you go decide to marry someone. It's like I'm in the Twilight Zone."

"Oh, right.  _That_. So, after the uh-"

"Sex?" Rose offered, dryly.

Part of Rey dearly wanted to detail every explicit and indecent act Rey and Ben had gotten up to just so her friend would stop being so damn smug, but Rey didn't have nearly enough wine in her for  _that_ kind of conversation.

"Yeah," Rey said instead. She still blushed, even though her friend wasn't there in person to give her crap for it. "After that he said we should get on the same page, and," she sighed, "I guess we were. We both admitted we hadn't stopped loving each other."

Her friend paused for a moment, before saying softly, "Are you happy?"

"So happy," Rey breathed. Then she remembered a rather important detail she'd left out of her earlier explanation. She winced again. "Actually, I think we're going to move here. We both already have jobs lined up."

Random bouts of fortune seemed to be a common feature in her life recently. Truth be told, it all seemed to have started after running into Ben at the airport. Admittedly, that may have been the afterglow after trying on the wedding dress speaking, but Rey was certain it had to do with Ben's reappearance in her life.

"Wow, Rey...that seems so fast." Rose hesitated, and sighed, "Well, I might have to kick his ass a bit for being such an asshole last time, but...if you're happy, I'm happy for you."

Rose probably wasn't kidding about the ass-kicking part. Rey had seen her haul people twice her size out on the street if they got too handsy with anyone she liked. Snap had been victim to one of those instances too, after he started being a real jackass about something meaningless that truly didn't seem all that important anymore.

She knew she probably should have been on Ben's side, but Rey couldn't help but smile at the image of Rose trying to take on Ben. She'd have to stop her friend from going too far, but she could just imagine the look on Ben's face.

"I am, Rose," she replied at last, smiling broadly. "Unbelievably happy. But uh… I have a favor to ask of you."

"Need me to get your stuff from that jerkwad and ship it up there? I'd  _love_  to see him again. Maybe give him a nice punch, or maybe-"

"Rose!" Rey interrupted, giggling, "No, though now that you mention it, I think I might owe Snap a  _thank you_ , considering how things worked out. But no, what I wanted to ask you…" she bit her lip, and asked quietly, "Would you be my maid of honor?"

She heard Rose gasp and squeal away from the phone, and after a moment, her voice came back on, a restrained giddy energy to her that Rey had been feeling for days, since she and Ben had had that talk.

"Of course I will!" Rose exclaimed, "When's the wedding? I need to reserve a plane ticket and I want to come up there for a  _week_  and-"

"Um, funny thing," Rey interjected, feeling nervous despite the other girl's enthusiasm, "It's pretty soon. Umm. We're thinking January, so...three months. Ish. We haven't really set a date."

"...what?" Rose's voice had gone flat with shock. Rey couldn't imagine why. It wasn't like  _that_  was the most shocking thing she'd told her, right?

"Yeah. January. I mean with the way things with Han are going...and Ben's been  _so_ sweet and Rose he saw me in my dress already and  _oh_ you should have seen the look on his-"

"You have a dress already?" There was alarm in Rose's voice, "When did this happen?"

"Um. Yesterday?" Rey swallowed and decided to explain, or rather to throw her future mother-in-law (bless the woman) under the bus. That's what in-laws did right? "So, yesterday she dragged me to the store and Amilyn - that's her friend, who owns the place- started showing me all these dresses and  _god_  Rose they were all so wonderful and so gorgeous but the one I picked I-"

She was starting to babble, and the sudden and rather scary silence from the other end of the line had Rey doubting her friend had heard any of it. When she didn't get a response she stopped her exposition and tentatively called, into the phone, "Hey Rose? You there?"

There was some shuffling on the other end before her friend's voice came back on, crystal clear. "Sorry about that!" Rose said, and Rey frowned. She could hear the forced cheer as clearly as she could mentally picture Ben's abs (and  _boy_ did he have abs). "I had to check something. I forgot I was supposed to book a flight yesterday. My sister's coming from overseas and we were meeting up." There was a pause. "Yeah, we're meeting up. Say, where are you guys again? I need to start um, planning, yeah, planning for winter wear there."

"We're a couple hours drive from Boston," Rey said, curious about her friend's suddenly weird behavior.

"Awesome. Peachy. Great!" Rose said, iterating her three favorite words for situations that actually were the exact opposite. "Um, gotta go."

Rey blinked dumbly at the screen that indicated an ended call before tossing it and throwing herself back onto the pillow. Ben had  _certainly_  been good at tiring her out over the last few days.

She went back to sleep thinking of his broad shoulders and how safe she felt in his arms.

* * *

Ben watched patiently as Poe started pacing across his own living room floor. Finn was still sitting, but he was shooting Ben an odd, possibly alarming look that he didn't really know how to interpret.

"I guess I'm just confused," Poe said finally.

Ben frowned. "Why? You're my brother, and you're probably half the reason I ever dared to be honest about my feelings for Rey when we were kids, so, why wouldn't I want you to be my best man?"

"I feel like I just walked into a movie theatre and missed the first two hours of the show," Poe said, a little flatly, "Why? Because honestly man, this is a little much."

Ben stared at his brother, bewildered. "What?"

"Dude…" Finn paused, "Okay, I'm sorry, you're a nice guy and all, but someone's gotta say it. There's a limit to how far you should take this, and wedding planning is definitely crossing the line."

"Well, I mean, I know it's a little fast," Ben said, suddenly on the defensive, "but we're both consenting adults, and we think a winter-"

"Not that," Finn waved Ben's explanations off with a dismissive wave, "I'm talking about this...this...chicanery you've got going on!"

"You been reading the  _word a day_  thing again?" Poe asked his boyfriend, an amused grin on his face.

"Hush you," Finn said without looking away, "He's  _your_  brother and this is entirely too much like one of your stupid plans."

"Dude. Not cool." Poe shot a faintly wounded look at Finn before looking away and winking at Ben. What for, he didn't know.

"Anyways," Finn said, "I think, if Rey means anything to you as a friend, you need to consider her feelings a bit more carefully. Asking her to play along with this much longer is kinda cruel, if you ask me."

It took him a moment, but Finn's words finally clicked, and Ben groaned at his own stupidity, "Of course Rey told you. I should have known. Sorry, there's been a misunderstanding. Uhm," he hesitated, and then grinned, "I know this started off as us pretending, but actually, a lot's changed in the last couple of days."

He supposed that starting off with the truth about their relationship would have been the smart thing to do, but his father had practically raised him on the pithy aphorism of  _flying by the seat of your pants ain't never been boring_  and so, Ben had forgone logical thought as usual.

"Changed?" Poe perked up. "Whoa. Wait. Hold on. You actually did it, didn't you? You told her?"

Ben nodded, smiling up at the man. "We've been together most of the time we've been back. We're even moving back here - I'm taking a job with mom, and Rey's going to help Chewie keep the garage running."

"Holy shit," Finn breathed. "You actually proposed? Like, for real?"

Ah,  _there_ was the reaction he was looking for earlier.

"Oh." Ben sat back in his seat and thought about it. "Uh, actually... _shit_ , no, I guess I didn't. I mean-" he ran a hand through his hair and let out a long breath, "We just agreed to a wedding this winter and she got a dress, so I  _assumed_ -"

There was a word for people like him. It was probably located somewhere between  _dense_  and  _dumbass_  in the Ben Solo descriptive dictionary.

"Nope," Poe interrupted, "Nope, don't even think about it. This is Rey, dude. C'mon.  _Rey."_

Ben raised an eyebrow and his response was said with the perfect sarcastic tone his mother had used on them both growing up. "Yeah, I get it. I know her name. I'm getting married to her, you know."

"Not if you don't do it right, you're not." Poe asserted, crossing his arms. "You've loved her for, what, almost twenty years? I don't care if you've agreed to get married this weekend, you've gotta ask her for real."

Finn nodded approvingly. "I agree. Even if you've talked about it, you should still ask. Plus, you've got to make it extra romantic for all the bullcrap you two pulled with each other since you got back together. Which was...when, exactly?" Finn asked, seeming confused.

Ben cleared his throat and awkwardly corrected them. "Uh, a couple days ago."

The look they both sent him told Ben he probably shouldn't have said that.

"Like...during the wedding?" Finn asked finally, "Wait, wasn't she in the wedding party? How'd you two even have time to-"

Ben swallowed and did not blush. "People were busy."

Poe shook his head in wonder and chuckled. "Yeah, and I bet you two were  _busy_  too." He used finger quotes to stress that word. "And here I thought  _I_ was the troublemaker between the two of us."

A glare was the only thing Poe got in response to that.

"Y'know, mom invited us to a family dinner tonight," Poe commented. "Might be a good time to do it."

Ben sucked in a breath. He  _had_  spent a lot of time in the past thinking of various ways to ask her, and now that he thought of it, the idea of never actually asking  _was_ a bit disappointing.

"Okay," he nodded. "Okay, I'll do it. Tonight."

Finn looked between Ben and Poe and groaned, holding his head in his hands. "I don't care if you're not technically related, I totally see the family resemblance."

* * *

Poe and Finn were acting  _weird_ , Rey decided. She knew she wasn't always the most observant person, but the minute the family had sat down to dinner they'd started randomly staring over at Ben, looking at him expectantly.

Something was up.

After interrupting dinner a couple of times to politely ask, " _What on earth is up with you guys?"_  only to be shrugged at, she gave up and instead, noticed the subtle blush creep up on Ben's face.

It was odd, but she didn't think much of it until halfway through their meal when he took one look at the glass of amber liquid Poe had handed him, drank it in one gulp, and then took a deep breath.

She watched curiously as he stood up and pulled his chair away from the table, and her heart nearly stopped when he, for the second time that week, got down on one knee.

"Rey, I guess I probably already know the answer," he stammered, "But I thought the question deserved asking, just to be sure."

He cleared his throat and said softly as the rest of the table watched, "I don't think there's been a moment since we met that I haven't loved you. I loved you when you punched a bully for me when we were kids, and I loved you when you grabbed my hand at that stupid scary movie Poe dragged us to. I loved you when you asked me to be your first kiss - I loved you before we had to count to three just to work up the nerve to tell each other how we felt. I loved you when you decided to host a private prom for us."

The tears only started falling from her eyes as he whispered, "I loved you the day I kissed all of your freckles, and when I saw you in that airport bar last week, I finally figured out that I'd never stopped loving you. You just...you looked like  _home_ , Rey, and I don't know why it took me so long to remember that you'll always be that for me."

He seemed to search her face for an answer, but he hadn't even asked yet, so he continued, saying quietly, "What do you think about following through on that pact?"

Rey exhaled slowly, pulled herself together, and then said slyly, after a bit of sniffling, "I'm assuming you remember the terms you agreed to?"

A moment later, his mouth gaped, and he turned even more red. "Uh...yeah," he chuckled, "Yeah, I do."

"Well then, it's a yes," she laughed, nodding enthusiastically.

"Yeah?" Ben could feel the grin slowly stretching across his face.

"Yeah," she whispered.

All of a sudden, he stood, picking her up out of her seat along the way so their faces were almost at the same level, and he crashed his lips to meet hers, kissing with more fervor than ever, and that was when Rey knew for sure.

So many years ago, she'd thought nobody would ever kiss her the way Ben did.

She'd been right.

They only split apart once Han spoke up, saying in a confused, grumpy tone, "Will someone tell me what the hell is going on? I thought you two were already engaged. And what's this about an airport bar?"

Leia just looked on with a lot of amusement, and a hint of curiosity, while Poe and Finn were both beaming.

Rey paused for a moment and then started laughing, and buried her head in Ben's shoulder. "Han, it's a really complicated story."

"You can say that again," Finn snorted.

Poe laughed, and said, "That's okay, it'll be a hell of a story to tell people."

"I've loved you my whole life," Ben breathed, ignoring the commentary. "There's nothing complicated about that."

Rey blushed and kissed him again before someone cleared their throat, and her and Ben finally settled back into their seats. Then she said casually, "This might sound silly, but now that it's for real I wish we weren't waiting until winter."

Leia hummed and said, "Well, you know, the waiting period for a marriage license in this state is three days."

Ben dropped his fork and turned to Rey, eyes wide. "I think we've waited long enough," he breathed, "Think you can handle waiting three more days?"

After a stunned moment, she felt a wide smile grow across her face. "Yeah. Yeah, I can wait three days." She paused as reality settled in, and she said, "Oh, wow, we need to tell my mom, and Chewie. Leia, can you help me pull a wedding together that quickly? Just something small. Family only, plus my friend Rose, since I asked her to be my maid of honor?"

She looked up to find the woman wearing a huge smile. "I thought you'd never ask."

* * *

Ten Years Earlier

Prom was lame, they decided. The music was too loud, there weren't nearly enough slow songs, and while they had fun dancing, Rey simply wasn't interested in sticking around for her senior prom for another few hours, so they'd ditched an hour in and ended up going home.

It was Ben who suggested a walk around the neighborhood, and he spent a good portion of it talking about the West Coast. The way he talked about it made Rey wonder if he'd ever come back after college, but she could get used to the West Coast, especially for Ben.

Rey had even gotten into colleges there, and her plan had been to accept one of their offers so she'd be close to him. They'd talked excitedly about the sort of apartment they'd get together as soon as she was allowed to live off campus, and they'd...well, they'd made  _plans._

But that was all forgotten as soon as she'd gotten her last acceptance, when Ben had put his foot down, and it had blown up into their first real argument. She'd gotten into her dream school, not an hour from home, and he simply loved her too much to let her turn down the opportunity. So she'd gotten angry, but eventually, once they'd calmed down, she'd understood. That only seemed to make it even harder.

Now her excitement was mixed with a sudden overwhelming sense of dread, knowing their one year of long-distance would become three, or possibly four, if Ben chose to say on the West Coast after his graduation.

"Hey Ben," she interrupted softly, wincing, "I love hearing about this stuff, but...can we talk about something else? I'm…" she hesitated, and said, "I guess I'm still trying not to think too much about it."

He looked over at her with sad eyes, and nodded. "Yeah, I understand," he whispered. "Sometimes it keeps me up at night. I keep thinking...what if you meet someone, or what if the distance is too much, or-"

"Oh, no," she said softly, stopping in the middle of the dimly lit sidewalk to face him. "No, Ben, don't worry about that stuff. I'm just thinking about how much I'll miss you, but you don't have to worry about  _that_. It'll all work out, even if it's hard."

"How are you so sure?" he asked, staring down at her, his eyes swimming in a pain she hadn't seen before.

"Because we love each other," Rey shrugged, "and...can you really imagine either of us ever loving anyone else?"

"No," he answered quickly, "of course not."

She smiled, and said quietly,"Then don't worry. No matter what happens, we'll come home to each other. I know it."

Ben sighed, and nodded. "Yeah, you're right. It's just really hard to keep saying goodbye."

"Then we stop saying goodbye," she said after a moment. "Just leave me with a kiss."

His eyes searched her face carefully, and a minute later he enveloped her in a tight hug. "I can do better than that," he murmured. "I'll leave you with a promise. I promise, someday, we'll be married, maybe even live back here, and we'll never have to say goodbye again."

Rey sagged into his arms, nuzzling into his chest. "I'm going to hold you to that, you know."

He chuckled softly, and leaned down to kiss her forehead, then whispered, "Good. I hope you do."

"Of course I will," she assured him, "It'll happen, even if I have to insist on you following up on that silly marriage pact, and-"

Rey never got to say the rest, because he interrupted her in the sweetest way possible. He lifted her chin, and softly pressed his lips to hers. And because she was the first and only person he'd ever kissed, she was experienced enough in  _Ben_  to know that he preferred to take his time, and kiss her thoroughly, leaving her gasping for air.

At some point while he was kissing her, there was a little voice in her head that said nobody would ever be able to kiss her the way Ben Solo did, and Rey knew in her bones that it was true.

And whatever the future had in store for them, she could believe one thing with absolute certainty - she'd love him her whole life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	12. Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this ended up being a two-part epilogue. Or, maybe it's just another chapter before the epilogue? I'm not entirely sure. I'd say sorry, but I'm not. I'm enjoying writing this too much to be sorry that I've upped the chapter count.

Ben nuzzled her awake. He sang her name as he climbed into bed next to her and tried to pull her mostly vegetative form into his arms. Rey, normal human that she was, groaned and grumbled, and at one point threatened physical violence. She rolled away from him to smother her face into a pillow, and drown out the loudness and brightness of day.

"C'mon, darling," he chuckled, and dammit if it didn't tingle to hear him so close, "I got a bunch of info from that realtor mom suggested. Don't you want to see some houses?"

It didn't seem that he planned to leave her alone any time soon which, really, was just a bit cruel since  _he_  was the reason she was so tired. Unsurprisingly, he'd had a very specific idea of how to celebrate their real engagement, one that she'd wholeheartedly and enthusiastically agreed to at the time.  _Loud_  didn't really cover the sort of sounds that she'd made the previous night, though it was a good start. She'd found herself more than a little thankful that Han and Leia's bedroom was on the opposite side of the house.

When she didn't respond to his prodding, Ben added, "I brought you a bagel. And coffee."

_That_  got her attention.

She whined softly and finally lifted her head, lazily cracking an eye to glare at him. "What kind of bagel?"

"Plain, veggie cream cheese, coffee with hazelnut creamer," he rattled off, and Rey started wondering if they could have the ceremony right there in bed that morning. His memory was impressive.

"Okay, fine," she sighed, finally smiling as she sat up against the headboard and grabbed the bagel. "So, houses. I assume we're thinking nearby?"

Ben nodded, and sat next to her on the bed. He'd discarded his shirt, and smooth, mostly unblemished skin (the blemishes were courtesy of her appreciation in the past few days) seemed to glimmer in the morning light. "I know we don't have to buy right away, but I was thinking we might not want to keep staying here-" he blanched, and muttered, "Uh, apparently sound travels well in this house."

"Oh." Then Rey's eyes shot wide, remembering all the times her and Ben had previously had sex in his room, thinking they were far enough from his parents so they wouldn't hear. Suddenly all the knowing smiles and  _oh dear lord,_  "The Talk" seemed to clear into her memory's focus like a neon-orange billboard. " _Oh no."_

Well, that probably meant they knew about Ben's newfound daddy kink. And hers. She'd originally been joking when she mentioned it to them,  _but…_

She eyed the coffee in the paper cup in his hands and wondered if she focused on it hard enough if it would turn into gin.

"Yeah," Ben groaned, there was a haunted look in his eye, and Rey just knew it had been Leia to inform him, "You'd think they would have said something before now, but apparently not. I mean, we've been having sex in this house since we were teenagers, you'd think  _maybe_  it would have come up in conversation. Anyway," he handed her the coffee mug and reached over toward his nightstand to grab a laptop, "the realtor set us up with an account online so we can take a look at listings."

Rey took a long  _hard_  drink of coffee, and nodded, feigning away her mortification, "I don't know about you, but I love the idea of being nearby. I'd like to be close to our parents, and Finn and Poe."

Ben glanced over at her before leaning in to press a kiss to her forehead. His kiss sent more comforting warmth throughout her whole body than any of the coffee did. "You're right - we should pick a place nearby. I gave the realtor a few specifics, and it sounds like we have a few options in the neighborhood."

Rey spent a few minutes sipping at her coffee while glancing over the listings he'd brought up on his laptop, and finally snorted, "Is this woman insane? Why are all these places so huge? I haven't seen a single one on here with fewer than-" she paused, taking a closer look, "What, four bedrooms? That's nuts."

"I told her we needed four," Ben shrugged.

Rey frowned. Sure, he'd grown up in a massive house, but she'd always gotten the impression he didn't like that very much.

Ben winced when he saw her jaw drop.

"Are-" she started and then stopped. She let out a nervous giggle, and felt the press of the fabric against her bare skin and imagined it over so much more of her. "Are you out of your mind?"

"...were you thinking more?" he asked hesitantly.

Ah, yes. He'd clearly gone insane. Pity, he was so pretty.

" _More_? No I wasn't thinking  _more_." She looked at him in disbelief and finally started fully laughing. This had to be about something else. "You must be crazy. We do  _not_  need than many guest rooms. Who are we even going to have visit? Almost everybody we know lives within a few blocks."

"Well, your friend Rose, maybe?" he suggested. "But...I thought one could be an office since I might be able to do a bit of work from home. Then we'd have our bedroom, and we could have a guest room."

"That's three," Rey commented, and paused, looking up at him.

Oh.  _Oh._

Oh damn, she was right.

They hadn't exactly had  _that_  conversation. Or, at least, the closest they'd gotten to it was during the few times Leia had pushed her to drink. But there was a difference between Leia methodically chasing after her with a book of baby names, a dozen different stories about who carried what name in the family and such...and Ben genuinely planning for a future with her.

A future that involved something small and theirs and probably a little pink with Ben's silky long locks and-

_Ka-thump_  went her heart.  _Ker-snap_ went her reason.

"Oh," she finally said, once she'd processed the implication. Ben was staring over at her, not fidgeting but clearly wanting to, and all she could do was repeat, "Oh. Huh."

Ben cleared his throat. "We could always find something smaller, if you want. I shouldn't have assumed- I know my mom's been saying stuff, and I definitely never expected it to be soon, but I  _was_ kind of hoping-" he froze, and backtracked quickly, "But it's definitely not necessary, it's not even a big deal, it was just an idea, and-"

Rey put a finger to his lips, and tried not to think about the many things he'd done with those lips of his the past week. That resolve lasted for about two seconds. She was a heterosexual woman, not a robot.

"Ben, stop," she said softly. "Four is fine. Uh, bedrooms, that is. Just know that it'll be an extra guest room for a while. Possibly forever."

He didn't react visibly but she could see the question in his eyes, and the makeshift kiss on her finger seemed intimate and full of yearning, but she had to answer the question in his eyes.

"I'm just not sure, okay?" she finished, a little lamely, but entirely honestly.

He nodded, and she tried not to notice the disappointed look that crossed his face just before he flashed her a smile.

* * *

Ben had the afternoon free since Leia had insisted on dragging Rey off  _alone_  for something wedding-related, and since he felt a bit guilty about it, he'd invited Poe over so they could figure out what part of the wedding-planning they were responsible for. After a few hours and a few drinks, they'd determined that they were responsible for making sure they had suits, and possibly...photography?

Honestly what went into planning a wedding and who came up with the playbook for such things? They'd gone over seating arrangements, and Ben wasn't even sure they were going to have enough people to require such a thing.

Neither of them were entirely sure what they were supposed to do, but after sending their mother a text, they were left with the reality that the woman had everything handled. They spent a minute feeling simultaneously guilty and relieved, and that's when Poe jumped up and walked over to the bar, seemingly intent on pouring them each another drink.

"So I heard from Finn that you guys are checking out houses? Four bedrooms, huh?" Poe chuckled, "Should I read anything into that? I know Rey  _said_  she wasn't, but-"

That brought to mind this morning and the conversation they'd both skirted around (well, more like leapt over precipitously), and Ben finished the rest of his drink in one go.

"She definitely isn't," Ben said quickly, shaking his head.

Poe paused, set down the decanter he was pouring amber liquid from, and in a tone of uncommon sobriety said, "But you want kids, don't you?"

It was unfair how well the man could read Ben.

Ben wondered how much he could divulge without venturing into  _wallowing_  territory, and after a few seconds hesitation, admitted, "At some point."

His brother nodded knowingly, and drank the contents of one of the glasses he'd poured. "Does she?"

Ben swallowed hard, answering honestly, "I'm not sure. She said the room would be an extra guest room for a while. Possibly forever. I'm not sure exactly what she wants though - we didn't talk about it much. I just…" he stopped for a moment, working his lips together, and then said quietly, "I never thought I'd want kids, but with Rey…"

He thought of tiny, stubby hands reaching for his. Of the distant thumps of small feet pounding around the floor of a house, laughter trailing gaily behind them as they turned the corner and he faced a freckled face with a permanent upturned grin.

Air. He needed to breathe.

Ben did so, and focused on that little dream. The smile, of course, would be all Rey's.

"I get it," Poe said, nodding at Ben's reaction. He smiled, and said, "You know, you should just tell her. It's a conversation that you need to have at some point. And uh…" he chuckled, "Finn and I will always be around to babysit."

Or corrupt. Probably corrupt. Ben trusted Finn to be responsible but Ben had grown up with Poe right down the hall and there was no way in hell any child left in their vicinity wasn't going to grow up as some form of rascal, ragamuffin, rogue, or some combination of all three.

Ben was too wrapped up in his thoughts to notice that Rey had come home a bit earlier than planned, and had leaned against the doorway to listen to the conversation.

* * *

An old action movie flickered on the television and played quietly as Rey rested her head in Ben's lap. Han and Leia had gone out to dinner for the evening, and they were taking the opportunity to relax together a bit before... _everything_. Before they had to deal with the reality that was home-owning, before the wedding, which, unbelievably, was just two days away, and before  _life_  set in and they had to actually move and start new jobs.

Safe to say, Rey was just a  _tad_  overwhelmed. But it was such a good sort of overwhelmed. Like being thrown into a bookstore and being told she could have as much as she could carry.

It was like the same feeling she'd had at her first birthday party after Maz had adopted her. She hadn't really made friends at school, and she'd barely spent any real quality time around Ben, but Maz, Han, and Leia had all gathered together, and the five of them had spent the entire day together. They'd gotten lunch, gone bowling, and then showered Rey with presents (at one point Han had brought out silly string, and literally showered her with it, the doofus). It was the first real birthday she'd ever had, and throughout the whole day, one amazing thing after another had happened.

As wonderful as the good-overwhelming feeling was, she was happy to be spending an evening curled up and resting on Ben. They weren't usually the sort of people to talk much during a movie, but it still felt as though a silent tension had settled over the room.

And, because clearly her brain had decided to take leave somewhere around the Bahamas, her gut couldn't help but wonder how much cozier everything would be with a small human lying next to them. They'd probably be the type to stay up late no matter the curfew, because both she and Ben were night owls and masochists like that. There would probably be many nights in the future when they'd be grumbling, swearing, or walking around in the dark as they woke up and went to tend to the crying lump of pink and softness incarnate.

Rey took a deep breath, and broke the silence, putting voice to what she'd been thinking about since she'd overheard Ben and Poe's conversation.

"Boy, or girl?" she asked quietly.

The room was dark, save for the light from the tv, but she could see the confusion written on Ben's face as he continued to gently play with her hair. His fingers curled and rubbed against her scalp and it was a battle not to just close her eyes and drift to sleep in his arms. He looked down at her. "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Rey answered slowly, "if you could pick. If we had one...what would you want?"

She closed her eyes. It was a little like skydiving, she guessed. Except, at least in skydiving you had a parachute.

"Oh." Ben cleared his throat, and considered it for a minute. "I'm not really sure. I don't think it would matter to me either way."

She nodded, and said quietly, "Maybe we could try for one of each...but not for a while."

When Ben didn't answer, she looked up nervously, hoping she hadn't said the wrong thing. But she didn't need to be worried, because Ben was staring down at her like she was the dawn after an endless night. A muted hurricane left his lips as he seemed to exhale and simultaneously breathe in her very presence.

"Yeah," he finally replied softly, nodding, "that'd be good. You'd really want that?"

"I've been thinking about it all day," she admitted. "It's not something I ever planned on, but…" she swallowed hard, and said quietly, "I like the idea of you being a dad. I think you'd be good at it. Great at it, actually."

"You'd be an amazing mom," he breathed, "but we can wait as long as you want. Whenever you're ready. There's no rush."

A small grin formed across her face as she asked wryly, "So, uh...should we go practice?"

Ben paused, then let out a laugh, and winked at her. "What do  _you_ think?"

* * *

No more than an hour later, Ben watched as Rey paced around the bedroom. She'd made plans to skype with her friend, Rose, that evening, but from what Ben could tell, the woman hadn't been around to take the call. He wasn't entirely sure why Rey found that so concerning, but she'd instantly gotten worried, and said something about her seeming a bit off during their last phone call.

Now, he frowned as he relaxed on the bed, in no rush to get dressed since he'd  _planned_  to either go for a second round, or fall asleep. Obviously, neither of those things were happening anytime soon.

"What do you mean,  _you're getting on a plane in the morning?"_  Rey asked into her phone, frantically. "You're coming here? I was just about to tell you I got you a plane ticket for tomorrow afternoon - I know you said you had the weekend free, and-"

Rey paused.

"Rose," she asked suspiciously, "Why are you already planning to come here? I haven't even told you we moved up the wedding to this weekend. If you aren't coming here for that, then-"

Ben winced as he saw Rey yank the phone away from her face.

"Why are you freaking out?!  _Yes_ , that's what I'm trying to tell you! The wedding's in two days...Why?  _Why?_  Because I want it to be, isn't that a good enough reason?...Yeah, of  _course_  I'm happy.  _No_ , I'm not pregnant and  _God_ , Rose, really? Of course I'm not being blackmailed, what the hell sort of movies have you been watching since I left?"

He knew they hadn't met yet, but he could already tell he was going to like Rose. Sure, there was a wariness lurking in the background of his mind, like a gazelle drinking from a lonely watering hole, but watching the multitude of expressions flash and disappear across Rey's face was worth it.

Ben snorted, and let out a laugh, but stopped as Rey's expression softened, and as she glanced at him, blushing as she said quietly, "Yeah, I love him. We just didn't want to wait any longer. Nothing crazy's going on, I promise. Okay?"

A soft smile finally grew on Rey's face, and she said, "Well, I guess I'm just lucky you're watching out for me. When are you getting into Logan? Okay, we'll be there to pick you up. Love you too."

She hung up the phone and huffed quietly, then looked up at Ben.

"So, uh," he chuckled, "she sounds fun. Who knew I could have just simplified this whole thing and blackmailed you into marrying me?"

Not that he'd ever have considered it. Rey had a battalion of family members and friends in the area who would have made sure Ben learned that such idiocy wasn't to be put up with. He  _liked_  having all his teeth, thank you very much.

"Nice," Rey said dryly. She rolled her eyes and let out a giggle. "Rose means well. I can't really blame her for that reaction, honestly. If you think about it from her perspective, I was engaged to someone else a little over a week ago, and now I'm getting married in two days. It  _is_  a bit unorthodox."

Ben couldn't stop the choked laugh from escaping him.  _Unorthodox_  might as well have a seat at their dinner table for how bizarre and convoluted and absolutely wonderful the past few days had been.

At Rey's glare, Ben remembered that  _this_  was the woman he was spending the rest of his life with, and decided to show some husbandly support. "Okay. Fair enough."

* * *

The next morning, Ben's internal pilot had somehow swapped places with a bodhisattva. There was a haze of peace hovering about him, a fragile, precious thing that somehow held its shape like a bubble amidst a windy day.

It was t-minus one day and while Ben was calm by some turn of brain chemicals or good sleep, it was like someone had put a drug or some sort of super-caffeine in everyone else's coffee. Even Rey had hopped out of bed early, pulling him into a shower (not that he minded that part) before 8 AM. If he hadn't been so drowsy, he might have made an  _Invasion of the Body-Snatchers_  reference, because since when was she a morning person?

Leia had started shouting up at them to hurry up halfway through the shower (it was a nice reminder to call the real estate agent back to schedule a showing for the house they were interested in), and before Ben had a chance to grumble  _what the fuck is going on?_ , Rey had dried off, scrambled into clothes, and dashed down the stairs.

Ben had lumbered down the stairs ten minutes later, muttering various swears under his breath until he finally reached the coffee machine and found it-  _empty._

The flimsy film of calm trembled. He wasn't that surprised, however. It was going to be  _that_  sort of day, apparently.

Rey rushed over to greet him with a kiss and said quickly, "I completely forgot - I have the dress fitting-thing today. I don't really know what Amilyn's going to do. I'm pretty sure the dress fit perfectly, but apparently it's a  _thing_  that brides do, so I said I'd meet her at ten."

She said the word "thing" like it was an mandate by the laws of physics, and for all Ben knew, it was.

"Okay," Ben shrugged, trying and failing and sounding helpful. He had about as much knowledge of wedding setup as he did open heart surgery. "Is that a thing I go to? Is there anything I need to do?"

He regretted offering the moment Rey stopped her jittery frenetic motions, and looked up at him with beautiful, wide, doe-eyes. His self-preservation instincts never kicked in.

_Oh no_.

That was a look he'd never been able to say no to.

"Well," she bit her lip, and Ben knew he was fucked. He'd say yes to whatever she wanted. Shave his head for the wedding?  _Whatever._  Wear a pink tux?  _Sure._  "Actually, I was wondering if you'd mind picking Rose up at the airport. I was planning on going but obviously I can't, and Poe and Finn are both working today-"

"Yeah, of course I can," he said. Realistically, on the spectrum of things she could have asked, driving into Boston and picking the maid of honor up actually wasn't that bad. He could even stop and pick up coffee on the way,  _and_  it would give him the opportunity to convince Rose he hadn't knocked up or blackmailed her best friend.

She'd beamed up at him and pulled him down for a kiss, slow and languid, that woke him up more successfully than coffee ever would.

Then she'd dashed off to run out the door behind his mother.

And  _that_  was how he ended up in a car alone with Rose Tico, on an hour long car ride back from Boston.

Rose seemed kind and very honest, and he could see almost right away why she and Rey had become friends. The woman seemed very fond of Rey, but possibly  _not_  super fond of him. Or maybe he was reading too much into her silence. Realistically, Rey was probably the only woman Ben had ever been good at reading, so he wasn't entirely sure.

Thankfully, about ten minutes after they left the airport, she turned in her seat, and said quietly, "Can I ask you a few questions? You don't have to answer, if you don't want to. But there are a few things I've been wondering about."

Ben hesitated, and glanced over at the woman. She was small - even smaller that Rey, with long, dark hair and an expression that spoke of curiosity, with fiery protectiveness hidden behind it.

Yeah, this girl was the perfect friend for Rey. Whether or not Rose liked him, he already liked her. So, he nodded, and waited for her interrogation to begin.

"Do you love her? Like,  _really_  love her?"

That...wasn't what he'd been expecting.

He smiled softly (and if Rey were around, she would have added  _goofily_  to that description), and said, "Yeah, I really do. I have since we were kids, and after our relationship ended I spent a long time trying to convince myself I didn't. I think I succeeded for a little while, but last week, when I saw her at the airport…" he took a deep breath, and sighed, "it just all came rushing back. I think I would have been a mess if we'd both just gone back to our regular lives after Maz's wedding. I don't think I could have done that. I think I would have ended up hopping a plane to Chicago, honestly."

When he looked back over to gauge her reaction, Rose was grinning.

"Good," she said finally, "That's a relief. I was kinda worried," she admitted. "Don't get me wrong - Rey's an adult, and she can make her own decisions, but I  _hated_  her ex and I spent so long knowing he was an asshole, and I never really said anything. Considering how it ended, I kinda wished I'd said something early on, but…" she sighed. "I guess I'm just glad that this isn't like that. You seem really nice, so, I'm not in another one of those situations where I don't know whether or not to tell my friend she's planning on marrying a total dick, y'know?"

Ben paused for a moment, and then let out a barking laugh. "Uh...thanks?"

"It's a compliment, don't worry," she snorted. "So, you and Rey have known each other since you were kids, huh?"

He nodded. "How much did she tell you?"

"A lot, I think," Rose shrugged. "Or, at least, the gist."

"And you still-" he stopped, working his lips together as he came up with the right word, " _approve?"_

Rose frowned at him. "Is it really my place to approve or disapprove?" She shrugged again and said, "Look, I don't know the full story, but after hearing everything Rey told me about why things ended, I kinda get it. I get why you didn't want her to sacrifice her dream school, and I think it was a surprisingly selfless decision for a teenager. I think you could have handled everything that happened after that a bit better but," she sighed, "Again, it's not really my place, y'know? Plus, it's in the past. Are you going to do it again?"

The thought was as anathema to him as throwing himself into a fire. Probably more, because at least he knew there was a chance of surviving the fire. His heart would be shredded beyond repair if he ever did anything as monumentally stupid as that again.

"No," he breathed, "no, of course not."

She smiled over at him, "So then, why worry about it? Move on. It's in the past."

Ben hummed, and nodded. "I can see why Rey likes you."

The woman let out a laugh, and said, "Right back at you."

After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Rose spoke up again and said, "She's kind of amazing. You're a lucky son of a bitch, you know that, right?"

Ben blinked, and looked over to see her smirking. He wondered if he should have commented on the name she maybe inadvertently deigned to his mother. Then again, considering the blunderbuss bravado and forwardness of his mother the past week, he was right on board with that appellation.

"Yeah," he said, and then licked his lips. Luck didn't even begin to encompass the impossibility of the lightness in his chest or the hope in his soul. "Yeah, Rose. I know. I think I'm the luckiest guy I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WRITER'S NOTES:
> 
> Attack: Honestly there's nothing more heartwarming and adorable than having your husband write a guy's POV on wanting kids. _swoons_
> 
> Onfire: Ben Solo has a stock of terrible dad jokes saved up (let's be honest, Han's a goofball screwball, there's no way he hasn't told a dad joke at least a few times). Clearly he needs a small human around to use them on.
> 
> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


	13. Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't lie, I'm kinda sad this is over. It started off as just a "Equilibrium is bumming me out with all this angst, so I'll write a rom-com" sort of fic, but I actually got a bit attached. Oh well! Here's the epilogue, and no, I don't really plan to add on to this. Onfire and I are happy ending it here. :)

Rey's heart hammered beneath a cotton robe as she took deep breaths and closed her eyes, trying to hold still as Rose attacked her eyes with makeup. The women taken over one of the large bedrooms of the Solo-Organa's lakehouse, and Maz and Leia had ducked out to check on  _the boys_ , clucking on their way out of the room about how they were sure none of them actually knew how to tie their ties.

"I know you're freaking out, but you're gonna have to stay still," Rose scolded. She swiped at Rey's eyelid with a small makeup brush, "This color is going to be  _perfect_  with your eyes - I'll be done in two minutes, and then we're taking shots. You need it."

"Yeah," she breathed, "That's brilliant, Rose. You're the best."

She could practically hear Rose's grin as she said, "I know, I'm amazing." Then she paused, and said, "But, seriously Rey, why are you freaking out? Ben is ridiculously in love with you - you should have heard him when he picked me up from the airport. Once we got talking the guy just wouldn't shut up about you."

Rey cracked an eye open and asked, "Really?"

"Close 'em," Rose ordered, and Rey snapped her eye shut, "And, yeah. C'mon Rey, you know you've got nothing to be nervous about. I don't think I would have believed it if I hadn't seen it, but you two are literally perfect for each other. You'll be fine."

"It's not that I'm nervous, exactly, " Rey explained. "If anything, I just want to be married to him already. But...this all seems so crazy. I just...Rose, I don't know how all of this happened. I haven't told you much about my life before Maz adopted me, but I had a pretty fucking awful childhood before I met her-" she paused, and said softly, "and then I got to this amazing home and for the first time in my life I had parents and a bed, and three meals a day, and I thought my life was as amazing as it could get."

"Oh, Rey," Rose whispered, her hand stuttering with the brush, "I knew you were adopted, but I didn't realize things were that bad when you were a kid."

"Yeah, and then I got here and it was like a dream come true," Rey gushed, "and Han and Leia were like second parents, and I met Ben and everything just kept getting better, because…" she swallowed hard, "because I fell in love with my best friend, and now it just seems so unbelievable that I'm getting to marry him. I guess I just never thought that this much  _good_  would happen in my life."

"Open," Rose said softly.

She opened her eyes and let Rose swipe at the stray tear that was rolling down her cheek. The woman was smiling fondly at her, and said with a laugh, "I'm really glad we went with waterproof mascara."

Rey let out a giggle, and nodded. "Yeah, me too."

The woman in front of her paused, and said, "Rey, you're my best friend, and you  _know_  I'm honest with you, even when it sucks to hear. So...hear this." Her hands tightened around Rey's as she said, "You deserve to have an amazing life. You talk like all of this great stuff is just happening to  _you_ , but you aren't seeing the full picture."

"What do you mean?" Rey asked curiously.

"I mean, you're only seeing things from your perspective," Rose explained. "Flip it around. Maz got to be a mom, and raise a daughter. Han and Leia got to have a really wonderful girl-turned-future-daughter-in-law in their lives." She hesitated, and added softly, "Ben got to grow up and fall in love with his best friend." Rose smiled, and said, "You've been just as good for all of them as they were for you."

Rey sniffled and gave her friend a watery smile before pulling her in for a hug. "You know I love you, right?"

"Yeah, Rey," Rose nodded against her shoulder. She let out a laugh, and said, "I love you too. Trust me, there aren't a lot of people I'd just jump on a plane for."

Rey let out a laugh at that, and pulled away, nodding.

"Okay," Rose said quietly, squeezing Rey's hand, "Ready to get our dresses on?"

She turned to look at the white dress that hung on the back of the room's door, and smiled broadly.

* * *

Ben rolled his eyes as his mother scolded him for the billionth time and adjusted his tie.

"Mom, " he groaned, "I'm almost thirty, trust me, I've figured out ties. Could you just-" he pulled away and gratefully accepted the glass of  _whatever_  Poe was handing him, "Could you go  _help_  Dad or something? Finn and Chewie are still up there with him, but you know how he is with formal-wear."

She'd just muttered something about ungrateful children and flitted off out of the living room, in his father's direction while he and Poe exchanged a look. "Y'know, that's one benefit of you moving back," Poe commented, "We can split the  _mom_  craziness. You deal with her insanity one week, I can take her the next."

Ben chuckled, and shrugged, "She means well. She might just need another hobby."

"She  _needs_  grandchildren," Poe said, and then hesitated before asking quietly over the rim of his glass, "Any...uh...updates on that whole situation? You  _did_  talk to Rey, right? Because, man, you know I think you guys are perfect together but that's something you should probably agree on."

"Yeah, we talked," Ben said softly, grinning. "It might be a while, but, uh...yeah. We're on the same page."

Poe must have noticed his grin quickly, because he returned it, and winked, saying, "Well, then that deserves another drink."

Before Ben could accept, Leia bustled back into the living room with Maz trailing behind her. A minute later, Chewie, Han, and Finn followed, and Ben's heart leapt into his throat when he realized they were only waiting on Rose and Rey, and he was within an hour of marrying his best friend.

"Your father mentioned  _you_  are walking Rey to the altar?" Leia asked, seeming confused. "You know it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding."

Ah.  _That_  was something he and Rey had decided together - it was a bit unusual, but with so few people in attendance, neither of them saw much point in keeping with tradition. When Rey suggested they simply walk to the altar together, the same way they'd done so many things before, it just made sense.

"That's the plan," Ben answered cheekily, "And honestly mom, I couldn't care less about luck."

Leia's eyes went wide, and Maz snorted, saying, "Couldn't care less about luck? You're asking for trouble, kid."

Ben shrugged, "Look, I don't care if it starts pouring and absolutely everything else goes wrong. I'm marrying your daughter today, and if that's the only thing that goes right, it'll have been a perfect day."

Maz considered him carefully for a moment, and then cracked a smile. "I always did like you. I've gotta say, I was a bit surprised to get a call in the middle of my honeymoon, hearing  _mom, guess what, I'm marrying Ben in three days,_  but...I guess, when you know, you know."

Next to her, Leia smiled, and gently elbowed the woman, "And hey, we'll officially be family."

Maz seemed like the was about to respond, but Rose knocked on the doorframe. Her hair was down in waves, and Ben's heart started thudding in his chest when he realized she was ready in the light pink dress her and Rey had picked out - if  _she_  was ready, that meant Rey-

"We're ready," Rose announced, "Rey said she'll be down in a few minutes, so-"

"Let's head out," Han interrupted, heading for the glass door that led out to a large porch.

They'd debated for a little while, whether to get married on the covered porch or by the lake, and they'd finally settled on a spot by the water. Ben watched nervously as each of them slipped out the door and walked down the porch's steps, and across the lawn, to the spot he and Rey had picked.

It was a perfect spot. They'd had dozens of picnics there, watched fireworks together almost every summer there, and at one point, Ben had thought maybe he'd propose in that spot, so it seemed only right that they get married there. He took a deep breath, watching as they all stood in two groups, making a makeshift aisle that led to Chewie, who'd gotten certified to officiate, and Ben was just about to start pacing nervously when a soft voice came from behind him.

"Hey, Ben," she whispered.

It was a voice he would have known anywhere, because it was the one that had raised him from his lowest lows, and brought him to his highest highs. Hers was the voice that had haunted his dreams, and acted as his conscious even during the years they'd been apart. It was the voice he could still hear blurt out  _I think I love you_ , at the same time he'd admitted it, too. The voice that had said  _you really think I'd let you end up with anyone else?_

He turned quickly, and suddenly, everything was okay. His nerves were gone, because  _she_  was there.

Rey was a vision in a white lace dress that echoed the dress she'd worn the first time they'd danced, and his heart warmed at that. She'd left her hair down, just slightly curled, but it could have been a mess for all he cared - he would have married her in pajamas, with a massive case of bed-head.

Either way, she was exactly who he wanted.

"Hey," he finally responded, unable to keep the silly, stupid grin off his face. "You ready?"

Rey let out a breath, and smiled up at him. "I think I've always been ready."

"Yeah," Ben nodded, "I know the feeling." He reached up to tuck a hand under her chin, tilting her head up as he wrapped an arm around her waist, and pulled her close, "Just want a kiss before we go," he explained.

Rey lifted up on her toes to close the distance between them, and met his lips with hers, sliding them gently over his for a moment before pulling away.

She glanced at him, and then let out a giggle. "Uh, when did the pink tie happen?"

Leia had handled nearly everything when it came to the wedding, which was why Ben hadn't given her too hard of a time for being a little extra overbearing during the three days she'd had for planning. The one thing he and Poe had taken care of was their suits, and at some point, he'd realized he wanted a reminder of the first time he'd really held Rey in his arms. Whether it was for luck, or sentimentality, or whatever, Ben wasn't sure.

"It's the same color you wore for our uh... _prom_ ," he said shyly, grinning down at her. "Do you mind? I figured it'd be okay since it matches Rose's dress, too. Finn mentioned that things usually match, so I thought it'd be a safe option."

The corners of her lips tugged up as she smiled softly. "It's perfect."

"Okay," he breathed, "let's go."

Her smile was breathtaking as she took his hand and followed him outside.

* * *

Two Years Later

Ben moved over her, kissing every bit of skin he could reach, mouthing at her like a starved man. It  _had_  been a while since they'd been intimate - not that they hadn't had the opportunity, but sleep deprivation really was a bitch. The minute they'd had an opportunity, and had both been relatively awake at the same time (what a miracle  _that_  was), Rey had nearly pounced on him.

"Harder, please," Rey panted, tightening her legs around him. She moaned as he did as she asked, and he bit down on her shoulder as her nails dragged up his back. " _Fuck_ , Ben, yes," she breathed, "keep doing that."

The fingertip that had been circling her clit continued at a gloriously consistent pace while his hips snapped against her, and when he began kissing softly around one of her nipples, she was gone - calling his name as her back arched up against him. Ben's hips stuttered as he groaned, filling her, and he reached up to cover her mouth with his hand seconds too late.

After he caught his breath, Ben let out a breathy chuckle, and said, "I think we need to figure out a way to keep you quiet."

"Crap," she whispered, "Do you think-"

The newfound silence was broken by soft stuttering cries from the baby monitor.

Ben snorted, and chuckled again. Then, as if in response, the cries began to build into something truly familiar. That was when Ben's shaking became full-blown laughter as his head dropped to her shoulder, and he inhaled the scent of her. "Well, at least we finished this time," he said, brushing his lips against her collar.

"Maybe we should take Poe and Finn up on that babysitting offer," Rey suggested, starting to laugh along with her husband.

He hummed, and nodded. "Yeah, maybe," he said, lifting up on his hands to press a kiss to her nose, "but in the meantime, I'll take care of it."

She was too tired to pounce on him again, but if they didn't have a little bundle of joy crying her little lungs out, Rey would have found some way to demonstrate her love for her husband, if only for that statement. She frowned as he climbed out of the bed and pulled on a pair of sweatpants, lifting up on her elbows to ask, "Are you sure? I can-"

"Don't get up," Ben waved her off, forgoing a shirt as he rolled his neck and stretched, "Really, I've got it."

Not one to argue, Rey nodded, saying, "I should probably get cleaned up anyway."

Ben leaned back over the bed to give her a quick kiss that still made her toes curl, then left for the nursery, winking before he left their bedroom.

A few minutes later, Rey came back into their bedroom after pulling a soft flannel robe around her, and she was greeted with the familiar, but nonetheless stunning sight of her husband sitting on their bed, cradling a little blanket-wrapped bundle in his arms. The soft green of the fabric contrasted with Ben's natural paleness, but the rich dark tuft of hair on their daughter's head matched beautifully with Ben's own.

She still hadn't entirely been completely sold on the idea of  _babies_  until she'd seen him holding one. Or, at least she'd been nervous about the idea, and maybe not completely ready to be a parent. But then, at an Organa family reunion, about a year after their wedding, a distant cousin, Kaydel, had needed to run out to her car and had handed her newborn off to Ben, of all people.

Maybe it was seeing his face light up and then coo at the pile of pink in his arms, or maybe it was the adorableness of seeing such a massive guy be so gentle with an infant...she really wasn't sure, but whatever it was had been enough to make her toss her birth control almost immediately.

Ben definitely hadn't argued.

It was one of the best decisions she'd made, second probably, to marrying Ben in the first place. She hadn't realized just how much she could love until Hope had come into their lives.

She smiled softly at the view, leaning against the door frame, and her heart squeezed as he bent down to kiss their daughter's forehead. Ben looked up and grinned at her, saying, "Sorry, I think she's hungry. I'm uh- not exactly equipped to fix that issue."

Rey snorted, and walked over to climb into bed next to him. When she'd settled comfortably, propped up by a few pillows, he helped nestle their daughter into her arms.

"Did you ever think we'd end up like this?" he asked softly.

After a moment, Rey smiled, and glanced over at him, "Yeah. I told you I'd never let you end up with anyone else." The edges of his lips curled up as he leaned over and kissed her, and Rey murmured the words she knew instinctively against his lips, "I always knew we'd come home to each other, Ben. I've known it my whole life."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want more rom-com stories from us, check out our ongoing WIPs (we also have a few new ones starting soon), or come prompt us on Tumblr!
> 
> PS, the tie was totally for you, [ Reylocalligraphy!](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reylocalligraphy/pseuds/reylocalligraphy)
> 
> [ Onfire's Tumblr](https://thebuildingsnotonfire.tumblr.com/)
> 
> [ Attack's Tumblr](https://attackofthedarkcurses.tumblr.com/)


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